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Teenage vs. Adult Love

Updated on January 2, 2012

During this holiday season I enjoyed an intriguing debate about true love. The center of the debate was teenage vs. adult love. One person argued that the realest love was that shared during our teenage years; a time when nothing matter other than the enjoyment of each other. There weren’t any bills, crying kids, or impressing your boss. A time when things were simply – simple. Then there’s the age old strategy for the proof that adult love is the truest – teenagers don’t know anything about love. There wasn’t an argument that adult know how to balance paying those bills, dealing with those crying kids, or dealing with that demanding boss. Just simply; teenagers don’t know anything about love.


Let’s take a look at the three forms of love:


1. Eros – self-benefit, erotic love, love based more on physical traits


2. Philos – gave-and-take, love based on friendship


3. Agape – self-sacrifice, unconditional love, love which is of and from God


If you look at the teenager and adults then place them at the intelligence they should have for their age; I find, malority iof the time, teenager have the truest of love. With that said, this doesn’t mean they have the truest of understanding when it comes to life and they shouldn’t. But this doesn’t mean that their love cannot be as true as that of an adult. Teenage love dwells within the three forms of love, which is encouraging, but the like of maturity may leads to a lot of unfortunate issues. Teenage love just – is. It not about the bills, kids, or boss because they don’t have any and truly they don’t matter. Love isn’t supposed to be about external attachments but the feeling inside that two people share and somewhere along the rise to adulthood we start to comingle external with internal and loss all hope.


Reality! All of the forms of love have a place when it comes to a relationship and should be felt. They are the ground on which a strong loving relationship should thrive. If you think about it the first thing you do is notice a difference about another person. For some its looks, for others it could be intelligence; whatever it is it brings out that erotic (Eros) side of things. This leads to you wanting to know more about that person so; now you will find every excuse in the book to be near them. Now you have formed some type of friends (Philos) and eventually move into the exclusive dating stage (Agape). I believe in order to have the best chance at a true and lasting love you should go thru all three forms of love then go back to one and repeat over and over again.







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    • MisplacedReality profile image
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      MisplacedReality 5 years ago from Atlanta

      Thanks @writeronline! Your secret falls in the Philos type of love, give and take. They say you should marry your best friend and sound like you did. Thanks again.

    • profile image

      writeronline 5 years ago

      Great sentiments, well expressed.

      It is possible to fall in love as teenagers, hold onto love during marriage, kids, mortgages, 'sickness and health', 'richer and poorer', and still share love of the abiding, true and unconditional kind as you grow into your older years. My wife and I did it. Still are. 42 years on. To me, the secret is to never be so in love with your own self that you put your needs in front of the one that completes you. Don't know if that falls into a particular category of love. I'd think True Love.