If a woman is attracted to a woman, why does one of them need to be masculine? And if a man is attracted to a man, why does one of them need to be feminine?
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About "dyke" - I think some women just "reclaim" the word, like gay men calling each other "f-g" or even like black men using the n word. Since you're bi it's a bit different, but I'd be mad if a straight person called me a dyke. :( Still derogatory.
I have to ask do you present yourself as male? Cut all your hair off, hide your breast? Those are the women I know who don't mind being called a dyke. Though I'll admit it isn't a word I normally say unless in a close group of people I know are ok.
No, I'm not a "butch" lesbian, but I HAVE been called dyke by homophobic straight people, as well as f-g. If a close friend or gay person says it in a joking way, I don't care, but it's been used against me as an attack, so... yeah.
These terms are stereotypical to men or women. They are stigmas created by a few. But, they don't fit most. The number of gay people that fit this term are few. To most, sexuality is private and not advertised. Except those that are promiscuous.
Not if it infringes on my families values. How do you explain to a 4 year old why 2 men are kissing in public?? Advice please?
I explain to them that everyone is different and people love who they love. Why should I teach my children to discriminate? In my eyes, disliking others for being different would be far worse than a child seeing two people share a kiss.
Are you really serious? Two men kissing in public in front of your children will have no ill effect on this young child? Is this what this country has come to? Just because someone wants to commit a crude act in public, a child is confused for weeks?
Well, I try to not include ALL in anything I say online or in person. I don't really think I implied ALL here, did I? I better go back and look! But even some like you say, I'm just looking to understand. I have some in my family too.
A 4 year old doesn't see a kiss as a crude act. Most 4 years olds wouldn't give it a second thought unless their parents freaked out about it. Older children should know that not everyone is the same & that doesn't make someone "bad" just differ
Well, mine did. And wouldn't you know it. Three days later is a talk with her teacher in pre-school that she is kissing other students? Coincidence? I will not even kiss in front of this child. And yes, she asked me why they did this.
A kiss is an expression of affection. I'd simply tell my child when it is and is not appropriate to display the behavior and be done with it.
Thank you Christin.
I am old school. PDAs make me uncomfortable. Holding hands and pecks are cool, love hugs. But anything even kind of sexual in public makes me cringe. What sex don't matter.
If your child sees two men kissing in public, tell your child they are from Argentina. No joke, that's how Argentinians greet one another.
JThomp. What if up the road, your daughter tells you that she is more attracted to an alternative life style other than the one you have already planned for her? Will you still love her? Can you explain why or why not? It could happen. Be ready if so
My kids have seen 2 men kissing & they didn't even notice or care. Seeing 2 men kissing will effect kids only if parents teach that it should. People also used to teach their kids that blacks & whites shouldn't drink from the same water fount
SmartAndFun....... That is apples and oranges. How dare you compare what African Americans went through to this vile lifestyle. All I can say is what are you people thinking??
We're thinking it isn't right to judge people as vile simply because we do not think like them or love like them. What is vile to me is discrimination in any form against people for simply being different.
JThomp - also, here's some advice for what to tell your daughter. "Sometimes, when two grown-ups love each other very much, they kiss! It's normal and just means they are really in love. But it isn't something for kids!" There, easy. :)
ChristinS.. It is totally apparent that you have become an adult with a totally different moral fibers than I. Some countries "tolerate" juvenile prostitution. They just look the other way. Does this make it right? Toleration does not = right decisi
All I can say to that JThomp is "Good" I am happy to have moral fiber that doesn't feel the need to judge other consenting adults for their own private lives. Comparing this to child prostitution? Wow, just wow...
Christin..... the point I am trying to make is if society deems something tolerable it does not make it right. Do you feel drugs should be used in coffee shops? Should prostitution be legal? Well, this is the direction in which this accepting is goin
Referring to your response to Sm&Fun. If we are thinking anything different than you, you see us as wrong. That world of isolation, disguised as "moral fiber", must be very lonely. Open-mindedness is freedom. Allow others to be themselves: pricel
JT, I am comparing discrimination to discrimination. Sexual orientation is not a moral issue. I realize you will never see it that way, just as my 80-year-old father-in-law will never feel in his heart that blacks deserve equal treatment.
