- Gender and Relationships»
- Romantic Intimacy
Your Favorite Man or Woman
This article is about that woman or man that just is always on your mind non stop. That person that you feel so in love with. I like to call them your favorite person because right now that person has such a huge impact in your life that everyone else may seem....distant (for lack of a better word). It can be a female or male (yes ladies believe it or not it happens to males too). For the purpose of this article I will explain the female emotions of when they have that favorite male in their life and the male emotions. I am not saying by any means this information is exact to every female and male but it is pieces from my behavior book brought in simple wording. So what are some of the emotions that goes through the mind's of the opposite sex? Read on if your curious.
HE IS ALL MINE
Your Favorite Male
Okay, I think every female will agree with me here that not every male they have dated or liked has been named their favorite male. They may have been charming and sweet but it takes more than that to have us DEEPLY connected. Now when a female does have a guy who makes that cut of being their favorite male (during this time) well it is a beautiful thing. A woman will see that male as hero to them (again for lack of better terms). They will enjoy all the simple things he does almost more than the obvious ones. Like how he always has this little boyish smile when he really finds something funny. Or involve herself with the things that interest him the most whether its art, music, clothing, football, etc. Typically when she not with him she will be daydreaming of things she and him could do together. Overall its kind of like an obsession. Just NOT the dangerous kind (I'm not saying it can't get dangerous in some women but that's a different story). The kind where no matter what anyone says especially if its negative she just doesn't take it in or seem to care. Now with that being said it can happen in reverse. What i stated above is for a female who is in a relationship with this male. This can happen even if the female is not in a relationship with this male. The only difference is that she maybe really shy about it. Or tries to keep it under wraps. The solo reason for this is because she may feel he is way out of league or that it would be impossible for her to be with him. Although this doesn't stop the obsession, sometimes it fuels it. Sometimes its the trill of what if for her. Or dreams she could transform into the type of woman he likes. Their is also one more twist on this. When a male she has known for awhile breaks it off meaning no more contact in anyway, so much to her it feels like a breakup (even if they wasn't officially dating) that the obsession grows. She may tell herself if i do or say this maybe he will see me. The whole idea is based on MAYBE. It is almost like an obsession with wanting him back that she watches his moves secretly. Then applies what she can to MAYBE gain back his interest. She may know its wrong but its an obsession. Which is a behavior that is hard to correct on its own. Now it can be beautiful when the male in question wants this behavior. Or delights in it. It is a different story when the male in question doesn't want this. Either way first step is seeing it for what it is. An obsession.
IN HIS EYES...
Your Favorite Woman
Well their is a male side to this story too. A male can be as crazy for a female as i have stated above. Males get obsessed too. It is very different for a male though. Now when a male is dating a female (that is his favorite woman right now) he finds her more sexy when she isn't trying to be sexy. Like when she is doing laundry or when she is cranky. He may think about her when he isn't doing anything. He may actually enjoy her rambling on and on because it is his excuse to look at her. He may get SUPER jealous when she speaks to another guy or even talks about one. This is a guy obsession with a female. He may not act like a cheese ball and say i love you over and over (some do). Although it is almost like she has this magic spell over him. Now lets switch gears and go in reverse. Sometimes the male isn't dating the female. He may stare at her and watch her from a distance. He will probably not speak to her. Simply because he doesn't know how she will react and public rejection is not taken well to the ego (sometimes). Or he could be the male that tries to give her advice all the time. The friend. So that she may hopefully see him for the guy he is. Now again their is another twist to this obsession. The male who can't move on. Now he may have lots of women (in this case, seemingly) that seem to have the attention. Although this male when no one is around may look at the females social pages or see her with some people she hangs around and really get upset secretly. He may just tell others he is in a bad mood but won't say why. Or you have the male that just won't date anyone since the break up and constantly keeps contacting the females. Either negatively or positively just to see if she will respond. To have her attention. No matter how you slice the cake it is called an obsession. Now i'm not talking serial killer obsession here. I'm talking about the kind that usually is the buddy to love. It is very beautiful and useful when with the female she may feel secure and protected or loved. If the female isn't interested this can get really ugly. QUICKLY. Females are very vocal creatures and she will be able to make you look like a crazy fool.
My final Advice
Now this is my own personal advice not taken or reworded from a book. Their really is all kinds and levels of obsession. The word obsession sounds worse than it really is because a lot of people think of murderers or stalkers. It is really not like that in some cases. It really can be a display of a deep emotional connection (to me). When in a relationship it can be healthy if you use it correctly or have the right guy. It is unhealthy when it is a breakup or when you just have these unrealistic views of that person. Sometimes when we really want someone so much your dreams do more than just bring you joy and comfort. You actually start to live in them. Meaning that you really convince yourself this person will come back or you could have this person. It can get deeper than that even. Like making up stories of being with them (which is something way deeper than i'm going or talking about for this article). Let me just end this with this, its not wrong to want someone. To view the good in someone. To look at someone and enjoy the simple things. Even to daydream about them. Obsession is not always a bad thing. Sometimes it attached to being in love. Although it is a very bad thing when you let it get out of control. It is okay not to move on right after a breakup. Or wonder why things got so messed up. It is NOT okay to be in the same spot 3 years later, still obsessing over this ex. It is NOT okay when your so deeply lost in your own daydreams that you don't allow yourself to forget or move forward with your REAL life. I hope you have enjoyed reading the article and if you wish you can leave comments at the bottom of the page. Thank you for reading and take care. Ciao :)