- Gender and Relationships
Should The Contact Stop Just Because He's Away? -Stephanie Bailey
When you meet a guy, it can be discouraging to discover he travels a great deal for work and recreation. What does that mean for your relationship? Will you hear from him when he travels, or does he get a free pass to not contact you? Are you supposed to accept that rule?
When a man is interested in you as a partner, he will move mountains and swim across oceans to stay in contact with you. Ok, that sounded extreme, but you get the point.
If a man with an extremely busy and important job like the president can make time for his partner, so can the man you are dating. He can call, send a text, or email if he truly is in an area that has no phone coverage. If he doesn’t, he is lazy, and more importantly, not that into you, or interested in a serious relationship.
In order to build a relationship you must have communication. If you’re dating a man who consistently travels, the foundation of your relationship will be harder to build since your time together is limited. Add the no communication factor when he’s gone, and you have a disconnected relationship. Frankly, he's not plugged in.
When someone is thinking about you, they will want to contact you. And if this person travels, they should definitely reach out first. But, that also means that when they make the effort, they should see the happiness in your return text messages, and hear the excitement in your voice during calls.
Ladies, don't always leave the ball in his court to reach out, make the effort too. Relationships are a two-way street. For example, if you are the one traveling, set the precedent with a text, phone call, or email. Hopefully that sets the tone for him to reciprocate when he is traveling.
Believe me, dating someone who travels can be very discouraging, and can make you feel vulnerable. When there is no communication, it is easy to question if your connection was as real as you thought, and hard not to have feelings of insecurity. If you both can communicate during these absences, these feelings of insecurity wouldn’t materialize, and you would definitely feel a continuity in your relationship.
Although it's important that you spend lots of quality time together when he's in town, its just as important to keep the connection when he's away.
When a guy is interested in you for the right reasons and wants to be with you, he will not let his travel schedule get in the way. He will call, not missing a beat, reaching out through text messages and periodic phone calls. If the relationship has emotionally excelled—he might even ask you (or perhaps fly you) to see him if he's gone over a long weekend or extended period.
When you’re dating, you know if it’s right or not. Listen to your heart. Do not give up on a traveling guy if he is not giving up on you. If he proves his interest and dedication to communicate while out of town, and makes an effort to spend time with you while he is around, he is someone to try to build a foundation with in your life. If not, the materials may be lacking to build a lasting relationship and it might be time, to give this man a one-way ticket— away from your heart.