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8 Things NEVER To Say To Your Girlfriend

Updated on July 15, 2011
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Every person has that thing that sets them off. It's just one or two things that will put them instantly on the warpath. However, as a member of the female gender there are some of those "little things" we all have in common that turn us from sugar and spice to anger and malice. Through some research and experience as well I have complied a few of those things into this list. I assure you that saying any of these things will make your girl bite your head off. My advice, study these and don't, under ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, say these to or near your female counterpart: if you do, it is at your own risk.

That chick is hot

She already will notice when you check out another girl's chest, if you say anything it just makes it worse. Women already have enough physical issues that we don't need any help giving ourselves reasons to feel ugly. To be honest she probably knows that you think some other girls are hot but she may like to think that she is the hottest girl you know. If you know any better you won't give her reason to think otherwise. If she doesn't like herself it will be miserable for you too.

I don't like your friend(s)

If she likes her friends then it should be obvious why you shouldn't say this but some guys don't get it. I understand, girls will say who they don't like of your friends but you can't talk about her friends. You just can't. This goes for her sister or mom or aunt or any other female in her life. This is even more important if you swear. As soon as you call her friend a bitch she will instantly be on the defensive. You don't want to go there, you really don't.

You look like crap

It would seem obvious not to say this but it isn't that simple. Because this is a common phrase you may slip and say it to your lady. She will likely get upset unless she really really feels like crap. Then again even if she feels like crap she might have tried not to look like crap but you just pointed it out. If you really want to know what's wrong just ask what's wrong instead. You are less likely to make a subconscious statement about her looks that way.

Any negative comment on physical appearance

We all know some women grow unibrows or mustaches or some of them are just plain hairy. Don't comment. She may need a manicure or to get that bunion scraped off her foot. Don't comment. If you think she needs a tan, don't comment. If you are leaning in for the kiss and you get a glimpse of the girl's 'stache either get over it or get out. Women do enough primping and preparation for everyday to know these little things that you think you're the first one to notice. Waxing hurts ok, the spa is expensive, and some other things are plain time consuming. Beauty is pain is not just a hyperbolic saying, it is often true. Your girlfriend or wife has probably already decided her beauty limits, don't push it. If you're willing to walk into a spa and get your back waxed then MAYBE you can ask her to accompany you.

Any negative comment on clothing

There is a difference between reminding your girlfriend that you are going to a black tie event and telling her you don't like her outfit. Again we already have self esteem issues we don't need you to add on. We put time, effort, and money into our appearance. From the messy bed head to the glam diva the girl did not just roll out of bed, believe me I know. Whatever it is that she is wearing, she put some work into and you saying you don't like it is a comment you can keep to yourself. If she asks answer at your own peril. If you piss her off she may just not want to go and then you have a bigger problem on your hands.

Source

You're overreacting

If you think she is overreacting just think it don't say it. This is kind of a tricky one for several reasons. She may know she is overreacting and that is probably why she is telling you. She wants to vent and she was holding it in and since she trusts you she is now venting to you just to get it off her chest. In that case just listen, when you try to give advice she will probably agree with you because she already knew the situation was crazy. On the other hand she may be venting and really be that passionate about whatever it is. If that girl in the office next to her was wearing the same dress and it just burns her to know that she wore that on the same day just to spite her then nod your head and listen (or at least pretend). As soon as you say overreacting you have turned her anger or frustration to you. If it already was on you then maybe you should try a different approach next time.

Can you make me a sammich?

If you actually use the word sammich which is supposedly funny now that is even worse. This goes hand in hand with any questions in that group like "What's for dinner?" or "Can you make something else?" NO! If you want something else you should make it yourself. Not only are you insinuating that she should be partaking in some 1950s gender role but you also just insulted her cooking. Those women in the kitchen jokes may have been funny for a little while but they got old fast. Plus if you feel like you can just ask for a sandwich anytime you want one then you better be prepared to take out the trash anytime she asks. I think that is a fair trade off.

Are you on your period?

This is the end all be all of bad things to say to your girlfriend or wife. If you weren't fighting before you said it you will be for sure after. We don't like when you try to find a reason for our seemingly irrational anger. We have been to health class too and it seems like all that guys remember is that girls have mood swings during their periods. Two things about that: First, that is not always true and second, if it is true for your girl you have now opened a can of emotional, hormonal worms that you have to deal with.

