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A Flawless Way to Meet Women

Updated on December 25, 2011
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The Approach

Since the dawn of time, every man has seen himself as the greatest man to walk the earth. His combination of charm, intellect, bow-staff skills, and computer hacking skills make him the ultimate union of brains and brawn. He is the infatuation of every woman. Well, he would be - if only they would take the time to get to know him...

And what can a man do to get a woman to give him that time?

The typical "expert" on meeting women would tell this honorable man that he simply needs to go out there, act like a jerk and look like a fool, and eventually he will woo the right woman. Pretend to be someone you're not, and the women will love you!

But wait, aren't you already the man that other men want to be? Your Warcraft character is at 78. You can juggle 5 balls at a time. You have the worlds best mom who taught you how to be a champion in the kitchen. Why do you need to pretend?

You don't! The right woman will be crazy about your mad skills - you are confident of that. If only there was a way to start that initial conversation without looking like a fool...

It's scary, after all. If she has a boyfriend, you get rejected. If she doesn't like your type, you get rejected. If she is with friends who don't like your type, you get rejected. It's a lose-lose tragedy! If she's just a jerk, then you get shot down embarrassingly. If she's a nice person but has a boyfriend, you still get shot down AND you've made her feel terrible about herself because you forced her to feel like a jerk.

Is there any way to initiate that first conversation without making things uncomfortable for both of you?

Yes. We just need an approach that will:

  1. Reveal your classiness.
  2. Give the woman a polite way out.
  3. Create a situation where a rejection benefits, rather than hinders, your opportunities to meet other women.

Is this possible? Could such a suave form of introduction be just a few lines of text away?

Would I be arrogant to say "Yes"?

The Honesty Method

You notice a beautiful woman across the room. She's charming, entertaining, perfect. How do you talk to her?

In the past the process would have gone like this:

  1. You stare at her for 30 minutes from across the room making awkward eye contact.
  2. As you finally approach her you come up with an excuse: "another guy just started talking to her", "she's not my type", "I'll try again tomorrow", "I wet my pants", "I _______ (insert excuse here)" and simply walk away.
  3. You go home confident that the woman of your dreams will one day man up and start a conversation with you - which mind you, is exactly what the woman is looking for.

This embarrassing awkwardness is no longer necessary. Why? Because you are about to learn the Chocolate Honesty Method. In just a few moments you will be able to initiate a conversation with the women of your dreams - without looking like an idiot or forcing them to appear to be jerks.

Here's how it works...

The moment you notice a woman you would like to meet, you confidently approach her - assured she won't reject you because you won't be giving her that option.

She sees you from a distance and thinks "Oh great, another dude hitting on me!" She has had to deal with this all day and she is sick and tired of these annoying trying-to-be-jerks-to-attract-women-but-actually-giant-pansy's. Fortunately, today, this won't be you!

As you near her you smoothly pull out the chocolate bar (Reese's, Hershey's, etc) that you have with you and say, "Excuse me, I just saw you from across the room and it brightened up my day. I wanted to give you this chocolate to say thanks." While completing this line you reach out with the chocolate bar and hand it to her or place it on a surface close to her and finish by saying, "Have a great day".

You then immediately turn around and start suavely walking away. If she has a boyfriend, or just isn't interested, you keep walking - knowing that your compliment made her day a little better and she will quite likely tell her friends about that great guy who didn't try to hit on her, but rather gave her a delicious chocolate delicacy.

However, provided she's not dating, she soon realizes that you're the man of her dreams - you're a gentleman and you provide for her chocolate needs - and you're leaving right now! This causes her to panic - why didn't this guy hit on me? Where is he going? Why is he so confident? What can I do to get more chocolate?

Then she shouts out, "Wait, stop!"

At this point, you turn around slowly, and say in and extended, deep voice, "Yes.....?"

Now she has to initiate part of the conversation! This gives her the ability to decide if she wants to talk to you. If she decides that she does, she gets to put some effort into the relationship as well - making things equal from the start.

There are now two things going for you. Not only are you a gentleman, but you can now tease her throughout the conversation for picking you up! You were simply being nice and giving her candy.

Because you were honest from the beginning, if you actually start liking this girl and she starts liking you, you don't have to tell her that you made up stories about yourself. You can be honest all the way through. Just make sure you don't accidentally make the mistakes I've made by reading What Not to Say to Women (From Personal Experience).

With this information I hope that you can go out there, have some fun, and start searching for the right woman rather than any woman. However, once you find her, make sure to read up on How to Know if a Chick Flick is "Guy Worthy" to make sure you keep up appearances around your new lady.

