- Gender and Relationships
True Definition Of A Friend
What Is A Friend?
I've been thinking a lot about the true definition of a friend and what friendship really means. A "friend" of mine (who's really an associate) always seems to find the need to question if I'm really a good friend or not and if my intentions are really good. The reason that she does that is because I'm a lot different than her other friends (who really aren't her friends). She feels like I judge her when I really don't, but I do give her my opinion on different issues, and I'm very honest with her, which she's not used to. She would rather have a "friend" who will blindly agree with everything that she says and never speak their mind. That's not me! I'm a great listener, always have been, but I'm a rational person as well. I feel like if you don't want someone's opinion or advice don't start a conversation and not expect them to respond at all. Sometimes I may come off a little blunt, but never hurtful or insensitive. Not being conceited, but the people that really know me know that I'm one of the most caring, dependable people that they know, and a great listener. I've had strangers reach out to me and start talking or asking for my advice.
The past few years have really taught me a lot about who my friends are and aren't. I had to end a friendship with someone I'd known for almost 20 years because they showed me that their view on life had changed and that they no longer respected me as a person. So I've really learned the difference between a true friend and an associate. Here's what I think makes a true friend:
- A true friend will love you unconditionally, not because of what you have, how you look, who you know, or how much money you might have.
- A true friend respects you at all times.
- A true friend will lift you up and encourage you, not tear you down or stab you in the back.
- A true friend understands that friendship goes both ways, that it's give and take, not take and take some more.
- A true friend is somebody that you can talk to or call on anytime day or night and will listen to you and be there for you when you need them.
- A true friend is around whether or not things are good or not and whether or not they get married or have somebody special in their life.
- A true friend will be honest and open with you, even when it might not be what you wanted to hear or thought you might hear.
- A friend is somebody that you can trust.
- A true friend can forgive you if you do make a mistake.
- A true friend appreciates your friendship and won't take advantage of it or try to use you.
- A true friend won't question your loyalty or friendship because they recognize you as a true friend to them.
Of course nobody is perfect, I don't claim to be, but I do try to be the best friend that I can be to my true friends. With my associates I take them with a grain of salt and understand that they are who they are and that's ok too. I've come to realize that everybody isn't meant to be your friend, so it's important to know who is or isn't your friend. If you're blessed to have one good friend in your life, love them, appreciate them, and thank God for them.