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How a Good Woman Can Find a Good Man

Updated on October 23, 2018
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Angelladywriter has featured a variety of artists during her television and writing career. She is a graduate from Widener University.

A Good Man is Hard to Find

Yesterday, I attended a wedding anniversary. The couple decided to celebrate their 14th. First of all I thought, "Why the 14th? That's not a designated year you would celebrate," I thought. This couple really did a nice job by renting a beautiful location starting with appetizers and cocktails. After about an hour, we went into the ballroom to a full course dinner and guess what? This event was his idea which he paid for in full. There were no designated seating and we did not have to make any donations or pay for the event. Yes, some people do charge their children, friends or relatives to put on this type of event for a wedding anniversary. Regardless, as the evening continued you could see the reason we were really there. That woman truly loves her man and that man adores his wife. Based on this love they will find any date, time or location to celebrate their love. No, this is not some overly emotional story with no meaning or content. So please, continue to read.

I watched this couple as they expressed how they can be in a room alone and crack themselves up in laughter. Even my daughter agreed that when she visits this couple, they will be in the room by themselves just laughing together as if they have a room filled with other people and a comedian. What can we learn from this couple? That laughter should definitely be a part of a man and woman's relationship because it truly makes them closer. I watched them as they danced like two teenagers on a first date. Nothing fancy, but just the kind of closeness that every woman desires. No, I am not jealous nor did I experience some deceitful desire. I am writing about this couple because as a God fearing woman, I love to see a man living up to his role as husband and father. At the same time, I saw a woman subjecting herself to her man with pride. Yes, I did say that bad word, "subjecting." I have learned over the years after careful study of God's word the Bible, that being in subjection is no big deal because all of us are servants and in subjection to our Grand Creator and his precious son, Jesus. All of us have a head that we are subjected to. The head of the man is Christ Jesus. Once a woman is married, she is the only one with an imperfect head which is her husband. Jehovah God, with his ephemeral, unfathomable qualities, is the only one without a head because he is the Creator of us all.

The reason I included in the title of this article the words, "a good man," is that there were plenty of good men watching this event unfold. Men that are fine examples as heads of their households. Men who serve as spiritual leaders in the Christian congregation. Fathers of children who do not have sex until they are married. Men who study the Bible with their families and work hard to support them. These qualities may sound like something in a fairy-tale. This is the type of man this woman was married to, who celebrated their 14th anniversary. These other good men that were in attendance, are decisive and humble like Jesus. They listen to their wives, have discussions with their children and show respect for the family arrangement. No, they are not perfect but live their lives based 1Timothy 3: 1-7. The counsel there is taken literally. These men love Jehovah God, his son Jesus Christ, their wives, children, and neighbors. They teach their families to go out just as Jesus did and tell others about the wonderful promises for our future based on God's Kingdom. "What a man, what a man, what a mighty good man!"

Now, the question is, can we find a good man and is a good man hard to find? Ladies, it truly depends on where you are looking. If you look in the cesspool of men, that is exactly what you will find is a man that lives in the cesspool. His mind constantly focuses on sex, especially before marriage. He will come over as one woman said on a recent radio program, "My man comes over to have sex with me but he cannot shovel my snow." Many women complain that their men do not take care of their children financially. Some men curse at their women calling them degrading names. Ladies, Almighty God tells us explicitly how we should be treated as wives and mothers of their children. Learning to love yourself enough, to know that you deserve respect and appreciation of that man. When we don't hold them accountable to these standards in the Bible, they can treat us any way they want. Remember, a truly God-fearing man is a good man. If a man claims that he fears and loves God, he will not cheat on his wife. Tiger Woods may need to learn that the only way he can truly remain faithful to his wife, is that he learns the truth from the Bible which will help him set a fine example as husband and father. Individuals who try to fight sex additions, must obtain professional help, read God's word daily and apply it. We must also remember that if we have found a good man, we must be a good woman who also applies our creator's principles at Proverbs 31, where a woman watches over the "goings-on of her household." Her beauty must not just be pleasing to the eyes, but her inner beauty due to the love of God makes her pleasing to the heart of family and friends. Yes, it is not easy to find a good man but if you are a good God-fearing woman, half the work is done. If you also are learning to love yourself as the greatest love of all, this will help you search for what is best for you. Once again, to find a good man you must be a good woman and stay out of the cesspool of men. Most important of all, work on yourself first, and then it will be easier for you to draw individuals who are attempting to improve or enhance their lives for the better.

