The best advice is to find a man who (already) does the kinds of things you want. Trying to get someone to do something they don't want to is the same as trying to "change" them. I've never met anyone who said; "I'm looking for someone to change me!"
Most people want to be loved and accepted for who (they) are.
When we attempt to change someone it usually leads to frustration on our part and resentment on the part of our mate.
All we can do is directly ask for what we want. There are basically 2 reasons why your mate wouldn't give you what you've asked for.
1. They don't have it to give. (In other words it's not who they are.)
2. They don't believe you are worth the effort.
More often than not it's #1. If someone thinks you are worth the effort they will generally make the effort. However no one can give you what is not in them to give.
Only you can decide if not getting what you want is an actual "deal breaker". Keep in mind perfection is an illusion.
There are only two ways to experience joy and peace of mind in relationships; we either get what we want or we learn to be happy with what we have. We either stay or continue our search.