- Gender and Relationships
The Sad, Depressing Life of a "Newbie" revealed
"It might be because you are the new girl,"
Who can forget
that first day of high school, college, work, marriage and the list goes on. Actually the "first" day for some people is very traumatic and leaves lasting scars long after their newness is worn off.
Take me for example. I remembering the dread I felt about going from my carefree life of a youngster to the life of a first-grader. I never told my parents for I knew if I did, they would laugh at me and encourage me (in their own way) by saying things like . . .
- "Suck it up. And do not miss the bus."
- "You are too big to be crying."
- "What would your friends at school think of you crying?" (that was a useless question because I had never met the people I was to spend a year with in first-grade.)
- "Just look at you--people on the bus will laugh at you."
My parents meant well. But meaning well and making a young boy feel well are two entirely-different things.
"Newbies" are often laughed-at
What all "newbies" endure
and before I list the tragic things that everyone new at something or somewhere has to face, as you read these items, try to recall that feeling that ran through you when you walked into the office as the new guy or girl, or that first day at college.
Now it's easy to understand the tragic, depressing lives of "newbies."
All "newbies" either feel or are made to feel:
- Closed-off from the student body or regular employees
- As if they have intruded
- Like they are a deadly-disease
"If I had been given a choice of getting on the school bus or facing a firing squad, I would have asked for a blindfold and a cigarette . . ."
What did you do when you were a "newbie"?
The newbies" life is a lonely road
This poor "newbie" salesman
was literally "thrown to the wolves" on his first-day at work at a huge department store. He was not trained effectively in how the store's policies worked in conjunction with sales, so if you look closely at (photo above), you will see the stress and fear resting upon this poor guy's face as he struggles to sell this customer an appliance.
Things that are done to a majority of "newbies":
- Veteran employees will sometimes start fires in the "newbies" locker to get a laugh.
- Sometimes a "newbie" is made to endure hazing just like entry into a frat house in college.
- Dumping sewage upon the heads of "newbies" in the parking lot.
- Ganging-up on the "newbie" and beating him with brooms or mops.
- Smearing lard on a "newbie" and chasing him around the office building.
- Hiding the "newbies'" lunch, then eating it in front of him that evening.
- Telling the gruff boss lies about how the "newbie" is messing-up so much that he or she needs a good talking to.
- Locking the "newbie" into a hot closet and leaving them there all day.
Other images of "newbies" plights
Warning: some of this text may be too powerful for young people to read
What some "newbies" do to deal with the pain of being "new":
- Resort to alcohol to hide the pains of rejection.
- Smoking cigarettes to be like the ones tormenting him.
- Dressing slouchy on-purpose so he or she will not be made fun of.
- Becoming hard-hearted and joining with the regular students or employees to pick on other "newbies."
- Calling in sick for days in a row.
- Mortgaging their homes in order to get enough money for plastic surgery to change their looks to ward-off slurs and nasty remarks.
- Staying in the men's or ladies' room longer than usual to hide from the other employees.
- "Acting" sick to get to go home early from school or work.
- Taking self-defense classes.
- Begging their tormenters to "please" stop the harsh treatment.
- Changing jobs and schools frequently.
- Moving to other towns.
- Getting counseling from ordained ministers.
- Using psychiatrists.
- Having near-violent encounters with the tormenters and yelling, "Why are you doing this?"
- Talking it out in private with bosses or teachers.
- Being heart-broken because the same bosses or teachers are in on the fun-making.
- Getting fired on purpose to draw unemployment to get to stay hidden at home.
- Studying to be a monk in Tibet.
- "Acting" like they, the "newbie," has had a mental meltdown to get pity from the bullies who push them around.
Being the "newbie" is tough.
There is not a cure-all answer to the rough-treatment and harsh remarks that "newbies" endure, but there are some things the "newbie" might do to at least help his or her self-respect.
- Acting brave to show the bullies you are not afraid of them.
- Do not invoke an image of violence toward those who are making your life miserable.
- Do not make idle threats.
- Get an impartial-witness to stand-in to help you when you report these troublemakers to the manager.
- Fighting is a bad way to solve being a "newbie," so go the legal route.
In time, according to reports, the ones causing the "newbies," so much misery will grow tired of the same old harsh treatment to the "newbie," and go back to their work.
"Being a "newbie" is like dirt. Both will wear off."