Let me explain why that question makes our blood boil. That question says that you think whatever she was just talking about is the spontaneous result of her being on her period. Basically you just said "You're being irrational so it must be your period talking." To be honest that is kind of offensive. It seems like you were going to disregard whatever she was saying as mindless girl chatter. On top of that if you happen to be right now you pissed her off because she is fulfilling a stereotype thus giving you reason to assume you are right the next time you want to ask that question. That question digs a hole you absolutely can not get out of. There is no back track, you will just have to clench your teeth and be ready for the storm of anger.

On the other hand...

Of course words are not all any conversation is about. It isn't always what you say but how you say it as well. None of these are grounds for break up they are just general hotspots for the general female population. Then again if you know your female counterpart then, you likely already know her limits. Go with what you know but if you know nothing try at least not to go with what's written directly above...

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    • profile image

      James 21 months ago

      You know what i say? Dont speak to me when youre on your period.

    • profile image

      adam 3 years ago

      Don't tiptoe around your gf right. All this talk about equality is undermined by posts like this, saying women can only be treated in a certain way and so on. If she truly loves you then she'll forgive you for saying stuff like this, even if it takes a bit of time. So don't be afraid to speak your mind, because your missus certainly isn't.

    • crystolite profile image

      Emma 3 years ago from Houston TX

      Nice one, i've made one of this mistakes in the past, but she never took it to be anything serious...

    • profile image

      Ant36mafia 5 years ago

      Not really most of those are false u can ask your gf if she is on her period most women let you know so u don't upset them when there pms'ing you can also ask your gf to make you food if she cares about you she will do anything for you as well as asking any of those questions

    • profile image

      mike 5 years ago

      That's all true and theyy do help out allot thanks

    • profile image

      KMD 5 years ago

      So glad i don't make mistakes like these. da only mistakes i've made is dat "you've got light moustache", but she didn't mind. she said dat "hmm.i noe. dats wat every1 says anyway. i don't care". nd den i said: "but still you look so cute".

    • profile image

      Jeff 5 years ago

      You look like crap? WOW never knew that was a negative comment. I'll keep that one in mind.

    • profile image

      Ashleigh 6 years ago

      I am a girl and I just wanted to help some of you guys out. If you want to say a girl is hot DON'T look the girl up and down with big eyes before you say it. If you see that she is hot look at her quickly and you can say "she has nice eyes or that dress is pretty." I wouldn't get annoyed by that even though I know what you are thinking. If she looks like crap say 'hey are you feeling okay?' If she is being bitchy don't even THINK about saying are you on your period!! Say 'what's going on or are you feeling okay? did I do something?' once you say those things she will instantly feel bad for going off on you since you are being so understanding. If she doesn't calm down after you say these things then she might just want attention and you might want to keep an eye on her because she might just be crazy as hell. Good luck. Any guy reading how not to make their GF mad is probably an okay guy.

    • profile image

      Nymisis 6 years ago

      Wow,Sux to be some of you guys ... I've been married to the same woman for 22 years now .. yep, I've said just about everything on that list at one point or another. sometimes twice in the same sentence .. and ya ... i've had to dodge a plate or two .. but there isn't a day go by i don't let her know i love her,and i think she's nuts.... but she's my lunitic and that's just all there is to it.

    • profile image

      Rob 6 years ago

      i'm going to ask my gf for a sammich as soon as i see her.

      "I need a sammich b*$ch!"

      Then sit back and wait for the fireworks! ... and possibly a sammich .. after she's calmed down :)

    • highthoughts profile image

      highthoughts 6 years ago from Boston, Ma

      There are just so many things not to say. Where do you begin?

    • profile image

      Star Pixie 6 years ago

      I don't mind if my man don't like my friends. I can't stand his best friend. If he says some girl is hot, I would PREFER he say it in a more delicate way: "She's very pretty" sounds much nicer, and if it's true I'll agree. Nothing wrong with saying a fellow female is pretty, the word "hot" sounds like he just wants to give her a hump. I'm not sure which is more offensive, my man saying she's hot, or my man disrespecting a fellow female by belittling her to a sex object!

