- Gender and Relationships
Who Are Your Close Friends?
What is a friend?
Has it came to your mind who your friends are? I mean a real friend whom you can rely on? A friend who keeps contact to you whatever happens? For good and for bad times? It does not matter which part of the world where she or he lives as long as you still have contact to each other. The world is getting smaller everyday through internet. I am sure that it is not a problem nowadays.
I have been thinking for so long if I should write about friendship. Due to the encouragement of one of my close friends who is living almost four hundred kilometers from my place, I decided to write about it. With the hope that one of our "lost" friends can read it. It seems that she is getting very far away from us.
Well, I´m getting far now. I have to define first what a friend means to me. For me, a friend is somebody whom I can talk to and to whom I can communicate freely. The one who can accept me whatever and whoever I am with all my positive and negative nature. One who cares and respects me, be there for me (even only at the phone or at facebook) not only at happy moments but also at bad times. A friend who does not wait for me to call her, from time to time has the initiative to call me with her own free will, just to have a "nonsense" chat with me. One who not only listens to what I say about myself and my family but also tells me what is going on in her life. Because friendship is all about giving, taking and sharing each others life. A friend who does not wait to have reasons to call me.
Map of Germany
A Book of Friendship
Different types of friends
1. A friend who is like a mother and a sister to me.
This friend of mine is a very long time friend whom I know for thirty years. We met in this foreign country, Germany when we were young, naive and fresh from the Philippines. We shared a lot of experiences from the beginning of our married lives and shared each others ideas and upbringing of our children in a country which culture and traditions are very far from our own. We respect each others opinions, give each other advices, cry and laugh about everything that we encounter in life. And yes, we also quarrel. But we talk about it. We share no grudges. This friend of mine loves to talk about the past. She talks about how she spent her childhood, college and working life in the Philippines. She loves to talk how our children were when they were still kids. She is the oldest friend I have in Germany. Although we are living far (ca.400 km.) from each other for maybe 20 years, we still have contact through phone calls and visit each other from time to time.
2. A friend who lives thousands of kilometers far away.
This is a friend I know now for around 25 years. Although she is not often in this country because she travels a lot, we still contact each other as often as we can. We share the same interests, tastes and we have the same likes and dislikes. She even bought my beautiful Philippine dress( which she tried on in the shop) for me, for the wedding of my son. When we meet, we have a good time talking and laughing about some anecdotes she collected from her travels. She and her family is like family to me. The last time we saw each other, tears came into our eyes. She lives thousands kilometers far away from me but she was always there for me when I needed her.
3. A very religious and positive friend
This is a friend of mine whom I consider to be an old friend for also 25 years. She lived in a town nearby but now lives in the south of Germany. She loved to dance belly dance. Like my friends above, we were sharing our happiness and problems in life. Exchanging our advices and respecting each others life styles. She had at least three skilled occupations since I knew her. Her life seems parallel to mine for like me, she keeps on moving somewhere to live and there are always changes in her life. She is very religious now and she practises meditation and positive thinking was always her way in life. She loves preaching as well. I have not seen her for I think five years but I´ll visit her next month. We have a lot of things to catch up.
4. A sister kind of friend
She became my friend when she came to Germany but I met her as a child of 11 years because she is the sister of my college board mate. She was the one who asked me in her innocent child voice, if I was not afraid to get married to a German who is so big. Fate was crossing our way again when she herself married a German. Since then we contacted each other, I gave her advices and I was there for her when she needed my assistance in life. She is not only a friend but also a younger sister to me. She lives also in the south about 11 hours car drive from our place. The distance that we have did not give problems to our communication. In fact, every time we see each other, she stays with us for a few weeks or I´m with her for a week .We enjoyed going to a spa treatment. I found it every emotional when she told me that she feels at home with me and my husband.
5. A friend who is so far but so very near.
This friend of mine is also a dear friend for almost 30 years. She is very funny that even when we talk through the phone , she makes me laugh until the tears came out of my eyes. She follows me everywhere I go, by calling me here and there more often as the others. She always wanted to visit me but find no time at all although I found out that she had times visiting other friends in other countries. That is why I said to her `I will see you when you are in front of me´. Like the rest of my close friends, she is one of a kind. In every way.
Note: I have only mentioned in this hub the oldest and closest friends that I have. Thank you my friends for being with me.
Find Out Who Your Real Friends Are
Find out who your real friends are. It is not easy for you need time in finding that out. You´ll know who your real friends are when you are in bad times. The one whom you can always count on in good and especially in bad times. But remember, friendship is not a one sided relationship. You have to work for it, to be worth it, for the growth of it. Friendship is like a plant which needs watering and sunlight to grow.
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