Only (you) know what traits you're looking for in a mate!
Each of us (chooses) our own friends, lovers, and spouse.
Ideally you have done the necessary introspective thinking to figure out what you want and need in a mate (before) pursuing a relationship.
To do otherwise is the equivalent of going shopping without a list!
People who do this tend to allow "impulsive connections" and "happenstance" to dictate their relationship choices.
Never separate your mind from your heart when making relationship decisions. The purpose of the mind is to protect the heart.