Sometimes You Have To Look In The Mirror And Support Yourself
I’m one of the lucky ones. I grew up doing theatre where I was accepted no matter who I was. I always knew my family loved me, never questioned it even for one day (even if my brother did tell me I was adopted and convinced me when I found my birth certificate that they change those to make the adopted child not “feel bad”). I have no huge tear filled coming out story, I simply told my parents. I have been with the same man for almost twenty-two years now and our parents have met and get along just fine. It’s Passover with my family and Christmas with his with very little drama. So I know how fortunate I am and I know that I have many people to “lean” on if the case be that I need to do some leaning but what I discovered recently was that even with all these people in my corner, there are times sometimes you have to look in the mirror and support yourself – Don’t Get Me Started!
Once again I defer to musical theatre writers who tend to write things that I feel just a bit better than me. In the musical Goodbye Girl (lyrics by David Zippel) the main character sings, “How can I win if I’m not on my side?” While this may seem as though it’s a sentiment we should all, all ready know (and maybe we do somewhere in our subconscious) there are many times when I forget this sentiment and I wish I didn’t.
I don’t know about all of the visualization techniques people talk about or even putting post-its about my mirror so that every morning I see, “Gosh you’re handsome today!” but I think that sometimes I look to others for what I should be finding inside myself. I want to see myself in someone else’s eyes because somehow that seems to give me more validity but the truth of the matter is that if you only look at yourself in the reflection of someone else’s eyes then you’re also giving everyone in your life a lot more power than they deserve or want really. It’s almost expecting too much of people and too little of you.
I admit that I have about as much right to give people psychological help as Dolly Parton in the movie, Straight Talk (am I the only one who can’t help but watch this when it’s on)? But I think my words will ring true for some people reading this somewhere out there in the Internetosphere. It’s sometimes stating the obvious that rings a bell in my head and since I have a blog I occasionally share my bell ringing with those who read me. “And if I were a bell, I’d go ding, dong, ding, dong, ding” (name that musical).
Recently I put myself in the running for the Oprah get your OWN show completion online. You need to submit a video (and if you’re reading this before July 3, 2010 – go vote - http://myown.oprah.com/audition/index.html?request=video_details&response_id=977&promo_id=1) and a lot of the people in my life told me how great they all thought it was and they even clicked a few times and voted. But behind those faces I saw what they were thinking, “There are six gazillion people trying for this thing Scott, what makes you think you’ll get chosen?” I’ll admit that there was a part of me at one point that saw some of the other entrants with six million votes and/or views and I thought I was out of my mind in the first place for throwing my stylish hat into the ring. But then it came to me, “Why the hell not? Why the hell not me?” I don’t know that I’ll be chosen, I don’t know that the casting people will even watch my video but as I watched and voted for myself yesterday I realized that whether or not the gang looking at this audition video thinks I’m “worthy” I all ready know that I am. I came up with a great concept for a show that I know I can bring my unique talents and humor to creating an entertaining and informative show. I’ve won all ready because although it was looking at my video online, I was looking into the mirror of who I am and what I’m capable of becoming. Sometimes you have to look in the mirror and support yourself – Don’t Get Me Started!
Read More Scott @ www.somelikeitscott.com