Each of us knows our strengths and weaknesses, what we can tolerate and what is intolerable to us personally. I have found that most people are resistant to change and patterns remain repeated. I feel the predictability of negative behavior patterns in itself can, at best, stagnate and at worst, defeat relationships. For example, I met a man at work that found out I was getting a divorce. I'd known him casually for some time prior to my plans and used to catch him staring at me or getting tongue-tied trying to make small talk in passing during the workdays. He turned me off with too much expensive cologne, primped coif and worked-out, pumped up body. In short, he was more vain than I. I also recognized that he was smart enough to size up and approach, which led me to the assumption he was well practiced. I was vulnerable at the time of my divorce and consented to a quick drink after work, which was relaxing and fun. He read me like a book and said all the right things, falsely appearing caring and interested. When I was moving into my apartment, working all day at my job, loading up my Miata to the gills every night, stopping to unload my car on the way home and repeating the process the next day, he asked to see my apartment one afternoon following work. He came into the apartment and attempted to grope me, never even asking if he could carry one item into my new digs. I knew my initial impression of him was spot on. His self-centered ego and lack of impulse control still rules and does not inhibit him calling me to "see how I'm doing" and ask me out "to catch up". I had the courage to leave an unsatisfying marriage, why would he think that the little he has to offer to a relationship would interest me at all? I thank my lucky stars I am not his "Mrs". He might think he is "smarter" than me; but then, again, he's not thinking with his brain. Now, when the phones rings and I can see it is him, I ignore his persistent calls, just like he ignored my packed car and my need for a little help. And, this is just one small instance where familiarity breeds contempt.