GOD IN HEAVEN...
MANNEQUINS WEARING RAGS
I have been married for 33 years. Not all 33 were good years. Both my husband and I came into our marriage - bags already packed with all of the old clothes we thought we would need. I wore my old stuff everyday and he wore his. I thought his clothes made him appear hard, controlling and confrontational. He thought my clothes made me appear remote and unreachable. Both perceptions were true...what were we to do? We grew increasingly uncomfortable, but could not seem to find a way to convience each other to discard our rags. So, we wore them for almost 20 years, knowing that they were worn out...thread bare...ugly. Our pride, mistrust, and fear of rejection had paralyzed us. We felt trapped in our rags like two dusty mannequins standing in the window of an old abandoned store.
The eyes open yet again.
They see the world from within.
Into place the mask will fall,
A stranger presented to one and all.
Time never ends for this traveler weary.
Nights and days – forever dreary.
A journey long - this path of lies,
Weight a soul with the tears it cries.
God in heaven knows this travelers sin,
Behind the mask and the eyes within.
Perfection viewed by passersby.
Compliments attest the lie.
And promises made exact a cost.
A heart and soul together tossed.
For just awhile – for honors due,
Perceived as one, in truth is two.
Heavy lies the burden of deceit,
Upon the heart of ones defeat.
The soul cries out for its release;
And only grace will grant it peace.
Truth - in – truth, its price is pain,
For the one whose heart will forfeit gain.
So the eyes behind the mask must keep
Dark the Secret till they sleep.
Until this stranger in torment flees,
Before the Lord on bended knees,
Where the truth is free to say,
It’s me O Lord, please hear me pray.
This masquerade has wearied my soul,
And longs to escape the story now told.
Pray make this mask I chose to wear,
The truth my heart can gladly bear.
The truth is often difficult to unearth, especially when buried for a very long time, and you are working with a spoon instead of a shovel. Shedding our old clothes and unveiling ourselves was not easy. There were days spent in agonizing darkness and days when the light of discovery illuminated our world. True love proved to be stronger than our fears.
We came to an understanding - my husband and I.
This understanding required me to expose myself and trust that he would not ridicule or reject who I was. I had to open doors locked to him (and others), for more years than I could remember. I had to face my fears.
He had to relinquish control, be still and quite his objections - and listen. He also had to face his fears, as he unveiled them to me, trusting that I would love him still.
We learned to communicate and began to utilize its power as we put our faith to the test and put our trust in each other, even when we doubted its existence.
We learn more every day as we work together. sometimes we stumble along the way, but our relationship grows deeper and stronger. Love contains a conquering power when allowed the freedom to grow, and the room to blossom...to open its many faceted petals to touch every portion of our lives.
Does this mean that our marriage/relationship is perfect? Not at all. Nothing is ever perfect. And to expect perfection only opens the door to dissapointment; and feelings of dissapointment allow negative thoughts, resentments, and self pity to override the positive...the good things that are happening in a relatioship.
Building a marriage - a relationship is like a bulder undertaking the construction of a house. Sometimes he will recieve a shipment of material and find boards that are not perfectly straight, or sheet rock that has flaws or goughes. A good builder can usually pull out the bows in the wood, and correct the flaws, and never comprise the structure.
The stability and appearance of our house depends on our ability to utilize and improve on the material we have to work with.
The secret here is - if you are an inexperienced builder, get advise and help from someone who has already learned and applied the things you need to know. And always remember this rule of thumb: A good relationship is not a 50 -50 proposition, it is always a 100 -100 proposition. If you are only investing 50% of yourself toward its success, it can never be more than 50% successful.
Copyright © C.A.Rolyn 2012 All rights reserved with the exception of digital image and video