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Wedding Planning Stress: Top Causes of Wedding Stress and Ways to Destress

Updated on July 25, 2014

Wedding Planning is Stressful

Wedding planning can be incredibly stressful and frustrating for couples. When you feel that way, it can be extra difficult because you feel like you're supposed to be filled with joy over planning your wedding. If you find yourself frustrated about wedding planning, try these tips to relieve the stress.


Why Couples Feel Stress When Wedding Planning

There are so many causes for wedding planning stress. Common reasons that couples report feeling stressed when wedding planning include:

Finances - It's very expensive to get married. Even for couples with an unlimited budget, every decision that you make when planning a wedding comes down to finances. How much do you want to spend on a DJ? How much will it cost to invite everyone on your guest list?

Different backgrounds - Planning wedding ceremonies brings up religion, culture, and family backgrounds, all of which can be very stressful for couples who have different backgrounds. If you have your heart set on a traditional religious wedding and your fiance grew up an atheist, you two may have some difficult and stressful conversations ahead.

Family expectation - Everyone will weigh in on your wedding, and this can be very frustrating. You want your special day to be reflective of you two, but you have to constantly hear everyone else tell you how they feel about your wedding colors, your menu, or your choice of venue. Your family may also want to add lots of extended relatives and family friends to your guest list. If it's their dime, that may be fine, but if it's not, negotiating with them can be difficult.

So much to do - There is a ton to plan when planning your wedding. Many couples relieve the stress of wedding planning by delegating items to friends and family members. Even when you do this, there's still a lot to do.

Taste levels - You and your fiancee have your own taste. Your parents, cousins, bridesmaids, and friends may have different tastes. Hearing everyone weigh in on your wedding colors, venue choice, or dress can be really challenging.

Time consuming - Wedding planning is incredibly time consuming for couples. Even if you start planning a year in advance, you'll be planning right up until the week of the wedding. It's a marathon, not a sprint. After you've spent so much time planning the wedding, you can begin to feel burned out and still have so much to plan. This also causes tension between couples when one person does a lot of work and the other has to be dragged kicking and screaming into working on the wedding.

Your wedding expectations are different from reality - Many people dream about their weddings from childhood on. Others do not do this, and have no idea what they want to happen on their big day. No matter which camp you fall into, you can find that the reality of your wedding (venue, budget, dress, cake) doesn't match up with the vision you've developed in your head. Some brides becomes very stressed over this.

From the dress to the venue, it can all be so stressful.
From the dress to the venue, it can all be so stressful. | Source

Tips for Getting Through the Wedding Planning Phase

If you feel stressed when planning your wedding, knowing that you are not alone can help you feel better. Most couples feel stressed out at times when planning their wedding.

When the stress mounts, consider taking a step back from wedding planning. Maybe have a date night in, watch a movie, and order take out. Or get out of the house and do something fun that won't bring up the wedding. Yes, you may feel like you don't have time to do this. However, taking a night off can refresh your energy and make it easier to plan.

Some people find it helpful to develop a mantra they can repeat when stress arises. Sometimes, taking a deep breath and remembering how much you love one another can make the little worries seem less important.


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