IDONO........ I am only speaking about what I believe. This country is going to hell in a hand basket because of those who "tolerate" this vile behavior that is clearly "NOT" moral nor behavior that is pleasing to God. R U A Christian IDONO??
Disagreeing with something ppl do is fine but calling those ppl vile because u don't like what they do actually speaks volumes about you not them. Vile behavior can be hate, discrimination, and intolerance and I see plenty of that in some Christians.
My Bible tells me this behavior is not acceptable. I will stand by this until i MEET my maker. God almighty. Why don't you people mind your own business and quit interrupting threads?? I am sickened by your opinions. One day you will see the truth.
Who/what is the 'you people' you're referring to? Those that disagree with ur belittling of ur fellow man? Go back and read the words you spoke publicly about ur fellow man and then tell me who sounds like the Christian here you or me. Funny that.
I feel sorry that you find comfort in name calling. Again, who sounds like the Christian here, you or me? Jesus loves everyone, certainly can't say the same about you. U are one his people correct? It certainly does not show in you.
JT: Quit throwing tantrums on other people's space. You asked if I were Christian. Yes. And God may not be happy with this gay issue. But, I'm not God. And neither are you. We are God's followers; not enforcers. Let him judge and worry about yourself
I agree; it is not correct to say every gay relationship "needs" to have that dynamic of masculine and feminine.
I NEVER said EVERY. And I don't see how this could be compared to straight really. I just don't see.
Stop comparing it to straight relationships. You don't see because you are looking for something that isn't there. You seem a little obsessed with your inability to understand it. Stop trying so hard, it's really quite simple.
Not comparing to Straight. It's not really comparable to Straight.
This is closer to what I was seeking. I didn't intend for this to be a debate for pro and/or against gays. I was trying to understand. Not comparing but as a straight, I just wouldn't want my man to be dressed as a "woman".
I don't think I am damning anyone by trying to understand. I can't be really very blunt here, but I don't think some are seeing my point.
You should be more blunt then, because it's hard to see what you are REALLY asking. People are trying to answer you question as politely as they can considering that the question you posed sounds a bit bigoted. Did you mean to ask something else?
A relationship is a life team and all successful teams have a team leader. In these relationships you speak of, someone has to take the lead and someone has to concede.Right or wrong, history has shown male domination throughout. Maybe that's why. ??
What about Bi-sexuals?
Bi-sexuals are no different. It just means that the person they find attractive could be male or female.
What about the levels of their hormones?
JThomp - being straight, gay or bi has nothing to do with your sex drive. Every individual is different. If that's what you mean about "hormone levels"... Great comment, M.T. Dremer. The relationships aren't different, only how society treats them.
JThomp - lol is that your usual reaction to science..? Check out the American Pschology Association (APA) website if you want more info - it's a lot more substantial than biases and accusations.
I was talking to M.T. about this hormone level thing. I just do not understand any of it. Just my opinion. I do not need to understand. Have a great day.
My question is do you still want to be a woman? Or would you rather be a man? Because you are attracted to women.
To add: my point is that stereotypes don't define our genders. I could accuse a straight couple, too, if the wife likes sports and the man likes to cook - but we know that's silly, right? For any couple, we should focus on people, not societal norms.
Thank you Aliasis. I know a lesbian couple who are both masculine. I get what you are saying. It is difficult to elaborate on this because this is public forum.
That's an interesting concept. Thank you for your opinion.
I think it's deeper than just "appearance", don't you?
Ask them. You may be surprised. I have known some river runner gals and athletes, that just seem naturally alpha. I do not see any feminine qualities in Nancy Pelosi. I doubt that is what would attract a woman to them. But maybe. Murderers have loves
I'm not sure it is deeper than appearance, some people tend to care what society's perception is and will try to adhere to it. Eric, I ask a gay friend, he said they are probably not comfortable with themselves
Seems to me you are right to a degree. Like a "Napolean" complex. I must say that normally they are defensive about it,,,, which is a red flag to me. (in my experience)
It goes deeper than appearance Alpha. Good point on Pelosi, Eric. It seems odd that one would go out of their way to perform & be like the opposite of their attraction. That's my point. It would be like me asking my man to dress as a woman. Odd.
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