- Gender and Relationships
What Is Your Mojo Like? Ahem, I'm Single. No Comment
Does mojo expire? Cause I swear I'm in hottie overload.
Warning: there is adult content in this Hub. Back away now if you're under age or overly oppressed.
Irony: The state I'm in now, I'd say I'm probably the latter..... or just in need of something.
Here's the issue: I've been abstinent for almost a year now, and although it isn't by choice, I'm feeling like a starved survivor on an island. And there are coconuts all over the palm trees and fish in the ocean (although I don't like fish) and I can't get a single taste in my mouth. For sustenance. I'm really, REALLY hungry, okay?
Which brings me to this question: does libido ever go away?
I wonder because I had a really salacious dream about one of my co-workers. No, we haven't been intimate (yet), but the sexual chemistry is thick enough to cut with a knife. Basically, I woke up in a cold sweat at the sound of my alarm at 6:10 in the morning, so I'll never know what would have happened. Just like it's still pending in real life. Nonetheless, I felt cheated from a good experience— even if it's only in my subconscious mind.
Does "it" ever go away? Should I be afraid of losing my mojo?
So as I woke with a big grin on my face, I had the sad fact of reality to tend to: I've been without a real "partner" for almost a year. To be clear, I could get action at any moment, simply by going to a local bar. Shoot, I've even walked those steps a few times. The problem is that the fix is short lived. I want the entire package.... You know, emotional and physical connection. I may starve in the process, but since I'm still a size four, it's obvious that food isn't my sin of choice.... It's lust.
I joke with my other single co-worker about our situation. She has a FB. I don't. :(
I recently read a fascinating book that answered all my questions about why it's so difficult to make a real relationship today. According to Jillian Straus' , my generation (Gen X), is too worried about finding their soul mate that they pass up perfectly good relationships because of the "grass is greener" effect. Everyone is seeking some level of a perfect match while claiming they don't want to settle. Unhooked Generation
Let me tell you something: You will never find perfection. You're not perfect. If you can find someone who's decent, cares about you and makes you happy, you should be tickled.
But the fact remains: I got hot in my dream and there's no one in my life to cuddle with. This is the worst, WORST part about singledom. Don't get me wrong.... I love my new happy single life where no one can push my buttons. But I am a touch double-you-aych-oh-are-eeee. I like to give and receive all the physical gratification possible. For reference, look up the libido of Hungarian women. I want to feel closeness, body heat, a man's hands on my hips (and elsewhere) and a cuddle buddy to sneak up to when I watch a scary movie on Netflix.
Hey, if I have to live vicariously through my dreams, so be it.
I'm not desperate to find someone, hence why you won't find me shmoozing in a local bar for mates. But I do miss the human connection, physically and mentally. My mojo is on high alert. I wish it would just go away, but for now, she seems to have a happy place in my libido.
What are your experiences? How long could you go without sex? Does your libido go away after long pauses? Please share your experience (it would make me feel so much better, along with many others, I'm sure).