It seems like when people hear about others waiting for marriage that they assume something is wrong with that person. Is waiting for marriage before sex an outdated idea? Do men (Christian or non-Christian) value this in a woman? Has any woman ever found a man that waited for marriage?
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Great answer. Thanks for all of the information. I agree with your stand on this topic. It just seems like it is never talked about or expected anymore.
I personally know of two couples that got married before having sex with each other. Ironically it is the women who are unhappy. Pre-marital sex has never been listed as "the cause" for divorce. Marrying the wrong person is the number one reason! :-)
I could definitely agree that it wouldn't be "the reason." But it's definitely a contributor, which is why it has always been sanctified in every culture. By the way, thank you for a valuable comment that wasn't simply intended to argue.
And this is something I value and applaud
Not a weird reason at all. It's very cool of you. Without being religious you are basically waiting for much of the same reason as those that are religious.
I much agree that, if you have the discipline for it, it is much wiser to wait for that one person who treats you love and respect and someone you can trust. A man or woman who is willing to forego their sexual desires is a keeper.
It's cool when famous people take a positive stand on things that aren't exactly popular with the mainstream. Whether we like it or not, celebs are role models for their fans so it is good when they are being positive.
I was raised with traditional Christian values regarding sex before marriage, but have since reconsidered. I believe you have an excellent point. It makes no sense to buy a car without test driving it.
Which studies are these? I'm always interested to see research that completely contradicts each other.
It was an article in one of the Psychology Today magazines. Interesting that you quote from a Christian website.
That is definitely the first place I saw the source I talked about, but not the source I quoted from. I made a point of keeping religion out of my answer. The article was from the Journal of Family Psychology. Do you remember the article name?
No, I do not. The college library is where I used to read them.
I agree that people should wait for marriage. It is a good point about the rise of disease, too. I believe that it would slow the spread of these illnesses. There are tons of peer pressure out there so it does make it hard to do the right thing.
Much, much agreed! Many don't engage in responsible sex and the fate of unborn children resulting from these couplings must be considered. It is also important to limit sex to men who make good husband material.
Did you wait til you were married Terryk81? You can't preach on it if you're doing it.
Does anybody preach about anything that they haven't done in some way fashion or form?
I definitely agree with you about the part that children need to be considered when engaging in pre-marital sex until birth control is used religiously. There is always a good chance that pre-marital sex can result in single motherood
This is confusing. So would you prefer for your woman to wait until marriage to have sex or not?
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Picking the right spouse is not an exact science. I'm sure there are those who "saved themselves" for marriage and soon realized they married a "unmitigated loser". As you noted having had sex prior to marriage helps your focus on other traits.
Cool. Thanks for a male's perspective on this.