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Does He Take Me Seriously Or For Granted? Seven Ways to Tell

Updated on November 9, 2019
Karen Whitefield profile image

Karen Whitefield loves to read, write and nap. Find her at true marriage stories [dot com].

1. He Doesn't Listen

Dating can often be confusing and one of the first signs that he is not into you is when you are giving him all you can and he just seems uninterested. Take for instance, this scenario: You decide to meet at a nice restaurant of HIS choice and you start talking about your day at work, but he is either looking at the hostess who showed you to your seat or looking away into the distance. This is definitely not a good sign. But how do you get his attention when he is not listening? Ask him about things that interest him instead of going on about your day. But what if that doesn't work? Then you know that he's one of those men who just don't listen.

Read the signs early on.
Read the signs early on.

But how do you get his attention when he is not listening? Ask him about things that interest him instead of going on about your day. But what if that doesn't work? Then you know that he's one of those men who just don't listen.

2. His Friends Don't Know About You

If he is into you and has thought about a future together, then it's pretty standard he would've talked about you with his friends. Do they act weird when you are around? Girl, run! This is a big red flag and you should definitely think hard about staying in this relationship. But is this a hard and fast rule? Maybe not. But listen, no dating rule is written in stone. But one rule stays true: If he is thick with his buddies, he will tell them about his dating life.

Is he blowing hot and cold?
Is he blowing hot and cold?

If he is being unapproachable, there is a very good chance he is not interested in a long term relationship.

3. He Ignores Your Calls

If he is serious about this relationship, he will make sure he replies to your calls and texts. You won't have to leave him a zillion texts before he dismisses you with a "Ya". If he is being unapproachable, there is a very good chance he is not interested in a long term relationship. It's not unfair for you to need attention in a relationship if you are willing to give it back to him, so, don't be afraid to reject him if he does this one thing to you. Solution? Don't go hankering him on his Facebook if he's not responding to your text, just wait for him to call back.

Beware if he doesn't respond to your texts.
Beware if he doesn't respond to your texts.

If he does not tell you clearly whether he is seeing anyone right now, it's clear that he is just not that into you. Have some respect: Either ask him upfront or let it go, you need to be with someone who makes you his priority number one!

4. He Doesn't Talk About His Relationship Status

Is he a bit shady when you ask him if he has a girlfriend? This is a classic way he is blowing you hot and cold. If he does not tell you clearly whether he is seeing anyone right now, it's clear that he is just not that into you. Have some respect: Either ask him upfront or let it go, you need to be with someone who makes you his priority number one!

He doesn't tell you his relationship status.
He doesn't tell you his relationship status.

5. He is Blowing Hot and Cold

Sometimes he showers you with all the praise in the world and then he suddenly acts like he just doesn't care? He is just blowing you hot and cold. When he is dodgy about his intentions, it's often a sign that he is not interested. Why? Because when someone is interested, they don't show you that they are not. What do you do? Observe his behavior for a little while and see if anything changes. Don't compromise your self respect. After having done everything, if you are not getting the attention you think you deserve, run for the woods!

If you can't tell if he's interested, it's usually a no.
If you can't tell if he's interested, it's usually a no.

Signs He's Taking You For Granted

6. He Does Not Give You Compliments

One of the not-so mysterious things about being in a relationship is that when he likes you, you will know! Men are very straightforward and when they want to be with you, more often than not, they will tell you. So, if he does not appreciate you for the little things or if he does not acknowledge the efforts that you are making, leave. But what if you have your heart set on him? Whatever you do, don't show him that you are desperate for his attention. If he is not giving you what you want, you know what to do.

If he does not give you compliments you should question his attraction toward you.
If he does not give you compliments you should question his attraction toward you.

So, if he does not appreciate you for the little things or if he does not acknowledge the efforts that you are making, leave. But what if you have your heart set on him? Whatever you do, don't show him that you are desperate for his attention. If he is not giving you what you want, you know what to do.

7. He Refuses to Talk About the Future

Well, okay, it maybe too early in the game to think about marriage, but does he ignore any initiatives on your part to discuss your future? If he doesn't see you together, then it may not be a very good sign. It's true that no one really knows where the relationship maybe headed, but there are some things that you want clarity on right from the word go.

If he's not talking about your future together, it should be a red flag.
If he's not talking about your future together, it should be a red flag.

If he doesn't see you together, then it may not be a very good sign. It's true that no one really knows where the relationship maybe headed, but there are some things that you want clarity on right from the word go.

Is He Interested Quiz

Does Your Crush Show Any Of These Signs?

See results

© 2019 Karen Whitefield

Comments

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    • Karen Whitefield profile imageAUTHOR

      Karen Whitefield 

      5 months ago from New York

      I am laughing hard at the fifth guy theory. You know, I have to say: it's true! I remember reading/watching some talk that mentioned how we will always choose a mate that's wrong for us. Who is a bit "challenging". It's crazy how human psychology works.

    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 

      5 months ago from Chicago

      And yet women love these types of guys!

      You could stick such a woman in a room with five guys and have four of them drop to their knees extending their heart out towards her while the 5th guy sits in a corner sipping a cocktail acting as if she does not exist. That will be the guy she wants to get to know!

      She sees him as being a "mystery" and a "challenge". If she learns other women want him as well that makes his stock rise even higher. She has to "prove to herself" that she can get his attention.

      He'll keep her guessing where she stands with him. Some women LOVE to try and "figure out" what a guy thinks or what he means.

      For such women love which comes easily without drama has less value. They've been conditioned by romance novels and movies that "true love" is a roller coaster ride filled with ups and downs which will eventually lead to a "happily ever after" conclusion.

      Everyone has heard: "Nice guys finish last."

      However no one has ever heard of: The "lonely" (player, bad boy, narcissist, a-hole/jerk, or gangster). Is that a coincidence? No!

      Generally speaking many women only give a "nice guy" a shot once they've given up on finding a guy with "swagger" who will also treat them well. Going out with a "nice guy" is a (practical) decision after experiencing multiple heartaches and betrayals.

      Sure he may have a degree, a good job, a retirement fund, be attentive, loving, loyal, affectionate, reliable and so on but she will never offer him the wild passion in bed she gave the "bad boy".

      it's the "bad boy" that makes a girl's heart beat faster.

      Most women outgrow their "bad boy" phase. However some choose to marry a "nice guy" only to cheat on him with a "bad boy".

      Some women just are not comfortable being placed on a pedestal.

      Their own family and best friends don't treat them like that.

      Guys who worship them or come off as "too nice" creeps them out! Oftentimes these guys end up being put in the "friend zone".

      Nevertheless it's not just women who are like this. So called "nice guys" for some reason refuse to pursue "nice girls"!

      I suppose everyone goes through a phase of wanting what they cannot have.

      If you're with someone who needs to "change" in order for you to be happy you have {chosen} the WRONG mate for yourself.

      Life is too short to be trying to change water into wine.

      The goal is to find someone who (already is) what you want.

      Unfortunately there's a learning tax in order to love and date smarter.

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