- Gender and Relationships»
- Dating & Online Dating
What No one Tells You About Heartbreak
You meet a guy and you think that he is perfect for you. The only problem is that you and him both want different things. You want the relationship and for him to commit to you while he is younger than you and he is trying to get you to sleep with him without any strings attached. He never calls you as much as you want him to call you. He won't spend time with you in public or take you out. It is only when it is convenient for him. He pushes you away and then months later he pulls you back in. Then he does it two more times until one day he leaves and after awhile you have a feeling he is leaving for good.
Your friends may tell you to move on and say hurtful things. They may encourage you to go out and date someone new. When you go out to bars or online the only guys you meet are here today and gone tomorrow. No one knows the pain you are feeling inside. When these guys leave you keep remembering him and how even though you and him had fights in the past he eventually always came back. You wish that one day he would just come back and tell you that you are the girl he wants and that he is sorry for the pain he caused you.
The truth is you will move on but it will not happen as quickly as everyone thinks. When you have loved someone for a long time or had high expectations of being with that person your feelings just do not go from 100 to 0 in a second. They take time to go away. You can't force yourself to stop thinking about someone that will only make you think about that person more.
Know this when you are going through heartbreak it is not going to last. The nights when you get no sleep and when you are crying all the time will not be forever. The pain you are feeling inside. The feeling like your heart was ripped outside of your chest and there is a dark cloud following above you wherever you go. You won't have to feel that you are not good enough anymore when you go on Facebook or Instagram and you see the guy you love liking a bunch of selfies of girls in bikinis. The time will come where you will even stop looking at his profile and won't even care who talks to him.
How do you do it? Know that everything will be okay. It may take awhile but one day you will be back to your old self again. Another thing to know is that one day the right person will walk into your life and that is when you are going to forget that this guy ever existed. Now and then you may remember the horrible experience you faced because it was a traumatic experience for you but you will thank God that it didn't work out with him because you found someone so much better. You will see now why it didn't work out with him.
Do you just move on or take time to heal after a break up?
With someone coming into your life and making you feel better you can't put a time limit on it. It is just going to happen. So don't go around saying "Why am I not meeting anyone?" Just relax, do your thing and let the universe bring the perfect guy to you. If you keep going to bars and online dating to get over this guy you are never going to get over him because guys there are going to be here today and gone tomorrow. Unless that is what you are looking for. Try going for a different guy if you want a guy who is going to stick around.
Making new friends helps and having hobbies also. Listing to music like Kathrine McPhee "Over It," could put you in such a good mood and help you be ready to finally put this guy in the past.
The truth is people who move on right away might have never really loved that person. You don't have strong feelings for someone for a long time and then one day just say "next." No you cry it out, get angry, dust yourself off and then put yourself back there.
In life you fall down and it is okay to fall down. You must remember that even though you fall down it is not okay to stay down. When you get back up and overcome what has been meant to destroy you that is how you know you are a warrior. You will smile again. You will laugh again. You will dance again and one day that person will walk into your life and relight that passion that someone stole from you. All the things that you were telling to the other guy you will now be telling to someone new. You will get back into your old hobbies and find out things about yourself that you never knew before. Life can be beautiful again you just have to trust that things will get better with time and not rush the process or moving on.
- Why You Should Never Force Yourself To Move On
When something comes to an end, you need to give yourself all the time you need to get over it and be well with yourself when you move on.