      My man would NEVER dare tell me I'm over reacting. HE'S THE KING of over-reacting!

    • itsoksam profile image

      itsoksam 6 years ago from UAE

      Incredible work!!

    • janikon profile image

      Stuart A Jeffery 6 years ago from Toronto, Ontario

      hilarious, but very true - any straight guy should pay heed to your words.

    • profile image

      shell bell (a girl) 6 years ago

      if u are going to break up with her do not under anny cercomstanses tell her in a text she will call nd call nd call asking why o why and while dateing don't corect her unless she has asked u to and try to stay a romantic as possible un less ur not a romantic gye but if u arnt romantic at least do something romantic evry once and a while ivan if its u just cooking a good dinn er with a roze but don't change urself for her it will just end in a depressing break up or evan a devorce stay who u are

    • gabby0506 profile image

      gabby0506 6 years ago from Bangalore

      I have had worst fights when i told my girl friend that she over reacts!!

      And one more thing-Your friend(female) is hot!!

    • Courtney L J profile image

      Courtney L J 6 years ago

      hahahahahah so true

    • Nicole Winter profile image

      Nicole A. Winter 6 years ago from Chicago, IL

      This is such a fun hub, Parchessey! Naomi's comments really resonated with me, as well as Dardia's. If you're so dense as to chalk up any emotional response to: "Oh, she must be on her period," it gets processed as: "Gee, I can't express myself without sounding like an over-reactive twat, thanks, hon!" A lot of it is respect. The SO used to tell me all the time that I have *too* many thoughts in my head... lately his tactic has switched to the "Are you on your period?," train of thought. Honestly... it's degrading. I realize that as a woman I am irrational, moody and occasionally downright insane, but here's a clue for you men: You made us that way! Every time you dismiss something we say, point out a more attractive woman, treat us like we're subservient to your needs, you feed the kind of emotional reactions you're looking to avoid! My favorite thing the SO can say to me when I'm on a rant or rave? "How can I help?" Works like a charm.

    • Dardia profile image

      Darlene Yager 6 years ago from Michigan

      Wonderful, fun hub! I think most women are like this. At least when they are young. Men are so insensitive that they don't think anything of talking this way.

    • Naomi Rose Welty profile image

      Naomi Rose Welty 6 years ago from Savannah, GA

      Moses, you are so right. For instance, instead of "you look like crap," how about, "would you like a cup of tea or a snuggle?" And hey, guys, "snuggle" means... snuggle, not something else! Women really appreciate getting hugs, etc. with no strings attached.

    • deerawan profile image

      deerawan 6 years ago

      one another word you need to avoid "I don't love you" :p

    • registerdomains profile image

      registerdomains 6 years ago from India

      Good article. Got some tips..Thank you.

    • iwritegood profile image

      iwritegood 6 years ago

      There's a lot of redundancy in your article; nonetheless, a good article.

    • profile image

      Moses 6 years ago

      Boils down to hurtful things. She won't leave you because you hurt her but that doesn't mean it's ok. And don't be so dense to think your only other option is to shut up either. Use your power for good not evil, and don't be a butt head, butt head.

    • Naomi Rose Welty profile image

      Naomi Rose Welty 6 years ago from Savannah, GA

      What it boils down to is not devaluing her. I've heard it said that women want to be loved and men want to be respected. Well, it's pretty hard to feel loved when you're being disrespected: "She's hot," "you're overreacting," etc. And just because a woman doesn't bite your head off for one of these, doesn't mean she's okay with it. She might be unwilling to complain for now, but the relationship is being damaged and she might just leave one day.

    • .josh. profile image

      .josh. 6 years ago

      Too bad I hadn't come across this last nite--made the mistake of using the 'You're overreacting' line, and paid dearly for it.

      You learn, I suppose...

      Hilarious hub. Thanks for the tips!

    • profile image

      dj 6 years ago

      @jj Agreed.

      "I understand, girls will say who they don't like of your friends but you can't talk about her friends. You just can't." The last sentence is golden - "You just can't express your own opinion! You're simply not allowed!"

