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Busting Out from Prudish to Erotic

Updated on June 18, 2016
"Bad girls ain't no good but good girls ain't no fun."  "I don't have an attitude problem. You have a problem with my attitude, and that's not my problem."  -- Unknown
"Bad girls ain't no good but good girls ain't no fun." "I don't have an attitude problem. You have a problem with my attitude, and that's not my problem." -- Unknown | Source

Being a published author is something I have always dreamed of. All my life, I have survived various negative environments by living a fantasy life. My virtual world is rich in characters, biographies, plot lines, and serial stories. I have written many of them, and have actually published a few; you can find some right here on HubPages. I am not crazy; this idiosyncrasy, in fact, has saved me from mental madness.

I have always assumed my first book would be about some of these stories. However, another project has taken up most of my writing time over the past three years, due to someone commissioning me to research and write several articles. Because many of the compositions were about the same subject, I had enough to compile them into a book. At long last, I have finally accomplished my goal of being published, and with numerous revisions, I have not one book but three. What are the topics of my books? SEX! I can’t believe this!

So why would I write books about sex education – especially since until recent years I was basically a prude? This is for several reasons. First, I was able to write those compositions because I was hiding “under the cloak of anonymity”; thus, I was able to be not so squeamish regarding the subject. In the process of researching and writing, I realized out of all the mistakes I’ve made in life, relationship - related ones aren’t on the list. Some of you may find this strange, considering the proliferation of single mothers with a ghetto background like mine. The reason I was able to escape such a fate is, I attended a Christian high school where a wonderful teacher (who was not the least bit prudish) taught us students all we needed to know, and provided a value system that prevented us from making unwise decisions. I decided it would be a good idea share with the world the knowledge I was taught in high school, because it is greatly needed. I am living breathing proof that people make the best decisions when they’re well informed.

It is spring fever. That is what the name of it is. And when you have it, you don't quite know what it is you do want, but it just fairly makes your heart ache, you want it so! -Mark Twain
It is spring fever. That is what the name of it is. And when you have it, you don't quite know what it is you do want, but it just fairly makes your heart ache, you want it so! -Mark Twain | Source

Second, because being older and wiser has led me to become less rigid and fearful. I grew up in an environment where sex was ugly and men were a threat. I have long held the belief that good men are rare, and I was supposed to go after what few ones I could find. I was a MISERABLE failure in this venture.

Since becoming enlightened, I have learned that most men are really wonderful. Being past the typical dating age, I now flirt indiscriminately with them, regardless of whether or not they’re relationship material. As a result, I was once asked out on a date by a boy one third my age!

Third, having travelled and lived in various places, and studying many cultures, I’ve discovered the whole world is not Oakland, CA (I’m still learning!). Because of this knowledge, I am able to deal with issues that developed because of what I was forced to live with when I was younger and dumber. Facing these issues has enabled me to see matters from a completely different point of view – and a far more positive one! The world is not necessarily going to hell in a handbasket. Sure, some things are worse, but most of the changes that have happened in recent decades are improvements. That’s why you’re able to read this on the internet!

There are other reasons, but I’ll skip those for now. So here they are – the fruits of my wisdom and labor!

Wage Peace Between The Sexes (Sugar Version): A Guide to Healthy and Wholesome Sensual Relationships for Youth
Wage Peace Between The Sexes (Sugar Version): A Guide to Healthy and Wholesome Sensual Relationships for Youth

This is a facts-of-life book for youth aged 12 to 15. The 8 chapters explain in detail the basics of healthy and wholesome relationships, pitfalls to avoid, sexually transmitted diseases, birth control, and money management. The illustrations are in black and white. This book is also available in kindle format; in it, the illustrations are in full color.

 
Romeo and Juliet "Love is like heaven, but it can hurt like hell." ~ Anonymous
Romeo and Juliet "Love is like heaven, but it can hurt like hell." ~ Anonymous | Source

The books I wrote for youth are Wage Peace Between the Sexes (Sugar Version) for ages 12 – 15, and Wage Peace Between the Sexes (Spice Version) for ages 16 – 18. I start each chapter with a true or false quiz, and discuss those questions within the chapter. At the end, I add activities and discussions on the subject matter. Though I have aimed primarily towards a heterosexual audience, homosexuals can also apply the knowledge offered. Some of the topics my book covers are:

How to be an Alpha Male / Female. I’m not referring to domineering he-men and bitchy women, but rather people who naturally attract dates like magnets and have fun doing it. The key is to genuinely like the opposite gender. How do you overcome your personal suspicions and achieve that? By focusing on their positive aspects. What do you like best about them? Also figure out what you like the least, and avoid situations where that’s an issue. Ultimately, men and women are more alike than different, and we all want pretty much the same things, so rather than resort to negative stereotypes about them, give them the benefit of the doubt and treat them with respect.

