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Overcoming shyness and Social Phobia

Updated on March 2, 2013

Shyness is a personality trait where some people view it as negative and others positive. I try not to think of it as either, since its just a personality. However many shy individuals, may view this as a negative point, since it can lead to social phobia some may become depressed and try their hardest to change this. Some people grow out of shyness, and others lose it through environment change and/or surroundings. But there are those who will have that personality all their life.

The main reason why shy people dislike their personality is because of the social phobia issue, many think they are missing out due to their personality. For example being with a group of people may often feel like they are being outspoken or "drowned" out by the more confident and louder speakers in the group. The biggest thing to remember here is that even though you are shy, you must have had a attribute which people liked to be in the group in the first place. Shy, quiet, laid back attitudes are qualities that many people like and respect even though it doesn't stand out. For every group of loud talkers there need to be an equal number of calmer quieter talking to maintain a good balance.

Building Relationships

People may think shyness is hindering them from relationship. e.g. "The funny loud mouth guys are getting all the girls (or boys)". Having a shy personality, you wouldn't get along in relationship with those type of people anyway, no matter how hard you tried. It would be a completely different type of partner who would prefer a quiet, shy guy. Not particularly a shy girl/women herself but someone who favors not to have the "challenging/argumentative type partner.

Being the quieter person in a group can actually make you stand out in this respect, since certain people (especially the opposite sex) become curious as to what you are about and would like to find out more. This is the time to shine, since shy people are usually very quiet in larger groups but can show their full color in one-on-one situations. Shy people tend to maintain relationships with either sex for much longer than people with outgoing personality types.


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