What Men Really Want...
An Independent or a Self-sufficient Woman?
The bold statement of being an Independent Woman has died down a bit but the atmosphere of the movement hasn’t. “I can buy my own drink. I can pay my own bills. And I can take care of that other need (truth be told, better than you can) if need be.”
Interestingly enough, there were and are many men turned off by the ideology of the new millennium woman. Yes, real men still want to be needed and desired, and are not looking for a pass on taking care of their women. That is one blurred line they are not interested in.
What Men Want Is a Self-sufficient Woman.
That woman who who is not broke, busted and disgusted by her lack of funds. You know, that woman whose theme song is Ain’t Nothing Going On But the Rent. No one, including women, want to be used but we all want to be valued and cherished. And the independent woman finds very little, if any, value in a man.
So, what’s the difference between the independent woman and the self-sufficient woman, you ask?
Not the "Independent" Woman...
To go along with the, “I can pay my own bills so I don’t need a man for anything” mantra that the independent woman is chanting, is usually a stank attitude to boot. She wants to make all of her own decisions and the idea of teaming up with a man and getting his input is offsetting to her. She thinks that all men are only interested in bringing her down so she stays on the defensive. She’s hard and presents herself as a man’s equal, giving herself masculine qualities.
The self-sufficient woman can, however, take care of herself financially but would welcome a man to come along and join forces with her to build a life. She works and is a good financial planner. She takes care of her appearance and appreciates when a man notices. The self-sufficient woman never equates herself to men and she isn’t confused about her femininity. Yes, she can take herself to dinner. Yes, her bills are paid and she may even own her own home. However, she would have no problem relinquishing control to her man. And she sees herself as an asset and not a liability in a relationship.
Do Men Know the Difference Between the Two?
You bet they do! Any self-sufficient man is wise enough to know which of the two women he can build a life with and which of those women will have something to offer as well as appreciate what he has to offer. So ladies, before you think that a man is celebrating your independence when high-fiving you and cheering you on when you say you can do it your damn self, what he’s really doing is taking that cue to move on to the woman who values his presence.