How do I deal with a man that does not take responsibility....

1. 53

   DebsVposted 7 years ago

   How do I deal with a man that does not take responsibility....
   
   He withholds intimacy and tells me I need to be patient and wait for him to come to me .... Which could be weeks of waiting

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2. 92

   FatFreddysCatposted 7 years ago

   He sounds like a major douche. You need to kick him to the curb.

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   1. 53

      DebsVposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Thnx for responding Keith. The problem is we are not even 6 months married and says I am ""demanding""something from him that he is not able to naturally do. I have such a difficult time accepting that, he was so doting and caring before marriage ?

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3. 87

   tamarawilhiteposted 7 years ago

   For a MAN to refuse sex with a partner, unless he's religious and/or a virgin, he's probably cheating on the side.

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   1. 79

      dashingscorpioposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      He may be "in the closet" to avoid disappointing his parents and others. It's not unheard of  for men in heterosexual relationships or marriages to later "come out".

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   2. 53

      DebsVposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      I know that he is not cheating... I would KNOW, trust me.... Been there before and not naive, his ass would be to the curb !!!. I have more than 30 Yrs of marriage behind me. I would rather be alone than be unhappy ... He knows it !!!!

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   3. 79

      dashingscorpioposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      DebsV, It sounds like you ARE unhappy but you're not alone.

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   4. 53

      DebsVposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      dashingscorpio, I am not happy right now and don't know if the damage of his behaviour can be reversed. I feel Iike a total loser and of no fault of mine , except making a wrong choice !!!

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   5. 79

      dashingscorpioposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      DebsV,, Don't be so hard on yourself!
      You are not alone. According to Psychology Today 20% of all marriages are sexless. (1 in 5).
      Some folks choose to accept it, others have affairs, and some file for divorce. Making a decision is tough.

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4. 79

   dashingscorpioposted 7 years ago

   
   
   Each of us (chooses) our own friends, lovers, and spouse.
   If you're not getting what you want he's not "the one" for you!
   Everyone has their own "mate selection criteria".
   If intimacy is important to (you) then you have to decide why you chose someone who withholds it.
   If you go to the store to purchase an apple but buy an onion instead whose fault is that? Do you curse the onion for not being an apple?
   No! You learn to become a "better shopper"!
   The most unrealistic expectation one can have is expecting someone to become (who they are not) or do what's not natural for (them).
   People generally only change when (they) are unhappy.
   There are only two ways to experience joy and peace of mind in relationships: We either get what we want or we learn to be happy with what we have. Accept them (as is) or move on.
   You're responsible for your own happiness!
   The world may not owe you anything but you owe yourself the world!

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   1. 53

      DebsVposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Absolutely I am responsible for whatever I choose in my life .... I have chosen not to SETTLE... By having a very open and necessary discussion with my hubby and have let him know .... I choose not be an an option in his life, NOT negotiable!!!

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