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The majority of good men are christians.

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    • Angelladywriter profile imageAUTHOR

      Claudette Coleman Carter 

      4 years ago from Media, Pennsylvania

      Ding Dong, what was a nice conclusion you developed, "humans are capable of a lot of good. You just need to look in the right places." Because we are made in the image of our Grand Creator Jehovah, who is the source of nothing but love, justice, wisdom and power; we imitate these wonderful qualities and can display them to others. May each of us work diligently at being peaceable and loving toward each other, in these critical times we are living in.

    • profile image

      Ding Dong 

      4 years ago

      When soldiers fight together, can someone explain why is there a need to "cover a team mate in a bad situation without even thinking ? everybody has different capacities in what they would do, but most would certainly put themselves in harms way to protect a comrade or a fallen. this is natural and can be found in civilian situations as well. I despised humans for a long time but I realized I was looking through wrong glasses. humans are capable of a lot of good. You just need to look in the right places.

    • Angelladywriter profile imageAUTHOR

      Claudette Coleman Carter 

      5 years ago from Media, Pennsylvania

      Hello Burned,

      Your comments were interesting. I am truly sorry you feel that way. Whoever hurt you, please don't allow them to control your life by maintaining resentment or anger against people in general. I have friends of all races that would give their life for me and I would do the same for them because we try to walk in Jesus' footsteps.

      We also must remember, we make our own individual decisions because we have "free will," given to us by our Heavenly Father. Yet when things go wrong we blame Jehovah for our own personal decisions just as Adam did in the Garden of Eden when he said, "The woman whom you gave to be with me, she gave me fruit from the tree, so I ate it." (Genesis 3:12) We have to start taking responsibility for our own decisions. Negativity, draws negativity. When you are positive and encouraging, you draw the same type of people around you. As a middle age woman, I have truly learned that in my life. I refuse to allow anyone to hold me prisoner, in a state of resentment or hatred.

      Almighty God loves you. Find his people so that you can be loved as well. None of us are perfect so we make mistakes and mistreat each other. That is why forgiveness is so vital because it sets you free from the bondages of complaints and resentment. Thanks for writing me and take care.

    • profile image


      5 years ago

      Sorry folks, you are all wrong

      First forget about your loving jehovah, he couldn't care less that's why you get stuck with a bad one or percieve the world is ''worse''

      Second, the quote that ''times have changed'' is wrong where this subject is concerned. If you married a scumbag first then you rid the world of this person, the good ones were picked up early and wont be let go of. The percentage of scumbag versus good will still be the same.

      Thirdly, you have met tens of thousands of people in your life, how many of these are friends that you can rely on 100%? 1 in 5000? Well that's the ratio to find a decent spouse who ticks all the boxes too.

      Good and compatible people to find is like winning a million type lottery. Your chances are remote even when you are young and the chances being higher then. The world is chock full of scumbags. So forget it, always!!! and find an alternative to pass your time in life instead.

    • profile image


      5 years ago

      To Angelladywriter, thank you very much for your support.

    • Angelladywriter profile imageAUTHOR

      Claudette Coleman Carter 

      5 years ago from Media, Pennsylvania

      Franko, I am sorry to hear about your dilemma. Times have changed and some people are becoming more selfish and self centered. As individuals, we must come to know the true meaning of love for ourselves. Then we can share this love with others, including a good marriage mate. This can only be discovered by getting to know our Grand Creator, who is the essence of true love. When we accomplish this goal, individuals including good women will draw to you because they will see qualities of love being demonstrated and practiced by you. There are still a lot of good women out there. Continue to think positive and focus on the wonderful qualities that Jesus demonstrated while here on earth. Imitating these qualities, will prepare you to be a dynamic husband and father.

      For more information on "The Secret of Family Happiness," go to to order your free publication.

