- Gender and Relationships
The Signs of a Toxic Relationship.
The toxic person.
I never had to deal with much drama in my life. In fact I've always had a positive outlook on life growing up. Even in hard times I never let it bring me down completly. I am human and every now and then I'll have a bad day. But I could always keep my head above water and keep moving forward. I'd even say I have a very high tolerance for the negative things in my life. But one day I ended up having an ex partner that had a different outlook on life. I want to point out red flags of a toxic person. They may not seem apparent at first. A negative energy is lIke a virus, a cancer, venom that spreads in your system. Spoils the soul of a person if exposed to it too long. I hope this article will help you avoid what I had to go through.
They are always the victim.
The toxic person will be the victim no matter what. The world is always against them. But you know what? The world is against us all if we let it. This world isn't fair. But that doesn't mean that we have to let it bring us down. Just build a stronger foundation so the big bad wolf doesn't blow down your walls when you least expect it! They are the dog that bites because they are terrified of the world. And that's not the way anyone should live. If you live around this it will start to affect you and slowly bring you down with them. I have always like this one speech from one of the rocky movies in the video link above. If this speech doesn't give you chills then your the victim in life. This speech makes me want to go out and take what the world will throw at me. And to keep moving forward. You can look at my previous writings and I constanly say to always move forward. The victim in a toxic relationship will only drag you down.
Another quality of the toxic person is their constant abuse of substances. Most of the times they will be an alcoholic or on some type of drug to live their lives. If they have a cigarette habit you will probably realize that they don't plan on quitting the habit soon. Slowly sinking at the same time dragging you down with them. These substances will slowly become apart of your life if you let it. When you have someone who is addicted to substances they will probably not have societies best come around them. In fact what I realized with my toxic relationship is that this was normal in their eyes. That says a lot that they don't plan on getting anymore out of life but a numb lazy life. Given the substance abuse will alots show that they probably won't get a real job in the long run. It's a sad state for our country when the dope heads and burn outs will slowly bring this country down.
Lack of friends.
No I'm not saint. But if you stay in a toxic relationship you will see friends slowly begin to fade. You will start to notice friends are slowly becoming enemies if you stay with this person. It's a slow process but in the end you will see it was the influence of your toxic partner. They will make it seem like they are the victim and point the finger back at the innocent. I know most relationship depending on the partner you will lose some friend due to a jealous partner. But this example is from the person not being able to get along with anyone around them.
Why people stay in the relationship?
After reading all this you probably saying "why stay in this type of relationship?" Well most of the time these people love this toxic person. But you can lead a horse to water but can't make it drink. And that's what is going to happen here. You can try to make this horse see the light and change their ways but it's really in that person to want to change. Yes you might see a change here or there or they actually give a 100% but it's only temporary. After a while you gotta know when to fold and just get a new cards. This is probably the hardest part of it all. In fact you'll feel like your the one going crazy and that it's probably you who has the issues. But the toxic person is good at playing the victim. But they eventually point the finger at you.
I've had the misfortune to have to go through a toxic relationship and I hope this article prevents anyone else from having to go through this. The toxic relationship will have constant arguments. The toxic will probably argue with you while you sleep. But the toxic person will say they love you and need you. I don't know about you but that's not love. Love isn't yelling at a person to force them to love you more. Love doesn't work that way. As human beings we are a complicated species. I know deep down inside we are all a little lost in some way or another.
The lies are constant.
You will also think your going crazy because of the amount of lies they will tell. Often times leaving you confused because they are slowly manipulating your way of thinking. You will have a hard time keeping up with their stories because usually liars can not keep things strait in their minds. It is almost like a Jedi mind trick. So be strong mentally so they don't trick into believing their lies.
I hope this article helps you in not falling in a toxic relationship. It's hard to trust people now days when it comes to your feelings and heart. It's a tricky situtation because as humans we are all unpredictable. And relationships can be hard. But remember the saying "If you have to force it. It probably is shit."