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Stop Being Shy Around Girls

Updated on May 13, 2013

All guys have, at some point, felt shy around girls. Your heart beats faster, you start to sweat and you might even say or do something stupid. Luckily there are a number of things you can do to manage your shyness and eventually, get over it.

Age and shyness

Guys tend to grow out of shyness, over time and with experience. In this article we will discuss a few ways to stop being shy around girls. But if it doesn’t work, don’t worry, because you will probably grow out of it.

Be a good listener
For shy guys, listening well is much easier than talking and the good news is: most girls love to talk. When you are listening to someone, be sure to make and keep eye contact. Do not look down. Also remember to smile and laugh every now and again, when it is appropriate.

This is more of a pull than a push strategy. It is intended to make you more approachable to other people.

The frog method

If you drop a frog into a pot of boiling water, it jumps out. If you put that same frog into a pot of room temperature water and slowly heat it, the frog doesn’t jump out. Similarly if you work your way up from low pressure situations and slowly get use to being around girls, you will eventually stop being shy around girls altogether.

Initially start out with activities where both guys and girls are involved. Maybe you could join a social or sports club. At first you don’t need to talk to the girls, just get comfortable, being around them. Once you don’t feel shy, in the group, talk to some of the girls. Start with girls, who you don’t find particularly attractive, as there will be less pressure on you.

If you are able to make friends with one of the girls, do so, having a friend who is a girl, is a great way to stop being shy around girls.

Mind over shyness
Your shyness is all in your mind and you can use your mind to overcome that shyness. What you do is to close your eyes and visualize yourself as a confident guy. Then see yourself having a conversation with a gorgeous girl. She is smiling while you do and say everything right. End it by saying out loud: “I am a great and confident guy”. I know it sounds corny, but it really does work.

Repeat this process a couple of times every weak and before you do any socializing with girls.

When you are speaking to a girl
When you are speaking to a girl it important to have good posture and to address them in a clear voice. Also remember to make eye contact. This can be perfected through practice. I suggest you practice in front of the mirror or on a pet.

As with any problem, you have to work to over come it. But even the worst cases of shyness can be overcome by diligence and hard work.


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      Michael Sibley 5 years ago from Trenton,NJ

      It's true that shyness is something alot of guys eventually out grow.Nice hub!