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Why You Should Leave A Physical Or Mentally Abusive Relationship

Updated on December 3, 2016

This intervention should not occur after it happens one time. It should not occur after it happens two times or after you ask them to stop. This abuse should be ended after this happens the very first time.

This is not an instance in which you two are fighting. You both are hitting each other and that's not good either. No pushing, shoving, slapping, or throwing things. Believe it or not, men and women do just fight. Also, men are not always the victors in this situation either. Stop fighting!

This is an instance where one or the other is not hitting, but getting beaten like a punching bag for disagreeing, for asking questions, for trying to have a discussion, for coming in late, for not cooking, over a disagreement, or something entirely other.

This an instance when you get put into the hospital or nearly killed. And in this article, these are the reasons that one should leave as soon as physical or mental abuse happens.

i. Things Can Get Out Of Control

There is the notion that someone can either be accidentally killed or murdered. No one wants themselves to get seriously hurt to the point of being handicapped either. This violence could spread to other family members such as the children.

The situation could also incite violence from other parts of the family such as brothers cousins, uncles, and sisters. It could be a major mess that can lead to legal issues, death, loss, and a lot of pain. It is best to get away from this person.

ii. Lack of Peace

One cannot have a peaceful day without the nonsense of someone else. One would probably have to tiptoe around them so they can live. It is too much to live in a place where you are afraid or have to fear for your well-being. The worry that can settle into a person because of this is horrible and troubling to live with.

No one should have to be around a person that cannot have a nice normal peaceful day. If you cannot say good morning without an argument, verbal, or physical abuse; then the relationship should end.

iii. This Person Needs To Be Alone

Demons. This person has mental issues, these are what one considers demons. They need time alone and the person getting all the abuse needs to be away from them. There are many couples that work through issues with the significant other if they have a violent temper, but this also includes a professional therapist or marriage counselor.

However, there are almost all problems that exist in a person's head that they have to fix on their own. Personal or mental problems are not often fixed by others. This person may need to be alone so they can get themselves together. Therefore, by all means, leave them alone to fix their problems. They cannot fix their issues abusing you.

iv. This Person Can Turn YOU Into a Psycho

At a Harbor house for battered women, my mother and I was listening to a woman that had, after several years of extreme physical abuse from her husband, snapped. The police pulled up to her home and she was on the front porch beating her already unconscious husband in the head with a two-by-four (2x4) without end.

Her face was the face of an old woman and she was only 23 years old. Her teeth were crooked and bent inwards. She told us how he tried to break her neck through the staircase rods, and how he threw her out of the house naked at times. She talked about rape and being in labor and he would not drive her to the hospital. She talked about walking in the snow trying to get to the hospital and how plastic surgery could not fix the lines in her face. She had long thick amounts of white strands in her hair. She had shown us the picture of herself when she got married and she looked like a young pretty woman not like a woman over 50 years old. That was scary. This should be scary to a lot of people. She didn't even remember where she got the two-by-four from.

Abuse can change you. The suffering it causes can change you. It can change you towards your kids, your family, it can ruin your disposition, your decisions, and beliefs. Don't let yourself be driven unstable and emotionally and mentally ruined.

Last Note

End abuse as soon as it begins, in that after the first time, it can't happen again. This is not an easy thing I'm sure, but it is the wisest and smartest going to do for yourself. People that have established harbor houses and places for people who are abused are a blessing. They are willing to help you get yourself together and start a new life. Give yourself a chance to live comfortably and end abuse as soon as it begins.


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    • ainezk profile image

      ainezk 2 years ago

      The entire thing can be quite confusing, so it may be sometimes too difficult to deal with these sorts of things.

    • SonQuioey10 profile image

      Toni Northern 2 years ago from Williamston NC

      Thanks for reading @dashingscorpio. Great name. I totally agree with you, especially in regards to happiness.

      Thanks again

      SonQ (toni)

    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 2 years ago

      I agree the relationship should end after the (first) incidence!

      However I'd also consider (pushing) to be a violent action as well.

      The main reason why people should leave a toxic relationships is because they love and respect themselves.

      You're responsible for your own happiness.

      Each of us gets to (choose) our own friends, lovers, and spouse.

      "Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary."

      - Oscar Wilde

      If someone is constantly berating you or beating on you they clearly don't believe (you) are all that "special".

      Thankfully we have over 7 Billion other people on the planet and the odds are in your favor there is more than one person who would love and appreciate you for who you are! Have the courage to move on!

      The world may not owe you anything but (you) owe yourself the world!

      One man's opinion! :)