Learn more about humor and women by checking out The Alphabet of Humor: A is for Awkward.


The Step By Step Process

To conclude, let's go over the process one more time:

  1. Approach the woman with confidence
  2. Hand her a piece of chocolate while complimenting her
  3. Turn and start walking away - IMPORTANT!
  4. If she doesn't stop you, keep walking
  5. If she does stop you, slowly turn, smile, and reveal your awesomeness

Classy guys don't have to be jerks or fake to attract women. Be honest, state your intentions, and always treat women with respect. Follow these steps and pretty soon you won't need to buy chocolate ever again! Women will be giving it to you.

If you need more tips, read The Alphabet of Humor: C is for Character to discover how to find your style of humor. Now go be a ladies man.

Have you used this approach, or do you have any other great ways to attract women while being completely honest about yourself (and maybe having some fun)? I would love to have you comment about it below!

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    • Robert Erich profile image
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      Robert Erich 4 years ago from California

      If you did it in a joking way I am sure that she would think that it was funny or cute. However, make sure you don't scare the girl away. If she has made it clear that she is just interested in being friends, consider trying it with other girls instead.

    • profile image

      Xisanul 4 years ago

      This seems like a good idea. Does this work at the high school level? And also if you know the girl and talk to her, but you're not really that close?

    • Robert Erich profile image
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      Robert Erich 5 years ago from California

      Very deep and insightful comments! It's great to hear the other sides perspective so thoroughly. And sadly, many people do start talking to people with bad intentions. It makes it harder for those of us that just love meeting new people! Thanks for sharing.

    • mcleodgi profile image

      mcleodgi 5 years ago

      Very interesting. Always great to hear the other perspective. I am personally VERY cautious when getting to know new people and don't see anything wrong with this. Unfortunately, many have accused me of being "standoffish" and "antisocial" but that's NOT my intention at all. It's just due to my background and the fact that my trust has been betrayed too many times. I'm very lucky that my boyfriend (he was my best guy friend for years before we took our relationship to the next level-we're planning to get married and have kids together sometime within the next 5-8 years maybe less, depending) understands this about me. For a long time, I didn't even understand that it's in a lot of y'all's nature to chase us if rejected and thought that whenever a guy did that to me that he had bad intentions. Though I personally didn't understand a lot of things for a long time. I'm just writing all this to let you know that this could also possibly be the issue if a girl "acts like a jerk" when she rejects you.

      Can't say I've ever heard of the chocolate thing before and I think it's a great idea. It can give you a good feel for what she's like though first impressions aren't always a good sampling (I can tell you that that's the case with me most of the time). If any of the guys I've ever been with had thought to do something like to me, I would've been flattered since I'm a chocolate lover myself.

      I'd like to give you a kudos a thousand times over for refuting that stupid theory that y'all have to act like jerks or worse, pretend to be someone y'all are not to win us over. How would y'all like it if one of us did that to you? I'd like to know what type of people believe this (chauvenists, maybe?) and better yet, who came up with that theory in the first place.

      Most of the time, it's not that y'all "make us feel like jerks" but rather that we usually just feel bad about having to reject you because we know it'll hurt y'all.

    • Robert Erich profile image
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      Robert Erich 5 years ago from California

      @Geja: I am glad you enjoy. I am sure one day soon it will happen to you as this article takes off. ;) And yeah, the chocolate may not work so well for a man, but I am pretty sure any full meal will do the trick! The way to a man's heart is through his belly. If I were single and a woman brought me a home cooked lunch, I would certainly give her some serious attention!

    • Geja8856 profile image

      Geja8856 5 years ago

      It's.. Chocolaty, but I like it! Haven't seen that happen yet, though. I think people who are looking for someone they get more nervous and that's why they fail so easily. If one doesn't have any expectations it's much more easier to talk to a girl/guy. As is, I think the guys should def. stick with your suggestion. Love it! What about girls though? No guy will want chocolate handed to him like that. :) Beer, more likely.

    • msorensson profile image

      msorensson 5 years ago

      Wow...I thought I knew all of them..

      It was fun. I enjoyed it. Thanks.

    • msorensson profile image

      msorensson 5 years ago

      Wow...I thought I knew all of them..

      It was fun. I enjoyed it. Thanks.

    • Jeannieinabottle profile image

      Jeannie InABottle 5 years ago from Baltimore, MD

      This is a great technique for meeting women. At first, I thought this couldn't possibly work. However, the more I thought about it, the more I realized I would totally date a guy that gave me chocolate for no reason. Good job!

    • Robert Erich profile image
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      Robert Erich 5 years ago from California

      Thanks for stopping by Joe. Glad you enjoyed the article. It is true, it is not 100% honest, but I thought it was a fun thing to write about. Chocolate for that "eye candy"!

