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Strengthen Your Relationship

Updated on February 26, 2011

When a relationship loses its spark, couples can begin to have quarrels. Sometimes minor annoyances can drive you insane. Couples can begin to see the small things they don’t like, and things they have not seen before.

First realize that this is actually a normal stage in a relationship that has lasted any amount of time.

You see, in the beginning of a relationship, you are not looking at the negative. You are blinded by being in love. What most people do not realize, is that feeling of “being in love” fades, or comes and goes through the life span of the relationship. It is a sad fact, but it is a stage we go through. It does not mean the couple does not love each other. After all, how could you be together for so long and not love each other?

work with it


Everyone has positive and negative in them, this is a fact we must face. There is no such thing as “a perfect person.” Everyone has faults. Understanding these things listed, is the first step into strengthening your relationship.

Learn to work with the good you have, be a team. You can fall in and out of love throughout the life of the relationship, but the true love will always remain.

Don’t just become a “habit.”

Follow some tips to help your relationship get onto the right track:

Don’t just become a “habit.” It is true that most people are creatures of habit, however, you should re-consider. Do things that are different. Say things that are different. Try new places to eat, or new things to do. Adding some newness can add a little more excitement for both of you.

have a first


Have many firsts. You should do things that both one of you have done before, and put it on your list of “firsts.” Your experience together will be unique. Later you will cherish, and remember those things that you shared as a first.

be positive


When you talk, talk about positive things. Talking about the positive, can actually make you feel positive, and give a relationship an “up-lift.” Try not to focus on all those things you want to nag about. Leave the nagging behind, and focus.


Be happy. If you are happy, you can affect the moods of those around you, telling them, they have something too to be happy about.

feel good

 Do things that make you feel good. Who wants to think it’s all about work? If you are doing things in a relationship that are considered work all the time, and you are not really enjoying them, then you are putting another negative into that relationship. When you do something for him/her, make sure you also enjoy it. When touch him/her, do you do it because it is natural? Chances are you touch, because it feels good to you. Do things that make you both feel good.

no fault finding


Try to not get into the talks about what the other needs to change, unless it is absolutely a must. If you are nit picking, and fault finding, you are going to just push each other away from each other.  Try to actually complement one another on your likes. Don’t drag a relationship down with negative. Sometimes a relationship goes into a down-ward spiral, because they are focusing on all the negative. Find the positive, and keep it that way.



Work together as a team. After all, that is what you are, is a team. When your relationship matures, you will realize that you two, and your family, is all you ever really had.


Communicate, do things together, respect each other, and work together as a team.  You may not fall in love again, like you did in the beginning, however, if you get into a different relationship, the in love stage will pass with them too. Appreciate what you have, work with it, and learn to enjoy it.  Once you understand how to respect each other, and do things as a team, you have one half of the battle fought. Your relationship will grow stronger and stronger each day.

Best of luck.


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    • sarclair profile image

      sarclair 6 years ago

      Thank you! I am glad you liked it LoraKay.

    • LoraKayAlexander profile image

      LoraKayAlexander 6 years ago

      Good advice!