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WHAT A MAN CAN'T DO FOR HIMSELF
WHAT A MAN CAN'T DO FOR HIMSELF
WHAT A MAN CANNOT DO FOR HIMSELF IN A MARIAGE
A man does everything for himself before marriage. These include washing, cooking, taking care of his immediate surroundings. No man ever got married because he wants to delegate these duties. A man begins to consider marriage when he senses the need for intimacy.
unfortunately, in many marriages today, the women have adopted the full house help job while ignoring the essence of the union. They got too busy with house hold chores while the lubricants of their marriage life are drying up without them noticing it.
In a few decades from now many marriages which were conducted in churches, I mean living churches would be heading for the rock, why? the female in the business are taking to many things for granted. They felt too secure in their men that they fail to secure their men.
Careless statements women make in marriage
1. I am too tired.
2. You are inconsiderate.
3. I have been so busy.
4. I have a lot to do.
5. Leave me alone.
6. What do you need?
Instead of telling your man that you are tired why not say could you bear with me for now? This choice of word is not only polite but it is a request and where he can't, he would explain his reasons and your opinion could be heard. I am tired is a final word with no alternative option for the other fellow. It is not meant for someone you truly love and who really loved you in return but for a casual affair. Mind you, it means you are fed up with him. At the beginning of any relationship or true love none of the party involved ever got exhausted that much, that there is no time for each other. Love; is the older the merrier but when it turns out to be the older the less fun something is wrong and with time would go horribly wrong.
Truly one could be inconsiderate but who could that be? It is anyone who prefers you dead. could a true lover want her partner dead unbelievable, this word is a verdict of a judge not a wife or a lover. You should just say kindly allow me a little more time. A true husband would ask how long would that be? remember men are naturally impatient in their times of need so never expect a kind response. Men are very good in tendering but in times of need they are aggressive.
I have been so busy, doing what House-hold chores or attending to your boss in the office, good to you but bad for your marriage. No man marries a woman to do just domestic work or contribute to the family purse. If there is any may be one in a million. marriages are meant for intimacy, fun and togetherness. Anything other than this is tertiary not even secondary reason for marriage. Reduce the volume of your work or delegate some so as to attend to your husband.
Men could be of great help if you know how to deal with them. Satisfy you man there after ask him to assist you and see what happens. I don't mean that it should be a routine that any time you need his assistance then you have to be all over him. Such trick would not only fail you but disappoint you. What I mean is that you make him number one in all.
Leave me alone means go for someone else I am not available. Therefore, when he goes out for someone else is he unfaithful? No you first rejected him.
What do you need? As a wife this statement is ambiguous. It shows that you don't or haven't studied your husband's body language. This naturally kills a man from within because he sees himself as to be dealing with a total stranger as a wife. This is one thing most men do not openly complain about but resent it. When a man is craving for the intimacy of his beloved wife and got slammed with this most unkind comment such men initially appears cool within seconds then come up with courage to deal with demoralization but within the hurt lives longer. Within that period and thereafter the man would remember all his exs mostly those who still needs him. So as a wife never fame ignorance of your husband's need.
Every man wants to be faithful but dislikes being taken for granted. Most women have failed in their marriages because they knowing that their men are faithful, they went to sleep on everything that should keep their men glued to them. They become careless in their: dressing, cooking and most of all their sexual life. One thing a man can't do for himself is sex.
Three things that lubricates marriage are:
1. Sex is the primary lubricant in every marriage. To every man, SEX to every man stands for:
When it comes to sex men are always sentimental and perhaps selfish. No man is too kind to know why his urge for sex is to be denied. A man could do anything to have his urge satisfied so trying to force him to subdue it, is the greatest harm any woman could be doing to her marriage.
Extremism in a man could be more noticeable during sexual advances. Men do not like excuses here, they always want to have their ways.
The x-factor: men love great sex. If a woman can take charge and deliver beyond expectation, the man would always cherish such a woman. Men hate passive sex. Many women could give you sex for three sixty five days but in all it is nothing but mere glorified masturbation.
THE BILL OF CONTRACT
Many marriages contracted only on love are now crashing on the foot of sex. I once had a lady colleague who confided in me that she would not be marrying a guy who has been supporting her financially because she does have sexual love for him. She love the guy but do not have any sexual feeling for him. It was that bad that whenever the guy brings up issues relationship sex the lady becomes irritated. This lady is not being wicked but sincere. She tried severally at least to compensate the guy but the feelings wouldn't just come they later broke-up. Love and sex should be considered greatly before marriage. I prefer marrying someone for sex than just for love alone. Sex can build love but love cannot built sex.
Many people would love you for whom you are but not all would want to have sex with you. Love alone in a marriage is injurious and one would get tired and fed-up.
Signs of love alone in a marriage
1. In such a marriage, the wife rarely asks for sex and if the man does, she gives you countless reasons why you shouldn't.
2. She sees herself too strong for not having any urge and when the man does he is branded as a weak fellow who couldn't hold himself.
3. Sex means nothing and shouldn't be an issue. She would tease you that why do such, an inconsequential thing as sex border you that much.
I read in one of the newspapers; how a woman chopped off the husband's genital organ for conspicuously denying her of sex. This shows that no one is weaker but the level of willingness to be involved and consequent dedication and commitment.
Most wives today are fast turning ejaculation tube not sexual partners. Though some men still manage it but this is not good. In most cases where the woman lays like a log motionless but only at intervals asking if you have not ejaculated this act is not only saddening but also killing.
There is no sacred aspect of sex for couples so, we should adopt a free and liberal approach towards sex. A woman wrote her story on a particular dailies that dedicates a day to treat relationships. In her story line she narrated how her husband's job took him out of their locality unfortunately he ran into a commercial sex hawker who gave him a treat. The husband on getting home told the wife that based on his experience that their sex life must be improved but the wife stubbornly refused the husband's entreaties. The husband did not only throw her alone out but along with the children. The only antidote to securing your husband is great sex.
As a wife use the internet and any other medium to learn and develop your sexual delivery. No man pities the woman who fails sexually. Any man you can't go sexually crazy for don't ever think of marrying him. The only burden we bear in a marriage is love but the only thing that lightens it up is great sex.
The secondary lubricant is your physical appearance because this could get you a suitor but it can't keep the man. Being physically attractive is good as well as good character.
The tertiary lubricant has to do with children. I have witnessed great couples without kids even older ones. This is where I hinge my argument that the most important thing in a real marriage is not children but intimacy.
There are more divorces today among couples with kids than it is among couples without kids. most couples asking for divorce lay claim to one of the following unfaithfulness, battery, non-compactibility, lack of care etc. Fewer proportion says childlessness. Unfaithfulness, battery etc is primarily attributed to poor sexual delivery.
Sex is not a duty nor an obligation but a responsibility. Duty is task you could decline if you chose not to while obligation is compulsory therefore you are better a slave because many would be affected should you fail. But sex is a responsibility because you alone must be responsible for the out-come of your actions either is a love or a hate, divorce or the otherwise.