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Why I Broke Up With My Dry Cleaner

Updated on May 8, 2011

Forty-Something Gay - Episode 3

Forty-Something Gay Vblog

When Rosie O’Donnell started doing video blogs my mother decided I needed to do video blogs. While my mother does not control all of my actions (at forty-something) when she’s right, she’s right. And so I began to wonder what I could say on a video that needed to been seen and not just read as my blogs were on my website. What perspective could I give that perhaps others share and some don’t even understand? Well, all I had going for me was that I had lived forty-something years and I was a gay man. Hmmmm, that’s it! And thus the Forty-Something Gay video blog was born! I hope you enjoy this one and all the installments which are available on YouTube!

Episode 3 - Why I Broke Up With My Dry Cleaner! In this episode hear the whole ugly story of being treated unfairly for being gay and how good it feels to stand up for yourself.


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      Heather 9 years ago

      Scott,You know I love you, so I have to tell you...snotty teenagers in minimum-wage jobs do that to everybody.  So cheers for standing up against injustice.  But I'm afraid the injustice didn't befall you because you're short, Jewish, or gay (of which I am also 2/3).  It is simply because you're not that girl's BFF.And P.S., when you do go back to Donna, be sure to check your pockets carefully.  Just imagine what she's telling the bounty hunter about you!Love you,H

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      somelikeitscott 10 years ago from Las Vegas

      Alex, Thank you and I think you're absolutely right about all of your observations. I am also a softy and as I look at the pile of dry cleaning piling up and having no place to go (because I hate change and resent that I have to go finding a new dry cleaner)...each day I think about "needing dry cleaning is human, to forgive divine!" Scott

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      Alex 10 years ago

      Scott, congratulations on learning to stand up for yourself! It feels great, doesn't it?

      I think the employer definitely has some potential grounds for termination (depends on exactly how the employment laws read in NY how *easy* it is, or how ugly it could get if the girl wants to contest the termination . . . ) but I'm of two minds about going back. On the one hand, I'm a big softy and I HATE making people feel bad. I'm definitely the type to put myself out rather than upset an acquaintance, so I'd probably end up going back. On the other hand, the way you described her soliloquy on all the "alternative folks" who patronize her establishment makes her sound almost as bigoted as her employee! I mean, she's certainly not mean-spirited about it, but what I heard was her rushing to assure you that she didn't support any negative thinking about gays -- they still stand out in her mind, they're still risque', but in a giggle-with-girlfriends-over-coffee way rather than a cross-streets-when-they-approach way. Does that make sense?

      Somehow that strikes me as almost worse than the people that mock you to your face. If she's so busy patting herself on the back for her "acceptance of an alternative lifestyle," can she really have any time left to get to know the real you?

      I don't know; maybe I'm reading too much into this at too late at night on too little sleep. It just seems like she would miss one of her gay customers more than she would miss Scott if you stopped coming, at least from the way you described talking to her.

      I think it's very sad that something that, when you get right down to it, directly affects so few people around one has such a profound effect on people's reactions to oneself. But then again, that's what millions of us have been saying for years, decades, isn't it?

      If it's any consolation, I'm female, engaged to a male, and 25, and I would say that most of the people anywhere near my age that I know, gay, straight, and everything in between (or outside?), couldn't care less who you partner as long as everything is consensual. My first experience with a homosexual couple was at age 9, when Emily joined my Girl Scout troop; Emily had two moms. It was pretty confusing for most of us then, growing up middle (well, most of them were actually significantly wealthier than I was, but I was middle) class and about 90% WASP; we were all pretty sheltered. However, by the time we finished high school, so many kids in my class had come out that very few of us honestly thought twice about it anymore. One of my male friends wore skirts and lipstick to high school, and DIDN'T GET BEAT UP. Compared to that, the girls who made out (yes, with each other) on the school lawn weren't that big a deal. The times, they are a'changin'.

      I'm not saying everything's peachy-keen; we've still got a long way to go. But I think there's hope that each generation will get a little (or a lot) more accepting of all kinds of diversity than the ones than went before.

      Sorry to just go off on a tangent, there. :)


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      somelikeitscott 10 years ago from Las Vegas

      Tom - thanks for the kudos, please keep watching and share it with your seven thousand closest friends!

      Paul - thank you for the comment and for starting the discussion with your family. While I try to use humor to diffuse any situation in my life, this was really about two things - 1. Standing up for myself for really the first time in my life and 2. Making sure that people understand there are repercussions to their behavior. The manager said she'd call me when the girl is fired and I agree with your father about forgiveness and will probably end up going back there at some point. The free dry cleaning idea is a good one but I all ready got my reward for going back and saying something instead of just pretending it didn't happen. Thanks again for watching!


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      Paul Edmondson 10 years ago from Burlingame, CA

      Scott, you're a great story teller! Our family discussed (My father, mom, wife, daughters) and we think you may have given the owner an opportunity to fire the employee and ask for free dry cleaning for a month.

      My father adds "Forgiveness is divine."

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      Tom 10 years ago

      Scott, Love the video blog! Your 100% correct for not taking that crap anymore and I can't wait to see more of your clips!