    • joejagodensky profile image

      joejagodensky 5 years ago from Milwaukee, Wisconsin

      Cleverly present. With regard to honesty; well, let's just say that the "eye candy" brought out your chocolate prop. Not quite honest but a handy gimmick. Thanks for the humorous hub.

    • Robert Erich profile image
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      Robert Erich 5 years ago from California

      Thanks rdsparrowriter! I'm glad it kept you entertained. Maybe you'll have to write the female version of this eh?

    • rdsparrowriter profile image

      rdsparrowriter 5 years ago

      You got a good sense of humour. Though I'm a girl, I enjoyed reading this hub :) Voted up!

    • bmcoll3278 profile image

      bmcoll3278 5 years ago from Longmont, Colorado

    • Robert Erich profile image
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      Robert Erich 5 years ago from California

      I'm glad you enjoyed it! I look forward to reading your hub on this great topic.

    • bmcoll3278 profile image

      bmcoll3278 5 years ago from Longmont, Colorado

      Great hub It gives me an idea for a hub. I do enjoy your work and this hub will be linked to. voted up

    • Robert Erich profile image
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      Robert Erich 5 years ago from California

      Thanks Haley! I do what I can to gain further insight into your gender. I hope you enjoy more of my hubs and I look forward to reading more of yours!

    • Haley Schaeffer profile image

      Haley Schaeffer 5 years ago from San Diego

      This is a really fun read Robert. And you definitely have some good insight into women. Lol! I look forward to reading more of your hubs!

    • Robert Erich profile image
      Author

      Robert Erich 5 years ago from California

      Jacqui2011, I must agree, Cadbury's are delicious! I'm glad that you enjoyed this article. I must say that it has worked five out of five times - so it's now scientifically proven - women like chocolate!

    • jacqui2011 profile image

      jacqui2011 5 years ago from Leicester, United Kingdom

      Armed with a bar of Cadbury's chocolate, you can be guaranteed to succeed in love. The way to a woman's heart is through chocolate. Very interesting and humorous hub. Voted up - funny/interesting.

    • Robert Erich profile image
      Author

      Robert Erich 5 years ago from California

      Snickers... that is a magical bar. And I'm glad you approve of this method SJmorningsun25. It is certainly a fun way to meet lovely ladies!

    • profile image

      SJmorningsun25 5 years ago

      This is fantastic, and hilarious. I don't know about other girls out there, but I'd definitely want to talk to someone who handed me a chocolate bar for "no apparent reason." Especially if it was a Snickers . . .

    • Robert Erich profile image
      Author

      Robert Erich 5 years ago from California

      Well, hello girl from my skits class (I am pretty confident that is who you are), I think it's time to step up and say who you are! ;) And do not worry, I have a beautiful girlfriend at Andrews - this article is to help those who are still searching. I hope you have a great rest of your day.

    • profile image

      still havent met 5 years ago

      i see that have not yet commented back to the previous comment but u have let it appear on the page so you mustve seen it. not a very good first impression to ur students. Teenagers dont blatantly like being ignored, bobby. by the way, id be careful with the girls. thats why our last chaplain ran away cuz he put himself into a situation he couldnt get out of n his mistakes caught up to him. so no flirting k?

    • profile image

      future acquaintance of yours 5 years ago

      i am not quite certain that this is appropriate writing for a future ozark adventist academy chaplain.....just kidding.....but seriously......this was just slightly awkward for one of youe future students to read....

    • Robert Erich profile image
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      Robert Erich 5 years ago from California

      @stricktlydating, I'm glad someone writing with your pen-name approves! I feel like it must truly be a success then. Thanks for the comment.

    • stricktlydating profile image

      StricktlyDating 5 years ago from Australia

      I'd love it and I'd definately fall for it! Awesome!

    • Ana Teixeira profile image

      Ana Teixeira 5 years ago from Oporto, Porto, Portugal

      Just to let you know I'll be linking this hub to one of mine. I think the information on your hub will interest people who read mine about women also. I just hope this info makes men a bit better at talking to us!

    • profile image

      Myrtha Noel 5 years ago

      Rob! This is why I love you and the reason why I think you're awesome! You're too funny.

    • Robert Erich profile image
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      Robert Erich 5 years ago from California

      @unrelentinggames:thanks for the support that I might one day figure it all out. lol.

      @Jenner: With your charm, I'm pretty sure you'll have no problem finding an awesome woman.

