Its how I feel. I entered this relationship happily, for the first time in my life I felt I had a future with someone. I've been in 3 previous longterm relationships, the shortest being 2.5 years and the longest 5, but I had never spoken about marriage or spending the rest of my life with them. I was not even sure I believed in marriage until I entered this relationship and to be honest his desire to marry me and all the emotional turmoil that came with it when we started going out made me think about marriage for the first time in my life. A month into our relationship he wanted to go to Vegas to marry me, I turned that down because it was a month into a relationship, It was very enticing and adventorous, and if it had been I would have done it because I know that if anything went wrong afterwards I could divorce, but with him I wanted something special and he agreed after we talked. ANd he then told me to get my suitcases ready for october or november, and when october came, nothing happened and when november came nothing happened then valentines came and he told me he wanted to marry me this year (2010) and 2010 went by, and now I can't stop but think he is fooling me around. And he is so nice, and I adore him to bit. I simply love him, but I can't stop feeling this pain and i want out! I don't want to feel this insecure adn i want to stop thinking about marriage, I gave up my job, i moved towns, i started a business with him, i feel trapped and to be honest its scary, i think i am so foolish.