Where to meet great men / women. This is not as difficult as it seems. The best way is to do the things you love with like-minded people. I list several excellent venues towards this end. I also name numerous ideas for dates that will help couples truly get to know one another.

Common social pitfalls to avoid, such as giving inappropriate gifts, going steady and becoming intimate too soon in the relationship, stealing someone else’s partner, slut-shaming, “settling” for someone who you know is inappropriate but you’re afraid you can’t find anyone else, clinging to someone who is unavailable, abusive partners, date rape, drugs, and alcohol. This chapter also addresses homosexuality, acquiring and screening friends through joining social groups, recognizing cults, and the use of erotica / pornography.

"Time is too slow for those who wait, too swift for those who fear, too long for those who grieve, to short for those who rejoice; but for those who love, time is eternity." ~ Henry Van Dyke
"Time is too slow for those who wait, too swift for those who fear, too long for those who grieve, to short for those who rejoice; but for those who love, time is eternity." ~ Henry Van Dyke | Source

A full discussion on sexually transmitted diseases, the prevalence of each, the different ways they are contracted, common symptoms, and how they are treated.

A complete guide to birth control, how each method is used, the advantages of choosing that method, the disadvantages, and their degree of effectiveness.

A chapter on money management, since the #1 subject couples fight about is money. In this chapter, I discuss the 3 major ways to earn a living, advice on how to acquire skills (such as taking courses in high school that will enable you to earn a sustainable wage) , and approaches on saving and investing money so people don’t spend all their vital energy worrying about finances. Included is a link on how to make the most of a college education, so those who choose to pursue that route don’t wind up as yet another statistic. I also explain the importance of obtaining the proper insurances, how to budget wisely, and what is involved on leaving an inheritance.

How to make a marriage last. Divorce statistics are actually far lower than the media would have you believe; same with the demographics on infidelity. I list attributes people should have in order to make an ideal marriage partner, and traits to avoid / overcome. This chapter also includes important factors to discuss after finding a partner they want for a lifetime – BEFORE marriage.

Have you ever broken loose from a lifelong shackling belief?

See results
Wage Peace Between The Sexes (Spice Version): A Guide to Healthy and Wholesome Sensual Relationships for Youth
Wage Peace Between The Sexes (Spice Version): A Guide to Healthy and Wholesome Sensual Relationships for Youth

This is the same as the Sugar Version, but includes an additional chapter describing sex and dealing with its common issues. It is for youth aged 16 - 18. The pictures are black and white; in the kindle version, they are full color.

 

The Spice Version contains an additional chapter on the basics on sex, and how to deal with common problems. I discuss the benefits of a positive erotic life and ways to achieve it, as well as addressing the adverse effects of psychological dysfunction and physical diseases. The activities at the end of this chapter include discussions on the Madonna / Whore syndrome so common in Western society, the possible causes behind it, and ways other cultures have dealt with such a dilemma.

If You Like Sex, Read This Book!
If You Like Sex, Read This Book!

This book is “Wage Peace Between the Sexes” for adults. A large book (8 ½ by 11 inches, containing over 400 pages), it is loaded with sexual information presented in an honest and beneficial manner, and beautiful erotic images. This book will help couples, whether they are new to sex or older and jaded, live a healthy and wholesome sexual lifestyle! In the print version, the images are black and white. in the kindle version, they are in full color.

 

If You Like Sex, Read This Book! is for people 18 years old and over. It is ideal for those new to intimacy, and also those who have been in a relationship a long time and have therefore become jaded. The first half of the book is an adult version of Wage Peace Between the Sexes (Spice Version). The second half consists of nine chapters discussing various aspects of sensual living such as dance, lingerie and fashion, seduction - enhancing products to buy, gift ideas, and erotic devices. Three chapters provide a catalog on board, card, and other types of games couples can play to educate themselves about lovemaking, explaining the rules on how to play them, including additional items needed and ideas for embellishment. In the last chapter, I include movies, literature, and ideas for vacations and honeymoons. This information also entails erotic practices from countries around the world. At the end of each chapter is a list of links where to purchase the products.

Friendship is always a sweet responsibility, never an opportunity. ~ Kahil Gibran
Friendship is always a sweet responsibility, never an opportunity. ~ Kahil Gibran | Source

So, are you guys ready for an exotic, erotic adventure? If so, please check out these three titles: Wage Peace Between the Sexes: A Guide to Healthy and Wholesome Sensual Relationships for Youth (Sugar Version) and (Spice Version) and If You Like Sex, Read This Book! (Wage Peace Between the Sexes for Adults) by Ana Kolomeka. (This is my pen name; it means Andromeda in Hawaiian). You can read the first 2 chapters of the youth books and the first 3 chapters of the adult book in the Kindle versions on Amazon. Please write your thoughts, opinions, and reviews on Amazon, and in the Comments section here. Enjoy!

