- Gender and Relationships»
- Relationship Problems & Advice
PFR : The Friend zone
Now lets get something straight;before the fear of hell, banshee, bogeyman, excessive burgers or whatever was instilled into you , there was always the fear of being friend zoned. This evil is beyond anything you would ever encounter in this world and once you come across it, you are never getting out. For the sake of those of you who don't know what friend zone means
'' the "friend zone" refers to a platonic relationship where one person wishes to enter into a romantic relationship while the other does not. It is generally considered to be an undesirable situation by the lovelorn person.Once the friend zone is established, it is said to be difficult to move beyond that point in a relationship.'' -Wikipedia
Well know that you have gotten the main drift of things, look into your relationship and locate people you are actually friend zoned with. Can't locate them? fine, I would help you out. But before then, lets look at the causes of being friend zoned
Causes of Being Friend Zoned
Not many guys like being Friend zoned but the truth is that they are always the ones that do things that put them there. Don't get me wrong though, it is not every girl you would meet that you would want to be intimate with (just most of them ). But you simply don't go to bars and night clubs all fresh and dressed up just to make friends. Neither do you work on your flirting skills to simply have small talks with girls. So the real cause of being friend zoned is the fact that most guys start up relationships without actually have the end in mind. Next point is making your self too available. You know, believe it or not, the girl might have actually thought about being with you at a point but then you simply spoil the situation by being way too available. This way you lack that mysterious and adventurous quality that captivates girls and end being the funny and gentle guy. You begin to hear say things like'' you are so nice, i wish i could fine a guy like you''( i mean wth! aren't you a guy like you?).
Signs and Symptoms of being Friend Zoned
I should point out the fact that guys are the main species that almost always contact this disease ( in fact I am yet to see a girl that is infected). The signs and symptoms include
- Excessive texts from the carrier of the disease(i.e the person friend zoning you) that mainly involves boring topics about school or work
- The carrier always falling back to you when she breaks up with her numerous boyfriends
- The carrier always suggesting getting a snack when she comes over to your pace
- She tells you all her deep and dark secrets when you guys have not even kissed yet
- She doesn't ever flirt you-not even once
- She loves to hug you a lot - but nothing more than that
- She tells you she loves you as much as Nicholas Cage loves debt( without any real attachment)
- She loves your company: to cry on your shoulder and for you to tell her everything would be ok.
Leaving the Friend Zone
Ok relax now, like any other disease in the world(except syphilis, Aids, herpes etc.) , this one can be cured. But be warned, it takes a lot of time and effort (you might even give up) to actually cure this illness . One important rule though is that you shouldn't never ask another woman how to get out of a friend zone (NEVER!). So now lets solve your problem
- Become Scarce Stop being there always, when she 'needs' you. Give her the ' you don't know what you have until you lose it' approach by not always going to see her when she calls for your company. Even if it is for a tea party(Just saying). This is actually an initial step so don't expect any real result from this approach
- Act more intimate If you only hug her brief, make it longer. If you only have casual small talks, throw into flirty comments (but only once in a while in the initial stage). Take her out to do more special things instead of just eating snacks by the wishing well.
- Get a Freaking Goal Do you want a long relationship, short one or just being friends with benefits? Whatever it is you are going for, it is really important you work towards that goal
- Become more mysterious Stop making your actions and decisions predictable. Add a bit of mystery to your life by reducing the number text you send her and not telling her where you are always going to be. As a matter of fact, get more spontaneous when necessary
- Never make your intentions know directly Might seem weird but NEVER let her know your true feelings for her until you guys are in a serious relationship. Instead work towards that intention without giving out as much hints as possible. Act as though she is actually irreplaceable (even if you think she isn't)
- Confidence Develop a new form of confidence, in direction of being able to try out new things and step out of your comfort zone.
Always remember ''The wages of being constantly friendzoned is being...