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Empowerment: How True Love Follows

Updated on October 25, 2017
Find yourself first. There is only one of you. Empowering yourself first will help you see more clearly when it comes to relationships
Find yourself first. There is only one of you. Empowering yourself first will help you see more clearly when it comes to relationships | Source

You must be courageous

In order to get to a point in life where God can bring you the right mate, you must first face your loneliness and discouragement with great courage.

Discover who you are first and what things you like
Discover who you are first and what things you like | Source

Fall in love with yourself first

Don't wait for someone to love you. Fall in love with yourself first.

You first.

Your hopes. Your dreams.


Find yourself first.

Find yourself first. Love yourself first. The rest will follow.
Find yourself first. Love yourself first. The rest will follow. | Source

There is a degree of contact that starts first in any one relationship. A subtle look. A sexy smile. A breathtaking eye contact with the person you can envision spending the rest of your life with.

Or, there is always the one time look that leaves a lasting impression.

Before you can get started, there has to be a desire deep within you to be with someone. To not be alone. To share a passionate intimacy only love can bring you.

Notice I said a passionate intimacy only love can bring you.

Confused? Every one should be confused enough at first to have the courage and step out in faith to study about true love before sinking into a relationship, especially a sexually active one.

It is also important to note the Bible makes sex perfectly clear in its moral boundaries. Emotional ones are never mentioned because emotions are like broken shards of shattered glass. If you are foolish enough to tread bare foot across them, you will end up with pain and severe lashes that take time to heal.

You may end up with deep gouges and even worse emotional scars.

Scars can heal somewhat, you can cover them up; but a scar leaves a lasting impression that follows you for the rest of your life. Scars never fully heal. They are still there, long after the pain has subsided.

God said it is not good for man to be alone. He said it for good reason. No one really wants to be alone unless they have an iron willed determination to stay single.

How can God bring you the right one if you are not willing to search yourself, see yourself and work on yourself first?

There is a saying: "The potter of the clay is the master". How can the artist sculpt a masterpiece or vessel worthy to be used if they don't know what they're doing?

In other words, the master or artist has been trained to complete a task. They know what they are doing; they know how to get the finished product and on what road to take to get it there but in order to reach that level of empowerment in their lives, they first had to search themselves.

You must first search yourself for who you were meant to be, empowered by God's divine hand in your life before you know where in the world you are going in life.

Up to that point, a relationship should not be an option.

Loneliness may feel like a death sentence, when in reality, you need to look in the mirror and search yourself. Most people do not want to be alone.

If you are afraid to see who you really are, then how will you see any one significant other in your life for who they are?

You will not see them for who they are until you quit being blind sided with the truth: you need to be empowered yourself before you can handle any relationship.

You will also find in life that when you desire to be with someone, most often someone will come along.

You may get the sudden twinge in your guts, nervous from your naive head all the way down to your shaking toes when you see them. You clam up. You hold your breath at their presence. You grasp your stomach from the excited feeling and think that if you could only hold it all in, that will keep you from exploding out and pulling them up against you in a passionate embrace.

You think you are in love.

But God is love and if you haven't searched yourself and truly know who you are, after time, your emotions that have just driven you crazy physically to the point of screaming are nothing more than in vain.

You are not in love. You are in lust.

Once you see who you are, empowering yourself first before delving into a relationship, you may change your view of that person you thought you wanted so badly.

The nervous squeal you once had would quickly be replaced by nausea every time that person comes into your presence.

God gives mercy and grace daily and he restores with a never ending passion no sexual act can compare to.

It takes time to get to know someone. Why wouldn't it take time to be empowered yourself, living your life and serving a purpose you were destined to do?

Stop what you are doing.

Learn to draw strength from the Lord, relishing in the fact that God loves you, he created you for a purpose and it may not involve a significant other until you finally do inventory on yourself, empowering yourself first before working on a relationship.

© 2012 April Savage


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    • april holland profile imageAUTHOR

      April Savage 

      7 years ago from Florida

      Thank you mattdigiulio! I had to learn the hard way with disastrous relationships that I had to know myself first! Thanks for the comment.

    • mattdigiulio profile image


      7 years ago

      This is a very useful hub that should be read by EVERYONE. Voting up, awesome, beautiful.

    • april holland profile imageAUTHOR

      April Savage 

      7 years ago from Florida

      Well the truth is the truth here SubRon7. Those women knew what they wanted, and they also knew the relationship would eventually end with you anyway. Why? Because if you are not a Christian, living right and not saved and they are, you will not understand them for who they are anyway. They knew this and was the wiser to step away from you. Sorry, but I am a Christian and even I know I have to be with a man that shares the same Biblical principles I do. And there is no such thing as "in the middle". Sounds like you need to be empowered yourself and search yourself first!

    • SubRon7 profile image

      James W. Nelson 

      7 years ago from eastern North Dakota

      April, I began reading your hub because I usually read anything that can help me find a woman to love, but as soon as religion appeared I stopped reading. Several years ago I met a really great young woman, I really liked her, but then I found out that I had to be "saved" first, before we could even begin to develop a relationship. Actually, that happened with two young women. I don't want to find the love of my life in a bar, either, but please, someone in the middle!

      I do agree though with the caption under your second photo, but I think God has had me long enough!


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