Sensuality is more than a Red Light District...

Update!!!

I have posted excerpts of a few chapters of Wage Peace Between the Sexes (Sugar Version)on a separate HubPages site, under my pen name Ana Kolomeka. I did it so educators can review it and decide if they want to use it in their curriculum. Here is the link; you can read it there.

http://anakolomeka.hubpages.com/

© 2014 Yoleen Lucas

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    • kenneth avery profile image

      Kenneth Avery 11 months ago from Hamilton, Alabama

      Say Yes To Life,

      Way to go! Great hub. I mean it. From the first paragraph

      to the last, what a nice story and it was founded with truth

      and colorful imagination.

      Keep up the great work.

    • Say Yes To Life profile image
      Author

      Yoleen Lucas 15 months ago from Big Island of Hawaii

      Thank you, Techygran! Knowledge really is power! My good fortune in having such a great facts of life teacher (who I dedicated all 3 books to), is the reason I was able to escape Oakland, and not pass on the dysfunction. Thanks also for your support!

    • techygran profile image

      Cynthia 15 months ago from Vancouver Island, Canada

      This is very interesting Yoleen, and flies in the face of a certain group who believe that ALL sex education should be carried out within the home. What I observed, when seeing this approach, was that sex education often did NOT take place, or only in a very skimpy, inadequate, shame-based, poorly-informed manner. Not to mention families that contain sexual abuse perpetrators, with their "investment" in not having the healthy information available to their kids. Congratulations in the research you did, and the published books! I will certainly get a hold of a copy since I am a grandma and this is a tough time for little Christian girls. God bless you in this ministry! ~Cynthia (shared)

    • Say Yes To Life profile image
      Author

      Yoleen Lucas 16 months ago from Big Island of Hawaii

      Thanks, Bill!

    • Billrrrr profile image

      Bill Russo 16 months ago from Cape Cod

      Congratulations on your drive to succeed and on the publication of your books. Best wishes for continued and even greater successes.

    • Say Yes To Life profile image
      Author

      Yoleen Lucas 16 months ago from Big Island of Hawaii

      Thanks for your comment, Nell!

    • Nell Rose profile image

      Nell Rose 16 months ago from England

      Good luck with your books! and good for you for writing under another name, it does give you so much more freedom!

    • Say Yes To Life profile image
      Author

      Yoleen Lucas 16 months ago from Big Island of Hawaii

      Thanks for reading and commenting!

    • Thelma Alberts profile image

      Thelma Alberts 16 months ago from Germany

      What an interesting hub! I want to check this book later. Thanks for sharing and good luck to your books.

    • Say Yes To Life profile image
      Author

      Yoleen Lucas 21 months ago from Big Island of Hawaii

      No, it wssn't legal. However the boy was 15, so it wasn't quite that bad (I was 47). It happened in a highly supervised summer camp, so no danger there.

      Coming from the ghetto, it was a pleasant surprise for me to discover the whole world is not Oakland. I'm still learning! Take a good look around you; things aren't that bad, are they? If they are, you can always relocate, right?

      Happy New Year to you too, Besarien!

    • Besarien profile image

      Besarien 21 months ago

      One third of your age? is that even legal? If you are approaching sixty, you are looking fine! Or was it like that precocious eight year old who always hits on his friend's moms? None of my business! Just forget I asked! Backs out of room slowly..

      Seriously, great hub! I am so happy the majority of men have exceeded your expectations. Happy New Year SY2L!

    • Say Yes To Life profile image
      Author

      Yoleen Lucas 21 months ago from Big Island of Hawaii

      Thanks!

    • kalinin1158 profile image

      Lana ZK 21 months ago from California

      Congrats Yoleen! It's a great accomplishment to be a published author, and of not one but 3 books! Well done. I know it's an enormous labor of love.

    • Say Yes To Life profile image
      Author

      Yoleen Lucas 21 months ago from Big Island of Hawaii

      I have FINALLY finished all the updates! I plan on having free downloads on all three ebooks starting January 25th. Enjoy!

    • Say Yes To Life profile image
      Author

      Yoleen Lucas 2 years ago from Big Island of Hawaii

      You guys - currently the two versions of the youth books, "Wage Peace Between the Sexes", are available in ebook format for free download. They will be free through Sunday, 10/25/15. Grab it while it's hot!

