- Gender and Relationships»
- Relationship Problems & Advice
When Love Fails You
Being in a loving relationship with the person that you see a future with is a rare and unique gift.
Your partner is your best friend, confidant, lover and soulmate. He or she is the person you can talk to about anything, sharing every little moment in life together without any secrets or lies.
You imagine that life could not go on without them and as you picture having a family and growing old together your face lights up at the thought.
Unfortunately instead of growing old together some people grow apart and it is often not because they do not love each other anymore but because life gets in the way.
The Happy Days
When you first meet the man or woman of your dreams you do everything you can to impress them. Frequent dates and quality time spent together is what you crave the minute you wake up in the morning and the two of you can't get enough of each other.
After dating for a while you feel comfortable with your partner and long hours of work encourages you to sit in front of the television and just relax, unwind and forget about the day.
Once you have moved in with your partner you run out of things to talk about but still enjoy each others company. Most women that have moved in with their partners have found that the men begin to take her for granted and continue to do the things they did whilst single. Watch sport, drop their things everywhere and expect dinner to be ready and served.
The mistake women make is doing all of these things in the beginning in order to please their men, which is later expected of them.
Dates become fewer and conversation starts drifting but the love is still there.
Once you have children or you have lived together for a number of years, little things start to irritate you and interference or interuptions from kids can cause a distancing effect on a couple.
The men come home and just want to relax whilst the women have been expected to take care of the children, cook dinner and clean house. There might be a reward in there where your spouse will either grin and bear it through a romantic movie, take you out for dinner or treat you to some affection once in a blue moon!
Women love to be loved and you should be adored by your partner. Communicating how you feel should be easy but the longer you are together and the more stress you both have, communication becomes hard and almost non existant.
If you begin to feel lonely than you need to communicate that with your partner and if that doesn't help than you need to tell them again. Create a moment where you can be sexy and inspire your partner to want to pay attention.
Work is strenuous and most men want to just put their feet up after a days work while others want to have a drink with their mates. There are one or two that want to come home and talk about their day but that is very rare!
You have to make time for your partner even if you have children, stress, work etc and if they love you it will be easy for you to let them know how you are feeling.
After years of being with someone it is very difficult to want to spend every minute of the day with them and we all need our space but when the space becomes too much, people tend to drift apart.
Your partner will still want to spend time with you and if you have given each other space then the natural rythm of things is to miss your partner and ensure that you get to be with them at some stage.
If your partner is no longer interested in listening to you and has switched off completely, it is important to let them know that you are not happy and there could be a problem that they are not communicating with you.
Once you have established what that is than you need to respark your romance and if that is still not working than try again.
Signs That Love Has Failed.
You have communicated with him or her and they have shown know interest in trying.
They are distant and uninterested all the time.
Show interest in other things and couldn't be bothered to listen to you or help you.
Will go out in a group but not alone with you.
He or she has photo's of past girlfriends/boyfriends that they frequently look at.
They shout at you abusively.
They do not compromise.
Don't care if you have told them you are leaving.
Focus on everything or anything except you.
They don't care if you are being chatted up or flirted with.
Change Your Life.
It is very sad to fall out of love with someone especially when you just can't fall back in love. Love dies and you have no more energy to try or energy to argue and you feel like you are alone.
Life is a precious gift and we must enjoy each and every moment of it. Yes there are many times in a long relationship where a partner needs space and time to do their own thing but it must never feel like you are the only one trying.
Take a good look at your life and relationship to see if this is worth while but remember that if you have spoken to your partner about it and they are not trying or making any effort than you need to understand that they probably wont be changing and this is what you will be doing for the rest of your life.
Only you can change your life and there is only so much that you can do or say to make your partner feel for you and if they haven't after all your efforts than it is time to take not that Love is not there anymore and you are in this for the sake of children or convenience, being taken for granted when there is someone out there who will Love and Adore you and want to make an effort to keep you happy.
Life After Love
As Cher sings it, life after love can be possible and it doesn't matter how hard you try if someone is pushing you aside. There are many ways to try to work on a relationship but if it is one sided then there is nothing left to do but move on and continue forward into a fresh start with a new beginning. Love is out there and the right person or your soulmate is waiting to love you completely.