Love is a personal, intimate decision. We don't normally love strangers, nor do we have the emotional capacity to love a lot of people. (Dunbar's number puts the human social network at 150.)
Judging others is not immoral or hate. Saying murder is wrong and locking up or executing a murderer doesn't have to involve hate - it involves preventing that murderer from killing anyone else. Saying cheating on your spouse is wrong is respect for the faithful one being cheated on. Saying childbearing outside of marriage is wrong is a reflection of real world statistics - children born to unwed mothers are three times as likely to become mentally ill, addicts, homeless, held back in school, arrested. Parents just living together break up 80% of the time before the kid is 10, married parents are together 80% of the time until kids are grown. If you want to help children, you don't endorse family creation where they have three times greater odds of failing - and WAY greater odds of growing up in poverty.