Never put your children in the middle of the battle. They are half of both of you. Whatever you say negative about your counterpart can reflect on how they see themselves. Don't make them choose. They are supposed to love you both. Even if he's a deadbeat Dad or she loves her job more than being a Mother. Let your children be, children, don't take their childhoods from them by filling it full of pain and anguish. It lasts such a short time, let them be children. Never lie to them but don't put them in the middle of an adult conversation or debate. Don't have knock down drag outs in front of them. No matter what the two of you are going through, love them like your lives depend on it. In case you didn't know, it does. Good Luck, Dee.