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What Statistics Tell Us About Long Distance Relationships
How Common Are Long Distance Relationships?
Is it really a long distance relationship when you can send an exquisite bouquet of red roses to your girlfriend in almost real time at the touch of a button? Plus, you have a heart to heart, face to face, thanks to all the video calling apps. I guess one must call it long distance when you have to hug yourself to make yourself feel better because your partner is in another city, another country and maybe in a few years, on Mars! According to a study, conducted by the Center for the Study of Long Distance Relationships, way back in 2005, and quoted much more recently in an article in Today.com, 2.9% of marriages in the United Stated were considered to be long distance, with one in 10 reporting time spent apart within the first three years of marriage. What this essentially suggests is that there were more than three and a half million people in the US alone in 2005 who were in a long distance relationship. The study also revealed that 4.0-4.5 million college going couples in the country were estimated to have been in a non-marital long distance relationship (LDR).
It is only reasonable to assume that given how small the world is becoming with advances in technology and globalization, LDRs have been on the rise. In fact, according to PerfectRelationship.com, one-third of the married couples living in large cities across the world are estimated to actually be living apart due to various reasons, such as job commitments, military deployment or education.
Long Distance Relationship Statistics at a Glance
Long Distance Relationship Statistics
Total percentage of U.S. marriages that are considered long distance relationships
Average amount of time for long distance relationship to break up if it?s not going to work
Total percentage of long distance relationships that fail when changes aren?t planned for
Total amount of couple who claim they?re in a long distance relationship
Total percentage of marriages in U.S. that start as a long distance relationship
Total percentage of college relationships that are long distance
Total percent of long distance relationships that break-up
Total percentage of engaged couples that have been in a long distance relationship
Total amount of marriages that are long distance relationships
Do LDRs Really Work?
According to statistics revealed by Science of Relationships, 40% of all LDRs fail, including those where the partners are married, and 70% of these failures are due to unplanned situations that one of the partners finds themselves in. The good news is that not all relationships fail and if it is doomed to collapse, it usually does no within the first five months of the partners living away from each other.
Figures released in 2015 by Long Distance Relationship Statistics, say that the average distance in LDRs is 125 miles, while the average number of times partners visit each other per month is 1.5 times, with an average of three letters written each months and an average of 2.7 days between phone calls. On an average, the couple does not expect to move back together before the next 14 months. What the statistics basically tell us is that LDRs don’t fail any more than proximal relationships do and this is definitely contrary to popular belief.
What Makes LDRs Successful?
According to a 2014 article in Huffington Post, there are four characteristics that seem to define most successful LDRs. Firstly, when each partner prioritizes the other above almost all other social commitments, local or otherwise, there is less resentment about the effort needed to keep the relationship going. Secondly, when partners commit to spending more time together, rather than just meeting on the weekends, the bond is more likely to strengthen, given that there will be greater opportunity to get to know each other.
The unfortunate reality of LDRs is that there isn’t that much time to spend together. However, if there can be a way to share each other’s social and/or family worlds, they become part of the same community, which goes a long way to sustain the bond. Lastly, planning is key to keeping the spark alive. Given that the couple might live miles apart from each other, it will take some serious planning to ensure that they meet regularly. Leaving things to chance might lead to long periods of being away, which in turn will eat into the bond.
Sustaining the Relationship
What statistics tell us is that LDRs tend to fail as often as proximal relationships do. The important thing is to understand the challenges of such relationships and the fact that these obstacles will be different from those faced by those in proximal relationships. According to ReachOut.com, there are benefits of LDRs that the couple should keep in mind while coping with the challenges, such as the space and independence it affords each partner, the opportunity to try different methods of communication or even the fact that it helps you value your bond more that you otherwise would.
Also, according for the Center for the Study of Long Distance Relationships, there are some things that you can do to make it work. For instance, it is important to stay optimistic, reminded yourself and each other of the positives, while debunking the common myths. Communication is key. Couples who are able to share their everyday experiences or plan together for the next day feel more connected. Also, keeping track of each other’s important events and dates helps. Most, importantly though, learning how to be intimate despite the distance needs special attention. Most people in long distance relationships say that the biggest hurdle is sexual intimacy. In fact, experts at GetFifi.com say that if the partners are able to find a way to have sexual release with each other on a regular basis, the relationship is more likely to be sustained for a longer period of time. And with technological advancements that allow people to video call and even “self-pleasure,” the means to stay intimate have definitely increased.