      Any girl that says that to me, and talks about my friends, I would pack her stuff myself and show her the door! :)

    • profile image

      jj 6 years ago

      this is crap

    • profile image

      zohaib 6 years ago

      I've almost said all of them to my gf but she is with me because she loves me truly

    • profile image

      wmn R confused 6 years ago

      wow, thts my exact convo

      are you on your period, you're over reacting, i'm hungry fix me a sandmich phatty, and change tht top you look like crap. i can't stand your friends, hope your not inviting them over, but the one from the sportsbar was hott

    • istephan profile image

      istephan 6 years ago from Los Angeles

      LOL..! I've been saying all of these to my Gf and she's agree with me at times, I don't remember she's angry anytime. so the most important thing is time and situation which you have to consider to tell any single word to your Gf or Wife and she'd definitely be fine for sure.

    • MobileSofwareEng profile image

      MobileSofwareEng 6 years ago from United States

      very nice

    • profile image

      cliff 6 years ago

      "A thousand words will not leave so deep an impression as one deed." - Henrik Ibsen

      So say nothing, just buy her some flowers!

    • profile image

      This 6 years ago

      Stop, stop it everyone. No more jokes about menstruation. Period.

    • profile image

      oh snap 6 years ago

      buuuurn!

      & I agree

    • tom hellert profile image

      tom hellert 6 years ago from home

      Sometime - "Hello dear-" can be the wrong thing..\

      TH

    • bogusroy profile image

      bogusroy 6 years ago from Crescent City Florida

      So how many years does it take us guys to figure this out?

    • profile image

      bern 6 years ago

      what if my girl already had read this? would she understand if i say "you look like crap"?

    • profile image

      bern 6 years ago

      what if my girl already had read this? would she understand if i say "you look like crap"?

    • Filly2 profile image

      Filly2 6 years ago from -

      Love it soo true!

    • JDove-Miller profile image

      JDove-Miller 6 years ago from YOUNGSVILLE

      Too funny. I don't think I'd break up with anyone who said either of these to me however.

    • CWanamaker profile image

      CWanamaker 6 years ago from Arizona

      Haha these are great. The funny part is that these are all true. If you say them, your girlfriend will definitely get mad.

    • profile image

      Ed K. 6 years ago

      Mostly, all painfully obvious, honestly, its less what you say, more how you say it.. don't think i'd EVER tell someone i care about they "Look like crap" maybe "You don't look so well, ya all right?" Negative comments on physical appearance.. if you even think to say anything negative about them in that way, why are you in a bloody relationship with em? among the "women in kitchen" stereotypes, only "What's for dinner?" is a safe one under certain circumstances. "Don't like your friend" should be reserved for when you see something horrid in their friend that they cant, or when you feel she is being used by them, sometimes it just needs to be said to maintain good communication. and "Shes hot/pretty/attractive" is something you should only say if your girl is bi, hell, she may want you to point her out. all in all, some women are like sleeper agents, key words can, and often WILL set her off, bad. best thing to do, is just sit back, be quiet, don't let it get to you, and most importantly, pay attention, if shes angry let her vent, present zen-like quality, and you MAY earn respect. just think before you speak.

    • clintonb profile image

      clintonb 6 years ago from Adelaide, Australia

      Lol.That was a good one.

    • profile image

      Ventilation 6 years ago

      How about instead of period, filling in the word crack?

      Since when do men have to keep in mind an be cautiaus about so many things. It looks to me in this story we men have to keep an eye out on anything we can and do. Just because women seem to overreact in the most bizar kind of situations and about the strangest subjects.

      Just my 5 cents lol

    • profile image

      Rayv 6 years ago

      i honestly would most likely laugh at all of that

    • Alexander Props profile image

      Alexander Props 6 years ago

      I think I've said all of this things and I mostly agree with you :)

    • profile image

      Wade 6 years ago

      seems have points but not always true, would you say to your friends, family, anyone else that "U look like a crap"?

    • profile image

      JJ 6 years ago

      (@ Srry) You are going to get dumped

    • profile image

      srry 6 years ago

      Sweet I'm gonna try using all of these some day.

    • zanin profile image

      zanin 6 years ago from London, England

      'Are you on your...?' Is definitely not good. Love the post. Voted up. Nina