A Funeral for My 28 Year Marriage
Family, friends old and new, loved ones, online friends,
Please join me in sorrow and healing as I seek closure and inner peace.
On HubPages (the site this page is on - previously it was on the website Squidoo) I go by the name JJNW. Many of you know me by this, and many by my real name, Janienne. Some of you will not know me at all, but may find this in your own journey of healing. In any case, thank you for attending this virtual funeral for my marriage.
(Squidoo was) a place I feel safe and loved, hence my choice to host my service here. I thank the good people here for ongoing support, love, and encouragement.
Thank you for coming and being here for me and for my children.
(Photo Credit: Serenity Wreath by GiftTree, available at bottom of page)
My children and I have been abandoned.
After years of psychological, emotional and sometimes physical abuse, we are breaking free of strange, subtle and hidden kinds of control and mental manipulation.
We do not have the closure of a normal 'relationship-gone-bad.' Our pleas for answers go ignored.
We have not have the sympathy of others. No one has died.
We can hardly explain what has happened. It is almost unfathomable.
Until now, we have told only a very few.
We are afraid. We cry alone.
We hoped for change and kindness that did not come.
And now we come together with those we love, those who care, and whoever this may help.
This book is helping me to understand...
To those who know us as a couple...
I am so sorry for your loss.
I know your pain.
I am here for you.
This book helped as well.
I have no choice but to try to find closure...
to enable me to move forward and be strong for my children.
I am devastated and deeply hurt. The man with whom I expected to live the rest of my life has chosen another path. He chooses to lose us rather than admit the harm he has done and continues to do to his wife and children.
My kids and I have tried for months, years to ask to be treated with genuine loving kindness. There is nothing left to try.
Mourning Songs for My Marriage
(Click on each video to play or stop)
You've left me speechless, so speechless.
Please light a candle...
real or virtual,
in whatever way has meaning for you.
In this moment,
let us have solace
It is better to light a candle
than to curse the darkness.
Falling slowly, eyes that know me
And I can't go back
Moods that take me and erase me
And I'm painted black
You have suffered enough
And warred with yourself
It's time that you won
The following are quotes that have meaning for me. I know the end of a marriage is hard on anyone involved in any way. I share these with you in the hope you find comfort, strength and healing in them.
- If you want a happy ending, that depends, of course, on where you stop your story. - Orson Welles
- When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us. - Helen Keller
- If you are going through hell, keep going. - Winston Churchill
- Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end. - Unknown
- Thank you to Comfort Doc on Squidoo for sharing the following three quotes...
I don't believe I've ever met a person who hasn't been
challenged or wounded by something.
Difficulties present choices
We can either waste away from our wounds
or use them to grow our souls.
- The most beautiful people we have known
are those who have known defeat,
known suffering, known struggle, known loss,
and have found their way out of the depths.
These persons have an appreciation,
a sensitivity and an understanding standing of life
that fills them with compassion, gentleness
and a deep loving concern.
Beautiful people do not just happen.
- Out of every crisis comes the chance to be reborn,
to reconceive ourselves as individuals,
to choose the kind of change that will help us to grow
and to fulfill ourselves more completely.
My message to those who care for me...
Promise me you'll always remember:
You're braver than you believe,
and stronger than you seem,
and smarter than you think.
~ Christopher Robin to
Winnie the Pooh
Looking to the Future...
Squidoo, and now HubPages, help me be able work from home & be with my kids. That means everything.
These are some of the 200+ pages I have created and dearly love...
- Celebrating Sisters! I Love My Sister!
For my big sis; my forever friend.
- Best Quotes for Women - Friends, Mothers, and Grandmothers
- Uplifting Sensitive Funeral Music and Memorial Songs
Songs from my father's celebration of life & more