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Why women leave

Updated on January 15, 2016

Why would someone choose being alone over being with you after many years, after love, marriage, and despite your efforts?

First do not underestimate the effect of fights. You may think they are business as usual but your partner may see them as an escalation. She may have forgiven you for the very same thing before, even many times, but it doesn't mean what you did in the past didn't stay with her like dirt thrown into a well until the well is completely filled up.

Second, as people change, and they do every day, relationship dynamics change. Love is a river and rivers can run dry. At some point, a person who didn't know how to tune you out, may learn to do it. She may block you by moving out of the part of herself that you inhabit, like a snake shedding it's skin or a lizard long it's tail.

You may be further along in the relationship then you were before as nothing stands still, but does that mean you love her the way you did before? If you don't, she may notice and it will change everything. Women do not want to be simply kept, they need to be adored. Women leave because they notice that you stopped loving them. Cheating, lying, not providing for them, disrespect and fighting her on what's most important is how she knows. Love can be like a barren field.

Or it can turn toxic like red tide, killing all living things inside it, when she learns who you really are. You will be surprised how long that may have taken her, especially if you are a manipulative, selfish, overbearing prick.

You may not think you are, and then you will be left saying to yourself that she is wrong for not giving you a chance, if you can even accept that it's over. Or you may know this, and then you will just feel lonely. Will you regret it? Not fully, and that's why she left.

You lost the love of your life? Then you probably deserved it. Love does not leave lightly. You have to kick it and mix it with manure a few times. You have to choke it so it won't survive. You had many close calls, but you prioritized wrong. Speak to your love after death and even in death it will treat you with kindness. Love is not an angry ghost.

Relationships may die.It is not gold that keeps them alive because gold can be replaced and not flowers because they wither, but water because you will always need it. Feel your love, let it come from a place that is most alive in you.


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    • limpet profile image

      Ian Stuart Robertson 14 months ago from London England

      Indeed! It is a woman's perogative to change her mind.

    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 20 months ago

      "You lost the love of your life? Then you probably deserved it. "

      Some people might say same thing about if you were cheated on as well. "You deserved it." Truth be told both men and women walk away from relationships and marriages.

      If someone walks away they did you a favor!

      In order for your (ex) to have been "the one" they would have had to see (you) as being "the one". At the very least a "soul-mate" is someone who actually wants to be with you! (And vice versa).

      "Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary."

      - Oscar Wilde

      If someone walks away from you they don't think you're all that special.

      Having said that there is no point in staying in an unhappy/toxic relationship! If either person has to "change" in order to make the relationship work it just means they chose the wrong mate!

      Most of us want to be loved and appreciated for who (we) are.

      The goal is to find someone who shares your same values, wants the same things for the relationship that you do, naturally agrees with you on how to obtain those things, and last but not least there is a mutual depth of love and desire for one another.

      Each of us (chooses) our own friends, lovers, and spouse.

      Choosing the wrong mate for oneself is the #1 cause of divorce.

      Like attracts like and opposites attract divorce attorneys!

      There is no amount of work or communication that can overcome being with someone who does not want what you want.

      There are only two ways to experience joy and peace of mind in relationships: We either get what we want or we learn to be happy with what we have. Accept them as (is) or move on.

      Thankfully we live on a planet with over 7 Billion people!

      Odds are in everyone's favor that there are more than a few people who would make an ideal mate for any of us.

      When it comes to love and relationships most of us (fail our way) to success. If this were not the case we'd all be married to hour high school sweethearts! Every ending is a new beginning!

    • Eric Flynn profile image

      Eric Wayne Flynn 20 months ago from Providence, Rhode Island

      I agree with this stance. If you neglect a plant and do not nurture it, it will whither and it will die.

      EWF

    • limpet profile image

      Ian Stuart Robertson 20 months ago from London England

      Well my reasons for being left by some one are two fold. Firstly before stating them, i must mention the fact that in my home town i was blacklisted by all potential girl friends as unsuitable. This was initiated by a particular school teacher for his ego. As a young adult i lacked confidence in myself to enter into a relationship and any attempt resulted in rejection. I developed a complex where i would actually enjoy being rebuffed. At the age of 40 i was taken in as a lodger by an older divorcee with two grown children. A relationship did develop but only for two years when she gave me notice to leave the house within a week. Not content with getting me out of her house, she wrote saying her new boy friend was much better than me. I won't go into detail about the final relationship other than it was a dangerous lady to say the least.