    • profile image

      Jenner 5 years ago

      Dude! This is good staff man. I am inspired now to go and meeting the girl of my dreams, it only takes some chocolate and some confidence ;)

    • profile image

      unrelentingamee 5 years ago

      Although I find your approach slightly manipulative-- setting her up to panic-- I can see that you've got a heart beating under all that charm. There's hope for you yet! There's also a chance she could recognize this move as that of a player, and not respond for that reason-- but enjoy the chocolate. But in the end, the woman gets free chocolate, that that's win-win! You're right on that. ;)

      I really enjoy the "Manly books" side bar-- I aim to read the first two! I'm really interested in questions of how men define masculinity for themselves, and find myself thinking and writing about gender often. I haven't gotten started on hubs yet, but have a blog. I may start soon!

    • Robert Erich profile image
      Author

      Robert Erich 5 years ago from California

      Lol. That's true. If she doesn't like chocolate, then the guy is definitely in trouble. Maybe a backup plan is necessary as well.

    • Amelia Aitken profile image

      Amelia Aitken 5 years ago from London, United Kingdom

      I think This is not so much helpful for those wrong women who doesn't like chocolate , Isn't it ? LOL !!

    • Robert Erich profile image
      Author

      Robert Erich 5 years ago from California

      Ana! Great to hear your opinion about this subject. And you totally grasped my purpose. The chocolate is great, but it's not all about the chocolate, it's about manning up - which means being sincere, honest, and developing a bit of integrity.

      Thanks for the approval ;)

    • Ana Teixeira profile image

      Ana Teixeira 5 years ago from Oporto, Porto, Portugal

      Well. now you've done it! You revealed the secret to a woman's heart. Chocolate! xD. Now everytime a man gives me chocolate I'll ask him if he read your post! xD

      Honestly now... this would probably work. The most important part is being polite and classy. The last thing we want is another look-at-me-i-am-so-hot kind of guy. We want a man that appreciates us without becoming "weird" about it.

      Please.... Men of the world.... READ THIS HUB and stop stalking us, or making up lame excuses. We can see right through you.

      Everytime men think they are the first ones using that line... trust me.. they're not! xD

      Very cool hub and also very funny! As a woman, the status of this hub is. : APPROVED!

    • Robert Erich profile image
      Author

      Robert Erich 5 years ago from California

      Hi JustAj,

      You're doing great with hubpages. Your articles are good and you've written quite a bit already. Awesome.

      Good point - you do need to be careful that you are not just going around being a looney. I suppose more of one's success in meeting people has to do with who you are as opposed to what you do (I think I'll write about this later to).

      But yes, I've started conversations with 4 different girls using chocolate. To be honest, I never went out of my way to buy chocolate to do this - I just had chocolate with me that I wasn't interested in eating. But every time it led to some fun conversation and the ability to joke around with several great women. I've never done it in hopes of finding a girlfriend - more just for the sake of having fun.

      Welcome to Hubpages and I wish you the best as you continue writing.

    • profile image

      JustAj 5 years ago

      Hey Robert,

      Thanks for the follow. As you can see i'm pretty new to this. I was checking out some of your hubs and i decided to start out with this one. First off this is very entertaining and somewhat persuasive. Chocolate really??? lol. Never knew chocolate was the key to a women's heart. Should he carry chocolate at all times and isn't it deceptive to purposefully carry something just to entice a women. Isn't that similar to the concept of buying a women a drink and why is this not weird to carry multiple pieces of chocolate around? better not be a hot day. Robert have you tried this method your self? lol This method seems to be more deceptive than honest but it may work nonetheless. This was really good and i'm going to share this on some of my twitter.

    • Robert Erich profile image
      Author

      Robert Erich 5 years ago from California

      @joecseko - hahaha! I agree with you completely, and I'm sure you have much more experience and knowledge in this area than I do - confidence is the key. But a classy, "nice" confidence can get you a lot further than one might think.

      As for my followers, don't be jealous. ;) Maybe people like you just view my articles and get excited... lol. Actually, I tried to start a music website (you can visit it at www.stageoff.com), and it hasn't been the success I hoped it would be. It did, however, provide me with a lot of experience and knowledge about marketing/PR on the internet and in real life (I've been in the local news twice and tweeted by a member of the WSJ). Networking is where it's at! And thanks for reading. I'll check out your work.

      @wixor. Actually, I have an article about that in the writing as we speak - give me another week or so and it'll be out! I've had my share of failed relationships, but believe I've discovered the big problem. I'll let you know when it's posted!

    • wixor profile image

      wixor 5 years ago

      I tend to agree with joseko, confidence is everything, and, of course, it allows you to be yourself, which is what is suggested.

