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Wedding Thank You Note Etiquette

Updated on March 9, 2014

When To Say Thanks

When you’re a bride, there are so many things you have to remember to do.

Some of them are more important than others. One very important thing you mustn’t forget is to send Thank You notes for all the gifts you receive.

To be in good taste, it is always required that you send a Thank You note. It’s not okay just to thank someone in person. While that is, of course, always a good idea too, you can’t end it there.

If they took the time to buy a present for you and your husband, you’re going to need to thank them in writing.

Ordering Thank You Cards

Consider ordering your Thank You notes at the same time you order your wedding stationery.

They will be printed in the same design and look polished and perfect.

That way your whole wedding theme will have flowed all the way through flawlessly.

Plus, you won’t have to remember to order them when you get back from your honeymoon.

You’ll have them ready to go right away and will be able to get them done before you even have time to procrastinate.


When to Send

As wedding gifts come in from relatives far away, send a Thank You note right away. You don’t have to wait until the wedding is over to thank them. They want to know that you got it, so get your note in the mail without delay.

Otherwise, your wedding Thank You notes should go out within two weeks after you return from your honeymoon. Even if you’re exhausted and sunburnt, you still have to get to it. So block out some time to complete this important task. Have your new husband help you as well. You should already have all the addresses from your wedding invitation list, so have him write out the envelopes while you write out the cards. Be sure to include your new return address. You may want to have a stamp made with it before you leave for your honeymoon so you don’t have to handwrite it each time.

When you give a wedding gift, when do you expect a thank you card?

See results

Use Blue or Black Ink

Use only blue or black ink to write out your notes. While you may love your pink gel pen dearly, Aunt Frances may not be able to see it very well on a note card. Defer to a more modest ink when writing your notes.

Always handwrite them. Never send a note that has been printed off a computer or from a printer. While of course your card will be printed, the sentiment inside should be fully yours and personalized to each gift giver.


Shower Gifts & Thank You's

If you received a shower gift, you should send out your thank you within ten days of the shower. Any later than that and it looks like you didn’t care enough to make it a priority to thank the giver. And be sure to write a thank you to each person who hosted your shower.

If you receive a shower gift close to the wedding date and then a wedding gift from the same person at the wedding, you must send two Thank You cards. Even if you’re super busy, you can’t just lump both thank yous together in one card. In the giver’s mind they are two separate occasions and two separate gifts.

Example 1

Take the time to write out specifically what the gift was and how you will use it. Here’s a sample you can use:

Example 2

Be sincere in your thank yous and if you don’t remember what they gave you or if cards got misplaced, as they often do, just simply say thank you for the giver’s thoughtfulness without mentioning the actual gift. Try this:

Even the shortest thank you note is better than none at all. Just be careful to spell correctly and write neatly no matter how rushed you are.


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    • randomcreative profile image

      Rose Clearfield 6 years ago from Milwaukee, Wisconsin

      I get a little upset when I don't receive thank you notes for wedding gifts that I give, especially when they are for good friends. It does not take long to write thank you notes and the little messages go a long way.

    • jkvkdailey4 profile image

      jkvkdailey4 6 years ago from Minnesota

      My husband and I didn't receive thank you cards from the last 2 weddings we attended, so it felt as if our gift was unappreciated. Thanks for sharing proper etiquette with those who may not know otherwise!

    • janices7 profile image

      Janice S 6 years ago

      What a useful hub for newly married couples!


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