Do you think that women feel pressured to have a child by age 35?

1. 81

   jaydawg808posted 10 years ago

   Do you think that women feel pressured to have a child by age 35?
   
   Because after that age, chances of conceiving drop dramatically?

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2. 73

   lburmasterposted 10 years ago

   YES! Also if your partner is close to the age of 35, you feel pressure to have children before you are ready. My husband is close to that age and we had wondered when to have children. It felt as if we were on a time crunch, as if once he reached 35 something would be wrong with our children. Because not only do the chances of conceiving drop dramatically but the chances of your children having ADD, ADHD, etc. increase dramatically because of the "old" sperm. Ugh, it's so frustrating! However, we've already had our first little boy While I don't desire more children so soon (he is more than us to keep up with), we have been considering a second.

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3. 94

   MsDoraposted 10 years ago

   Women feel pressured to have children, some from day one; but I think they really become desperate around 35, for the reasons given in another answer.  It's time we start to celebrate women just for who they are; then they won't feel so pressured to fulfill the expectations of society.  Women always have opportunity to use their maternal nurturing skills, whether or not the children are biological.

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   1. 83

      gmwilliamsposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      ++++++ applauses to you!

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4. 76

   Rob Wintersposted 10 years ago

   Whilst it's quite common nowadays to leave starting a family to later than was the case a generation ago i'd certainly think women are very conscious of the so called 'biological clock' factor. I've frequently heard younger women (early to mid-twenties) state that they'd like to have a child by the time they're 28 or before they're 30 or some such condition and likewise often heard women in their 30's intimate that they're running out of time.
   
   I've also seen younger women showing sensitivity when discussing this issue around slightly older women particularly if the older women in question are not in a relationship so i'd definitely say there's an awareness among women that many women feel pressured or at least self concsious about this issue.I've also heard women comment on how men don't have to worry about this issue indicating that they do feel there is a pressure around this on them that men don't experience (at least not quite in the same way).

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5. 81

   MissMelissaKposted 10 years ago

   I think the "pressure" is more internal than external.  As I get older, I find that people really just don't care what you do with respect to having children.  If your self-worth is defined by external things like having a husband and children, you are more likely to choose the wrong person or discover that having children was the worst decision ever.  I have redefined my sense of self-worth with my Christian faith as a beautiful child of God.  I am no longer the woman without a family.  I am precious in God's eyes with or without a family.  Amen.

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   1. 83

      gmwilliamsposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you my sister,you intelligently and eloquently elucidated a good point.So many women are pressured to have children and they have them much to THEIR & the child's regret So many women DON'T think before having children-they succumb to press

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6. 61

   duffsmomposted 10 years ago

   I have a daughter in this situation. She is 28 and feels that if they are going to have children, they should do it soon.  But yet, she doesn't feel ready for kids.
   
   So I do believe that women feel a certain pressure about having children before a certain age due to chances of conceiving, health of the baby, but also being older parents raising kids in a youth oriented world.
   
   I was 30 and 33 when my kids were born and while it didn't bother me, I did notice that when they were in school, wow the parents of kids seemed so much younger than us.

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   1. 83

      gmwilliamsposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      Tell your daughter do not have children until SHE is ready.The 30s, preferably,mid-30s are the right time to have children.One is mature and has lived life.Even the 40s AREN'T too old to have children.So many women have children TOO young &REGRET

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7. 83

   gmwilliamsposted 10 years ago

   
   
   It all depends upon the respective socioeconomic and sociocultural factors.  Some women are pressured by family and their particular sociocultural group to have children young.  Such proponents maintain that the earlier one has children, the better.  These proponents assert that once a woman reaches her mid-30s, it is too late to have children. 
   
   Then there are women, especially those from highly educated and highly affluent backgrounds who were imbued with the importance of  a woman exploring and finding out who she is before settling into marriage/parenthood. These women were further imbued that it is best to have children according to the F.E.P. principle. 
   
   That principle is that before one has children, his/her financial, emotional, and psychological preparedness should be in high gear.  Many highly educated and highly affluent women don't feel pressured to have children before 35.  In fact. many of them are advised AGAINST having children before 35 as the period before 35 is when they are working on and establishing their careers.
   
   Note: Many women who have children before they were ready oftentimes have an underlying resentment towards their children. They feel tied down as they have missed career and educational  opportunities.  They also feel as if their youth was taken away from them.
   
   Au contraire, women who have had children in their 30s are more contented as they have fulfilled their respective educational and career opportunities.   They have also LIVED, so they have NO REGRETS regarding what could have been.  They are happier as a result of fulfilling their respective career/educational choices, so they are more contented and fulfilled mothers than the women who had children before they were ready or had them too young.

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