- Gender and Relationships
Ten Cheap Ways: How To Treat And Surprise Your Girlfriend And Make Her Feel Special
Women are from venus..??
As men, we all like to do something special for our girlfriends/wives etc sometimes. That shiny look of appreciation and surprise on your lovers face can be intoxicating. Unfortunately, we are notoriously bad at it. For some reason nature has decided to allow male attitudes to love and romance to totally contrast female expectations. A large part of the problem men have is that we hate to spend money without what we perceive to be a good reason, whereas for many women, the thought that you have spared no expense on her latest present-of-no-practical-use-or-relevance is part of what makes them feel so special. All is not lost, however. It is possible to make her feel special and not spend ridiculous amounts of cash. So here are my top ten ideas for romance to give your partner that feeling that she is the most special person in the world, without making you more familiar with your bank manager than you are with your partner in the process:
1. Make it personal
Flowers are all very well, but if you get the wrong ones or you don't really pay attention to what you're ordering, you end up spending a large amount of cash on something she isn't all that fussed on. If you find out her favourite type of flowers, or even just favourite colours, then go out and pick them yourself, you will score huge brownie points and spend next to nothing. Failing that, most supermarkets and newsagents do flowers at a tenth of the cost of a flower shop, and you can deliver them yourself at an appropriately romantic moment. You can save a huge amount of money just by listening to her and finding out what she likes. It doesn't have to be for her birthday or some anniversary either. Women love to get surprises out of the blue, and for no reason.
2. A little goes a long way....
Regular, little surprises or thoughtful gifts can go a lot further than a huge gift that you blew your months wages on. A chocolate bar or her favourite magazine every few days costs pence but looks very thoughtful. Do one thing a day just for her, even if it's only making the tea! At a cost of a few pence each time this will not make you suddenly more aware of those ads with that woman off countdown trying to hock refinance at you.
3. It's the thought that counts
Try to do something to spoil her. Breakfast in bed is an oldie and a goodie. Score extra points by putting a flower you picked in a little vase on the tray. For those who would rather not get up at the crack of dawn to slave over a hot stove, you could always do an evening meal instead. Every woman likes a meal cooked for her, but go that bit further and put candles out. In my experience, the more the better. You can entirely cover an average sized room in candles and it will cost you less than two quid!
4. Al fresco...
Picnics are another oldie and a goodie. With this one, it's all about location. The last thing you want having just laid out your perfect spread, is farmer giles driving his tractor through it! Choose somewhere romantic and away from the crowd. The beach is always a good one if there's one near you, failing that, a secluded area of a public park can work. For extra brownie points try to time it so you can see the sunset. You can check the time and position of the sunset online here http://www.timeanddate.com/worldclock/astronomy.html?n=136. This is usually only good in the spring or summer, but can still work in winter, and with a bit more preparation, could even be better. If you have a car, just take her somewhere scenic where you can watch the sunset and bring a hot flask with you.
5. Be mysterious
If you already have the perfect plan for a romantic evening, don't just surprise her with it all in one go, build it up a bit. The best way is to leave notes (you can also do this by text if this is impractical) telling her to go to a place where you have something planned, without telling her why. If you're going out, you could tell her to go home first(best if she isn't already there), shower and get ready, then to meet you somewhere. This will build the suspense and excitement. Or you could tell her you're going to pick her up from work and don't say where you're going, let her find out when you get there.
6. Get physical...
Offer to pamper her with a massage or foot rub. This will work especially well if your partner is the professional, career driven type. The stress of a day at work will still be hanging on her when she gets home, and this can work in your favour. Meet her with a glass of wine when she gets in, then lead her to a room you have previously prepared. Have some calming, soft music already playing, and candles lit ready.
7. If you can't say it, write it
Leaving little notes or messages for her can be very romantic. Even just the simplest little ones can pull at a womans heartstrings. A good one is to write a simple "luv u" in the condensation on the mirror so she will see it when she showers. You don't have to be wordsworth, the fact that it comes from you will be enough. If you are of a literary bent, little poems left in her make-up bag, handbag or under the pillow will work wonders.
8. Be adventurous
Women like a man who is prepared to take a risk to be romantic. I'm not saying you have to leap through the bedroom window dressed in black (this is actually more likely to cause you injury either due to poor abseiling skill or your partner hitting you with the nearest blunt object when she mistakes you for a burgular, and there is nothing more embarrassing than having to be rescued by firemen, dangling upside down from the roof of the house), but you can still be a casanova without going on a special forces training course. Take her somewhere neither of you have ever been before, try out new hobbies together, or cook her something neither of you have ever had (try to avoid anything you know she wouldn't like though).
9. A man's work is never done
Take the load off her by doing her washing or doing a bit of ironing. Even if you only do this once it will score major brownie points, which you can then cash in when you turn up at 3 in the morning from the lock-in you promised you wouldn't go to. Careful with this one if your partner is the fussy type though, you won't score any points if you present her with her favourite top with an iron shaped hole in it!
10. The grand gesture
Grand gestures don't have to break the bank. If you really want to do something special for your girlfriend, there are so many cheap flight operators out there nowadays that you don't have to spend the earth. A weekend city break or getting away somewhere sunny can still be cost effective. The key here is planning. Book the flights and hotels separately. This will usually only take an hour or so and will save you a fortune. Check the operators and try to find a weekend where the flights and hotels are cheapest. The best thing about this is, it doesn't matter when you do it, so you're free to pick the cheapest ones. When choosing a hotel, choose one slightly outside the resort or city, that way you will get a much better price for a higher quality hotel, and it looks like you have picked it because it is more romantic. For transfers from the airport, go to the website of the airport you are arriving at, as you will usually find local public transport is much cheaper. Hotels in the UK often do deals for weekends in the off-season, and it doesn't matter if the weather is bad, that's what wine shops were made for.
So that's it then..
Of course most men would like to think they are a bit of a casanova. Hopefully by following these tips you will be able to go some way to making that a reality, without hiding your bank statements. Women love to be told or shown they are special, but it's far more often the thought behind it than the amount of cash you spend. A thoughtful gesture, relative to your personal relationship, goes a lot further than letting her use your credit card for the weekend. Feel free to add your own ideas in the comments section. You might also like to read my article on romantic things to say to your girlfriend here: http://xxtonybxx.hubpages.com/hub/Romantic-things-to-say-to-your-girlfriend. Thanks for reading!