What would be a good reason to lie?

1. 80

   joanwzposted 11 years ago

   What would be a good reason to lie?
   
   What would be a bad reason to lie?

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2. 86

   rdlang05posted 11 years ago

   Contrary to what popular culture would have you believe, there is never a good reason to lie to your spouse or significant other (and really anyone).  If someone's wife asks them if the dress makes them look fat (and it does) there are better (and more intelligent ways) of handling the situation than telling a "little white lie".  Relationships are build on communication and trust, and even little white lies, especially if made habitual, can snowball into greater relationship problems.  People deserve honesty, but they should also realize that there is a time and place for things to be expressed, and need to be satisfied with honesty at the most prudent moment.  Sometimes people just need time to cool off or think things over before they express themselves.

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   1. 80

      joanwzposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      TIming is everything, for sure. Do you think the truth should be withheld if it would hurt someone?

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   2. 86

      rdlang05posted 11 years agoin reply to this

      I think it depends on a lot of things... do they have the right to know?  Can they "handle" it?  Are you telling them in order to hurt them, or because in the long run it will be better for them?  All these are factors I think.

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   3. 73

      austinhealyposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Does that dress make me look fat?. No guy in his right mind is going to say yes and face the risk of being in the doghouse forever. If someone asks that question, she knows the answer, so she expects a lie. Nothing but a trick question

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   4. 86

      rdlang05posted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Woman: "does this dress make me look fat?"
      Man: "That dress doesn't do you justice, try this one..."
      
      Problem solved.

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      MamaTschetposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      rd, you have a beautiful way of looking at things.  I believe if my husband did just what you said, I of course would know I looked fat in the dress, but he loves me and is trying to help.  Enjoying this answer thread.

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3. 81

   dashingscorpioposted 11 years ago

   In order to give the best answer to this question one would have to know in what context a lie is being considered and the motivation for telling the lie.
   Are we talking about telling kids about Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, and Easter Bunny? Exaggerating one's responsibilities for a former employer on a resume to get a job?, Telling a little girl she is "beautiful" when you know she is not a mainstream beauty?
   In my opinion a bad reason to lie would be (having the intention) to hurt someone, take advantage of them in a variety of ways (financially, emotionally, physically) and after you've gotten everything out of them you can get, you dump them. The core foundation for any meaningful relationship is Honesty.

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   1. 80

      joanwzposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      I see what you're saying about the context. Would you tell a lie to the other party during a lawsuit? What about lies of omission, where you keep silent so the other person is left in the dark?

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   2. 81

      dashingscorpioposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      It’s been said; The first law of nature is self-preservation. I might lie rather than face a severe punishment especially if the truth might elicit physical harm. Lying (by omission) to avoid getting involved in a dispute between others is common.

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4. 73

   austinhealyposted 11 years ago

   There is no good or bad reason to lie. Every case is a case on its own. The idea than nobody should ever lie, although wishable, is highly unrealistic. I mean some people lie for a living : politicians, advertising people, religious people, some journalists, you name it, and everybody gets along those "professional" lies.
   It all depends on what's at stake, and how much somebody wants to save the day, even at the cost of lying a little. I'm not an advocate of lying, and  I certainly don't enjoy being lied to. But we are humans, therefore imperfect and flawed. Let's just live with it

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5. 63

   Globetrekkermelposted 11 years ago

   The question is hard to justify nor defend.On the other hand, the severity of the lie has a bearing to whether there is ever a good or bad reason to lie.I don't like to lie but there had been times where i was pinned to the wall and had no recourse but not to comment and try to divert the question i was being asked. In my opinion that is not lying though. But  had i answered and told the truth , I can jeopardize the situation I was presently in  and there might be unpleasant consequences that i will have to deal with. so ,TO LIE OR NOT TO LIE? That's still a question that i am struggling with when i am faced with a question that can compromise me in an uncomfortable situation.

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6. 67

   Ceegenposted 11 years ago

   Never a good reason to lie. There is no way to justify it. Even in the most seemingly harmless of situations, lying becomes a cancer that doesn't stop. This is cearly evident in the human condition of using deception to get what we want, whatever it may be. It can be narrowed down to two categories: lying to others, and, lying to self.
   
   Now, take this seemingly harmless, and yet awkward question: Am I overweight?
   
   No one wants to tell another person that they're fat. But what if we all just told the truth, no matter what? What if, instead of crying and whining about our situation as if we were powerless to do anything, we tackled the problem head-on? What if, instead of making excuses as to why we're overweight, we just started to watch our food intake, and exercise more?
   
   (Now, don't take that to the other extreme, and just not eat: That is unhealthy. Yes, I know how hard it is to start an exercise regimen, so stop planning on doing it, and just do it already.)
   
   America is the most overweight nation in the world, and consequently we also have the most health problems of any nation. Diabetes, coronary diseases, low energy levels, etc.. Even if you're only 30 lbs over weight, that is a lot of weight to lug around all day. Put 30 lbs in a backpack, and take it with you where-ever you go, and see how quickly you get tired.
   
   I know, I've gone on quite a bit about being overweight. That isn't my point. My point is that we should avoid lying to other people, no matter how hard it may hurt. And it isn't like people don't have an idea that you're lying to them, so lying to someone always leaves the possibility that they one day find out you were lying to them, and you lose their trust!
   
   Yeah, you might hurt someone's feelings... But if they're really a friend or whatever, they'll respect you for your honesty. Tact goes a long way, too.
   
   But the other aspect of this whole situation is not lying to other people, but lying to ones self. It is a much more deadly and cancerous thing. When we lie to ourselves, we become blind to the thing that is destroying us... Whatever it may be - And the spiritual application to that is there, if you so choose to see it.
   
   God bless.

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7. 73

   grumpiornotposted 11 years ago

   I am not a fan of answering a question with a question, but cannot decide how to answer your question otherwise:
   Is omitting the truth also a lie? That is to say, can you lie by omitting information or only by actively telling an untruth.
   I find it difficult to lie because it feels morally wrong but have recently had the opportunity to consider whether I should volunteer the truth or simply keep quiet...

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8. 68

   Admiral Murrahposted 11 years ago

   Although lying is disapproved of, it occurs routinely in many professions. It not only occurs, it is expected and tolerated as part of doing business by the public. read more

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   mary615posted 11 years ago

   I am guilty of telling a lie to keep from hurting someone's feelings.  This is a subject that has always made me wonder, so  much so that I wrote a Hub about lying.  I think everyone is guilty of lying for various reasons.
   We all seem to justify our lying, but lying is breaking the 9th. commandment.

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10. 59

    Goody5posted 11 years ago

    Lying isn't right by any means, but if I had to answer this question then I would have to say to protect my children.

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