Why Men Need More Than One Woman
For centuries this has been a subject of debat among men and women. Despite religious teachings and cultural transformation, a comprehensive answer to the question of men's desire for more than one sexual partner, is still elusive.
Some people argue that men are simply selfish, brats, with an enormous appetite for sexual relations, which cannot be satisfied by one woman. Some men support this school of thought, adding that men who make out with more than one woman, are in fact natural adulterers, who can’t control their lust, and need for pleasure. Whether this is true or not, is food for thought for you and me.
This article aims at being objective, as we shade some light on a few meaningful facts that should be considered before throwing men to the Gallows.
It's important to note that no religious, cultural or gender disrespect is intended. You are free to disagree with my reasoning, and please feel free to share your thoughts on this sensitive topic.
Despite having different paths in the history of evolution, all organisms in the animal kingdom share certain traits. This could be because all life started from the same source - the primitive single celled organisms. It is therefore a miss-conception, to view human beings from a totally unique perspective, that separates us from all the other organisms traversing the planet. This also applies to the issue of sexual relations and reproductive science.
In many other organisms, once the female is mated, she no longer wants the male around. Her interest is now the well-being of her future children. Some actively chase the male away and in extreme cases they eat or kill them after mating. Situations in which the male’s life is spared, he wonders off looking for the next available suitor. Among our closest cousins-the primates-there is an Alpha male who will breed with any female within the family group in order to instinctively propagate his traits into the next generation. He often fights off other males to protect his territory.
In humans, the story is similar. Ounce a woman is pregnant; her chief concern dramatically switches from her mate to the well-being of the baby growing in her womb, and the life there after. This goes on until way into the babies first few years of life (and men need to understand this). The usual requirement for the male is to provide food and to protect the family unit. Now the difference is, humans are emotional beings. So if this goes on long enough the male starts to feel the need to find emotional attention elsewhere, by instincts.(And for men this comes with sex). This however, doesn’t mean that the man no longer cares for his family unit.
The point is this. Without disruption from modern social and religious teachings, men would be like the primates who work hard (by instinct) to propagate their gene to the next generation. Men are genetically programed that way. Therefore trying to make men monogamous is fighting natural genetic programing.
You will also note, that women play along to the basic masculine instincts. They work hard to look beautiful and seductive through make up, mini skirts, tight fitting pants and swaying bottoms, all to highlight and give the impression of availability.
Simply put, men are naturally ready to breed with any available mate. And like our animal relatives, women express their availability through accentuating their features to try and get the best available male eye.
Men are Naturally Insecure
Sounds pathetic, right? But believe it or not, men are afraid that they aren’t that cutting in life. Not just at work, but also at home as husbands, and in their private lives. They may not necessarily vocalize this, but are secretly vulnerable.
To a Real man, affirmation from a female is everything, and they just can’t seem to get enough of it. This is why they are constantly going after the most expensive watch, tie, car and so forth in order to impress. It’s this affirmation that grows their confidence and turns them into the most attractive guy every girl covets. I know a guy who openly confessed that it was a life changing experience when one of his secret girlfriends told him that his new pair of boxers looked amazing on him. It helped him feel more comfortable in his body. And don’t be fooled to imagine that it has anything to do with flattery. It must be genuine affirmation, because flattery will soon be busted. The more they get, the more they need.
But sex means more than just sex. Of course its true men want more sex naturally. It’s also easy to assume that men want sex simply to satisfy their lustful desires. Many men will tell you that casual sex is in fact not that fulfilling, if there are no genuine heart feelings. Surprisingly, men have this burning desire to be desired. They simply need to be wanted. A man needs to feel desired before they can find sex fulfilling. If this is not availed, they will keep trying elsewhere. Regular fulfilling sex is important to a man’s general wellbeing and it has a profound effect on the rest of his life. As a real man slowly works his way around his woman's neck, down her spine and so forth, his heart beats faster, blood rushes to his big bulging brain, and his mind goes at ease. A sense of selflessness fills his mind, and all he can think of, is how to bring ecstasy to his woman’s life. No moment in life matches this.
Sex is thus good for a man’s heart. It seems to bring out the best in any man (the selfless nature of a real man). The big question is: “can’t he achieve all this with one woman?” Truth is, everyone is entitled to their opinion. But I will tell you, the more he gets, the better he becomes. And like I said, most women are sometimes not as quick with sex as men are. So a brother needs to have options in case one is not in the mood.
It is also a fact that men enjoy romance, but often doubt their skill to be romantic. Being glued to one woman doesn’t help this at all. He needs to explore and learn. Learn that romance is not just about the art of sex, and the bitter fact that every woman defines romance in her own language.
Let me know what you think
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© 2013 Ian Batanda