    • Say Yes To Life profile image
      Author

      Yoleen Lucas 2 years ago from Big Island of Hawaii

      I'd like to check it out sometime.

    • CatherineGiordano profile image

      Catherine Giordano 2 years ago from Orlando Florida

      I wrote "What Ifs, If Onlys, and So Whats." It is a book of essays based on my speeches.

    • Say Yes To Life profile image
      Author

      Yoleen Lucas 2 years ago from Big Island of Hawaii

      Thank you, Catherine Giordano and word55. CG - what is the name and topic of the book you wrote? word55 - one of the many fabulous features of living today is that you can change what you have printed in minutes. I have lost count of how many revisions of my books I have uploaded!

    • word55 profile image

      Word 2 years ago from Chicago

      From book author to book author, Congrats Yoleen! You must live with what you had printed for the rest of your life. I wish you much success. God bless!

    • CatherineGiordano profile image

      Catherine Giordano 2 years ago from Orlando Florida

      Congrats on the book and on your courage to live your life fully. It takes a lot of hard work to write a book. I know because i wrote one.

    • Say Yes To Life profile image
      Author

      Yoleen Lucas 2 years ago from Big Island of Hawaii

      You guys – I have just published a second edition to my book. I have retitled it, “If You Like Sex, Read This Book!” I have added an additional chapter, “Responsibility and Prevention: Avoiding Pitfalls”. It is the 3rd chapter, and you can read part of it for free on review at Amazon.

      In addition, I have published 2 youth versions of my book. They are titled, “Wage Peace Between the Sexes”. They are about half the length of the adult version, omitting the chapters about devices and other matters that don’t pertain to youth. The “Spice Version” includes a chapter that describes sex, and ways to deal with common issues. I’m going to market this book to middle and high schools, giving them a choice between the regular and spice versions. You can read the first chapter and part of the second for free on Amazon as well.

      I have updated this hub to make these new books available. Please check them out, and let me know what you think!

    • Say Yes To Life profile image
      Author

      Yoleen Lucas 2 years ago from Big Island of Hawaii

      Thanks for checking it out, jlpark!

    • jlpark profile image

      Jacqui 2 years ago from New Zealand

      Sounds awesome SayYes. Will have to look into it. Am also getting back into my book/s on the go - one day, maybe I will get to share the same type of hub!

      Like you said - your book could work for people like me as well - so when I get a chance, I'll take a look! Well done!

    • Say Yes To Life profile image
      Author

      Yoleen Lucas 2 years ago from Big Island of Hawaii

      Thanks, D.R. Alton. I was fortunate to have gone to a high school where I was very well educated on this topic. I was also lucky to have an EXCELLENT teacher.

      I am currently working on a high school edition of this book, and will market it to the high schools in my area. Wish me luck!

    • profile image

      D.R. Alton 2 years ago

      You've definitely done your research on this topic! I wish I'd read this a long time ago - it would have saved me A LOT of grief!

    • Say Yes To Life profile image
      Author

      Yoleen Lucas 3 years ago from Big Island of Hawaii

      Austinstar - sounds interesting! Do they eat gillyweed from Harry Potter IV? LOL!

      J Beers and Michelle - thanks for commenting. Hopefully my book had nothing to do with what's going on...

    • profile image

      Michelle Ma Belle from CA 3 years ago

      Please disregard the above message. You are NOT a freak! I did read your book, and greatly admire the work and research you put into it.

      I'll fill you in on my drama later. Best of luck to you!

    • profile image

      J. Beers 3 years ago

      I LOVE your book! I can't believe you know so much - you seem like such a conservative! My girlfriend couldn't read it - she thinks you're a freak! But I think it's great.

    • Austinstar profile image

      Lela 3 years ago from Somewhere in the universe

      I'll be writing an action/adventue book, hopefully in the style of Tom Clancy or James Rollins. I won't be as good as them because it's my first book ever, but I'm doing it anyway.

      It's about an oceanographic scientist that develops a way for humans to breathe seawater. The setting is Guantanamo Bay and Cuba. It will involve sunken treasure, energy resources and maybe the Russians. Who knows?

    • Say Yes To Life profile image
      Author

      Yoleen Lucas 3 years ago from Big Island of Hawaii

      Thanks, Austinstar! What is your book about?

    • Austinstar profile image

      Lela 3 years ago from Somewhere in the universe

      Sounds like an excellent book! I will go check it out. But I have to admit, I have about 20 books ahead of you on my waiting list. Plus, I'm trying to write my own book next month and year. This is a great hub too, full of good advice. I instinctively knew that 'genuinely' liking the people you want to date will go farther than just trying to "impress" them.