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Surviving the Long Distance Relationship
Support and Relationships
Someone once told me a relationship isn’t like two people pulling a wagon, because that never works. It’s two legs on one body. If one leg gets injured, you don’t just stop. You change your stride and keep moving. If two people are pulling a wagon, and one of them gets hurt, it all stops. Now one person has to pull a wagon and carry the other. That won’t work.
The most important thing to a lasting long distance relationship (LDR) is that both people involved are ready, and willing to go in with all they’ve got. You have to be able to support each other when it gets hard. In every relationship, whether you’re right next to each other or not, you have to be a functioning team. Distance will test that team work, and push you until you want to scream. In the end, when the distance is closed, it’ll all pay off. You’ll be a stronger team because of it.
Endurance or Strength?
You’ll need both endurance and strength. Personally, I think endurance is really the key. You’re trying to get to the end of the race, no matter how long it takes. If you have all strength and no endurance, you’ll have a great beginning. You won’t have what It takes to get to the end, though. If you have all endurance and no strength, the road is going to be a really bumpy one and you’re going to crash. You’ll be running on endurance most of the time, but when days get hard you’ll need the strength. Go to your partner to find support, and remember you aren’t running the race alone. Others may support you, but no one is going to have your back like your partner.
A relationship that survives on communication alone sounds like it would be the most functioning couple in the world. Words get mixed up, meanings get confused, and that easily can lead to a fight. Which calls for more communication. Seeing someone’s body language is more helpful than you think. The up side to constant communication, is that you know how to talk to each other. So getting through rough patches isn’t always that hard, and probably easier than it is for couples who are right next to each other. You shouldn’t think of yourself a terrible person if you aren’t constantly talking to your partner. If you are, you’re quickly going to quickly run out of things to talk about to talk about. It’s okay to take a few hours or even a day to yourself.
If you’re an introvert in an LDR you have probably already noticed you have limited things to talk about. Having a limited social life keeps it hard to stay busy too, and staying busy is an important way to keep your mind off of things. There are perks for the introvert too, though. Being an introvert can really assist in communication, since you aren’t always busy. If your relationship calls for extra attention chances are you’ll be able to give it easily with no distractions. If you and your partner are both introverts, it can allow for a lot more alone time and chances to talk without distractions.
There are perks and downsides to being an extrovert in an LDR, too. They are very similar to introvert perks and downsides, actually. If you’re an extrovert, communication probably comes easier to you so talking to your partner isn’t always a desperate search for something to say. The downside to that is that it’s easier to get confused in conversation and lead to an unnecessary argument over a miscommunication. The plus side, there’s always something to talk about. Being an extrovert, you’ve got more of a social life and you’re busy more often. So you’re distracted easily from sitting around and just missing your partner. The downside, you have less time to dedicate to your partner. If you’re both extroverts, this could work out just fine. However, with both of you busy all the time you could find the relationship slowly drifting apart. It’s important to continue your own life, but it’s equally important to stay connected.