ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Christian Rules In A Godly Dating Relationship Part One

Updated on November 13, 2010

Over the years I have had the privileged of counselling many people in the area of relationship success. One of the most frequent questions I get asked is how do I conduct myself in a relationship.  This question stems from a desire they have to remain pure and to conduct their relationship in a God glorifying manner.

The following rules of Christian Dating have been developed to help answer this question and to give insights into what Christian dating entails.  The tips and advice given for each rule will provide you with a solid foundation for relationship success.

Rule 1.  Know Who You Are.  

There is a saying that says you cannot give what you have not got.  What this simply means is you cannot offer what you have not got inside you to another person. Therefore if you do not love yourself how will you be able to love someone else.

This rule is essential if you are wanting to have a successful relationship that lasts. It is important for you to know who you are, what your strengthens and weaknesses are, what your temperament is, what your likes and dislikes are etc.

Knowing who you are will help you to be able to relate to someone from a position of strength rather than of weakness because from the out set of the relationship you are aware of your shortcomings and strengths.

Rule 2. Know What You Want.

Once you know who you are it automatically  follows you should know what you want. if you are complete and whole as a person you will be able to clearly identify what you ideally want in a partner. The important point is to keep your check-list real.

Perfection may be what you want but it is not necessarily what you need. By writing down the key things you are looking for in an ideal mate helps to keep your mind focused when you meet someone. 

Rule 3. Pray.  

Your ability to pray is an essential requirement if you desire relationship  success. Praying helps to keep your mind at peace. When you pray God can show and direct you on the things you need to do and not do whilst dating. Through prayer God can speak to you about your chosen mate.  Indeed through prayer God can reveal intentions and motives. It truly is your secret weapon for dating success.

Rule 4.  Be Accountable.

Temptation shows no respect to anyone. It can happen to any person at any time.The young and the old can be affected by it.  The ability to resist it requires you to put measures in place to help limit the possibility of you falling into sin. 

One key way to prevent temptation spoiling your testimony is to find someone you can submit your relationship to. You need to find an accountability partner.  This person would serve as your spiritual guide and help to steer you from the dangers that can easily happen when you fall in love with someone.

When there is someone on the end of the  phone or someone  you talk to regularly about your relationship  you will want to be circumspect about how you conduct your relationship especially if you have a deep respect for your accountability partner.

Rule 5. Boundaries and Expectations. 

In the early stages of the relationship it is good to set boundaries and express expectations your may have for each other. Doing it early before the rush of love enters your being is important because you can think rationally and logically. The type of boundaries you should consider setting for yourself are:

  • Frequency of meetings
  • The extent of time alone together
  • The time you wish to be the latest you will be on a date together.
  • The extent of physical contact.
  • How many people you will inform about the relationship.
  • What you are ready to do and not do in the  relationship.
These are just  some of the boundaries you should consider.
In part two of the Rules of Christian dating we look at 5 more rules you should employ when you are looking for relationship success.

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • profile image

      Ade 

      6 years ago

      Mr Bee, i would suggest you sit down and discuss the areas you desire to change with your partner and between you develop the rules you desire to ensure relationship success. Be honest with one another and use the rules as a framework for developing your own Godly rules that you both agree to work with.

      If the desire is there to have a Godly it will all work out as you ask God to help you.

    • profile image

      Mr.Bee 

      6 years ago

      What would i do now that i have violated most of this rule?Is there any chances of making up? Or should i abandon the relationship and start afresh?I need advice pls.

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)