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The guide to a long-lasting relationship

Updated on January 20, 2015

Relationship over time

Do you still recall the moment when your significant one proposed or accepted your proposal? Be it a relationship or a marriage, the thrill of success is pleasing. Seeing him or her would have been sufficed to give you a heart-pounding sensation. The beginning of the relationship is always considered to be the blooming stage. Life is seen to be always delightful and pleasant.

Like all other flowers, relationship will also meet the wilting stage. Over time, we would tend to. find that there is not much excitement left as we have known enough about our significant other. We have already used to have each other. Life goes back hectic as our time is fully occupied by our career. The main point is that there will be a point in the relationship where things do not run so well and there are always fights between you and your significant other. You feel that you are lacking of what the beginning of the relationship offered you and you are convinced that there is not much hope and love in this relationship.

However, it does not always go that way. A relationship can always be well-maintained if both parties do their part and put effort into it.

1. Tolerance
2. Spending quality time
3. Trust
4. Constant reassurance
5. Appreciation

1. Tolerance

This is one of the key elements to maintaining a relationship. When we allow our significant other to be in our life, we must learn to embrace everything about him or her, and that includes his or her weaknesses. Otherwise, never make him or her your significant other. We should always learn to put up and if there is indeed something which you dislike, discuss with him or her, instead of criticizing or complaining right into his or her face.

Also, be tolerant if there is any quarrel or argument. There is no need to be mad at something for days or weeks. It is just an exaggeration of emotion! Sometimes, fights are indeed inevitable as we may be stressful due to our career. But what we can do is that we can always put up with one another and stop the fight as soon as possible. No matter how, you know that he or she loves you. So, why try to hurt feelings among yourselves when you can tolerate and get back to normal or even closer?

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2. Spending Quality Time

When it comes to time commitment, you don't need to spend all the day with your loved one to keep the relationship to stay in put. Always know your priority in life and decide things accordingly. You can still focus on your studies or career even when you're in a relationship. You don't need to choose to have only one because you always get to have both. You only need to know how. Even when you are busy with your work or studies, you can always send a sweet love note to him or her when you are having a break. This would be enough to let him or her know that you care even when you're in the midst of work because he or she is your priority.

When you actually spend time together, be sure that he or she is your 100% focus. Do not be distracted by your work or other stuffs at this time. Try to make the time spent together to be unique and memorable. Enjoy the time together and that is a quality time well spent.

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3. Trust

You need to trust your loved one. In fact, trust is the fundamental foundation of how a relationship works. Therefore, you don't need to be with your loved one all the time. Give each other some personal space. This is essential as most of us need some time only for ourselves. Besides, if you are with him or her all the time, then you will not have much to talk about anymore. If there is any doubt in the relationship, then it means that you two need to work things out.


4. Constant reassurance

Over time, we need to always reassure our partners that we still love them and care for them. It is what that strengthen the trust in the relationship. It is good to always tell your partner that you still love him or her. Of course, there is no harm to bring in a little bit element of fantasy or sweet talk. You can also encourage and motivate them to be better in things they do.

5. Appreciation

You don't need an important date to give something or value someone. You can always plan something occasionally and give him or her something as surprise to spark things up. It is always pleasing to be cherished and cared by your loved one. Of course, important dates should be remembered for celebration too as it is very important, especially to women.

Taking your partner to travel is also a good idea. It is always pleasant to take your mind off work for some time and only enjoy the trip together with him or her.

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Comment below!

Do you have any problem encounters in your love life? How do you solve it?

Question

What do you think is the key element in a relationship?

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    • RC Zephron profile image
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      RC Zephron 3 years ago from United Kingdom

      Good point there, dashingscorpio. There is definitely a limit to such tolerance. I believe that when we actually meet the right one, these tolerance will be needed for us to achieve the goal. On the other hand, I feel that mutual trust is the foundation of a relationship and it is needed to be established as soon as the relationship exists. What can be earned should be considered rather of a strengthened trust and belief of the other.

    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 3 years ago

      Tolerance - Bear in mind everyone has a right to have "deal breakers" or boundaries in a relationship. If something is "unacceptable" to you then it means he or she is not "the one" for you.

      Most relationships fail because people (choose) the "wrong mate" for themselves. Human beings make mistakes!

      Trust - is like respect in that it should be (earned) over time. Too often people trust others without the benefit of observing them demonstrate honesty and integrity over a period of time. This is a conman's dream!

      The vast majority of working adults aren't "together" as much as they may think. They're in the car heading to work, 8 hours on the job, 1 hour for lunch, back on the road to home after work (that's if they don't make any stops for errands), have dinner, watch TV, and sleep 7-8 hours. We spend more "awake hours" away from our mates than we realize. Between what takes place on the job, in the news, ongoing issues with friends & family members, and your plans for the future as a couple...etc if you have "nothing to talk about" then you may be with the wrong person.

      One of the biggest issues people often have not done any serious "introspective thinking" to figure out who (they) are, what they want, and need from a mate (before) they pursue a relationship!

      That's the equivalent of going shopping without a list!

      These types of people tend to allow "impulsive connections" and "happenstance" to dictate their relationship choices. Soon afterwards they're trying to change water into wine or fit square pegs into round holes to make the relationship "work".

      If you're "in love" with someone reassuring them and showing your appreciation will come naturally. If you're really not "into" them your actions and behavior will naturally reveal that as well.

      The goal is to find someone who shares your same values, wants the same things for the relationship that you do, naturally agrees with you on how to obtain those things, and last but not least there is a mutual depth of love and desire for one another.

      Like attracts like and opposites attract divorce attorneys!

      There are only two ways to experience joy and peace of mind in relationships: We either get what we want or we learn to be happy with what we have. Accept them as (is) or move on. The choice is up to us!

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