    • profile image


      5 years ago

      To Angelladywriter, well i am telling the truth since i have come across so many very mean women nowadays. and when i had a woman curse at me at one time for trying to start a conversation with her, that didn't make any sense at all. but then again, i certainly do realize that there are much more Gay Women nowadays that do hate us men which does make it very hard for us Straight Men looking to meet a good normal woman today.

    • Angelladywriter profile imageAUTHOR

      Claudette Coleman Carter 

      6 years ago from Media, Pennsylvania

      Hi Franko,

      Sorry that you feel the way you do about certain women today. Please try to understand; there are still some good women out here today who are very supportive of their husbands because they look to Christ Jesus as their example to follow in the footsteps of. These women are not just beautiful in appearance which is pleasing to the eyes but they have inner beauty that pleases the heart. They are this way because of their love for their Heavenly Father Jehovah. The only way we can become a good mate for anyone, is that we must look at the examples of love demonstrated by Almighty God and his Son, Jesus. This recommendation is given for each of us at (1 Peter 2:21) which states, "In fact, to this course you were called, because even Christ suffered for you leaving you a model for you to follow his steps closely."

      In order for us to find a good marriage mate, we have to be one ourselves, displaying that inner Christ like beauty. For more information on how to become a good marriage mate, go to

    • profile image


      6 years ago

      i am a straight man that had to comment on this too, and it is certainly very hard for me to connect with the right woman again for me. there are so many very mean women out there nowadays that just don't know how to talk to us men anymore, and that certainly makes it very difficult for us. i hate going out as it is, and i seem to come across the women with their attitude problem today. it is very hard just to start a conversation with a woman that i would like to get too know, and she will walk away from me. i can't blame myself at all, since i did not do anything wrong to begin with. women have certainly changed over the years, since the fifties and sixties when they were much better educated and very committed to their men. i wish that we could have the women like June Cleaver and Donna Reed today, and many of the women did accept their men for who they were and they didn't have to be rich either.

    • Angelladywriter profile imageAUTHOR

      Claudette Coleman Carter 

      7 years ago from Media, Pennsylvania

      Hi Sunny,

      I totally agree about some Christian women who are single, somewhat happy but lonely. Please remember that our Heavenly Father Jehovah, never leaves you. We can always talk to him in prayer. The Apostle Paul also recommended at 1Corinthians chapter 7, that if you are able to remain single, "there is plenty to do in the work of the Lord." But if not and you feel the need to get married that is good also. Gaining God's approval truly is the most important thing. If you do decide to marry this chapter also recommends that you marry, "only in the Lord." This will help your relationship to be balanced as the two of you serve God together. Sometimes whether we are single or married, we can still be lonely and disappointed at times. Having that personal relationship with God, gives you a refuge when you do have problems.

      For more information and suggestions on maintaining happiness whether married or single, order a free copy at of the publication "The Secret of Family Happiness." I pray this will be of some help to you in your future pursuits, whether you stay single or get married.

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      There are many Christian women who are single and yet

      somewhat happy but lonely.

      Some feel confused and some angry because they keep meeting

      the wrong kind in church and out.

      Then are some that it doesn't matter so it is said.

    • Angelladywriter profile imageAUTHOR

      Claudette Coleman Carter 

      8 years ago from Media, Pennsylvania

      Hi Robin,

      Sorry that you feel that the world does not have any good men. I truly have seen some in the last few years. It may have taken them years to mature, just as it takes most of us because we are imperfect. Please remember also, that a man who beats on a woman and watches porn, is not a real man but a bully. Unless, each of us learn and apply what our beautiful Creator has taught us on how to treat each other whether male or female, we will continue to bully and act with bad behavior. Reading the Bible and applying it, has truly been the best teacher for me and my family.

    • profile image


      8 years ago

      Oh stop you can meet a man at a church.He be a Sunday scholl teacher ect. But then when you go home after being married to him awhile he starts beating you.Or be married to a Bible thumper and go to church as a family but he rejects is own child! And is addicted to porn! It does not matter where you meet them they are all the same.This country has gone to the dogs.Because the very ones(THE MEN) that are suppose to lead this country,their children and wives have gone to the dogs.Men are suppose to be the leaders.They are leading even their own children straight to hell! So NO it does not matter..


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