      In fact, I'm looking forward to the next installment which, I hope, will tell us the secret of KEEPING a woman attracted to us. Required reading for some of us?

    • Robert Erich profile image
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      Robert Erich 5 years ago from California

      Elder Spirits, It's a lot of fun for sure! Watching is probably as fun as trying it. lol

      And yes Wixor, we are agreeing. It's fun to try old things in a new way.

    • wixor profile image

      wixor 5 years ago

      We are agreeing with each other, just in a very subtle way! Being yourself and treating people with respect is sometimes the last thing that a woman might expect!

    • Elder Spirits profile image

      Elder Spirits 5 years ago from Colorado

      Very creative! I would love to stand back and see this in action!

    • Robert Erich profile image
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      Robert Erich 5 years ago from California

      Well wixor, that is somewhat what I am saying, but more along the lines of hhunterr's comment - I really just believe the best bet is to enjoy life and have fun. I always strive to treat people with respect as number one, but my number two is just have fun! This chocolate trick is a great way to accomplish both of these goals.

    • profile image

      Beniram 5 years ago

      Dear Robert, good job.

    • hhunterr profile image

      hhunterr 5 years ago from Highway 24

      Humor, sometimes a better teacher than experience. Thank you, Robert.

    • wixor profile image

      wixor 5 years ago

      A great piece of writing! Like everything in life, things are always more complicated, especially in love and relationships. You are probably suggesting that one way of succeeding in a crowded field is to do the opposite of that which is expected!

    • Robert Erich profile image
      Author

      Robert Erich 5 years ago from California

      Definitely do that Slightly Bonkers. Dating is a tricky business, but I've realized that guys who are honest, have fun, and are comfortable with themselves tend to do alright with women. I'm sure your brother will meet someone awesome.

    • Slightly Bonkers profile image

      Slightly Bonkers 5 years ago from Ireland

      Great Hub - I have to forward this to my "little" brother..for inspiration hopefully and meeting a woman that "suits" him :D

    • Robert Erich profile image
      Author

      Robert Erich 5 years ago from California

      Thank you so much! And just so you know Alissa, I do not work for Hershey's (or Godiva), but I will not argue if they decide to financially benefit me for giving them business. lol.

    • Lucy Fuentes profile image

      Lucy Fuentes 5 years ago from Bronx, Newyork

      You're funny!!!!! Great good job...

    • Denise Handlon profile image

      Denise Handlon 5 years ago from North Carolina

      LOL That's funny! Looking forward to the Godiva! and thanks for the fan mail. :)

    • alissaroberts profile image

      Alissa Roberts 5 years ago from Normandy, TN

      Really enjoyed this hub! Chocolate companies everywhere will be thanking you for their sudden increase in sales. Great job - Voted up!

    • Robert Erich profile image
      Author

      Robert Erich 5 years ago from California

      Haha. You are an entertaining writer and commenter Denise. I can see why you are so popular on here. If one day I run into you, I will make sure to have Godiva.

      And okay, I'll give you a heads up when I've written about how you can safely wander the streets with moistened pants.

    • Denise Handlon profile image

      Denise Handlon 5 years ago from North Carolina

      Loved the hub-GREAT approach. I'll think of you should any guy walk up to me and offer me chocolate, LOL

      (BTW-where's the Godiva?)

      Very clever angle and well written. Oh-I'll be watching for the hub: how to appear to have dry pants when you don't..."

      Voted up

    • Robert Erich profile image
      Author

      Robert Erich 5 years ago from California

      Haha. A How I Met Your Mother fan! Awesome. Yes, I think anyone can be legendary - just takes the right approach. Thanks for commenting.

    • cheatlierepeat profile image

      cheatlierepeat 5 years ago from Canada

      I love this! Great writing, love the humor and I couldn't help but think of Barney Stintson when you said to reveal your awesomeness!!!!

    • Robert Erich profile image
      Author

      Robert Erich 5 years ago from California

      Yes! That could be legendary Vladi, let me know if it works. Just be careful - you don't want to appear like you've been watching her too long.

      But dude, I am jealous of your drawing abilities. Good luck!

    • profile image

      Vladi Dorfman 5 years ago

      Really enjoyable read!

      I'll try a different approach with a quick drawing (always carrying a pencil and a slip of paper with me!), we'll see if my charming self can work this out :)

      Thanks!

    • Robert Erich profile image
      Author

      Robert Erich 5 years ago from California

      Well thanks Ardie. Getting people to pee there pants was exactly what I was trying to do with this article because my next one is going to be titled "How to appear to have dry pants when you really don't"... Gotta keep people hooked! haha. But thanks again. Glad you enjoyed it.

    • Ardie profile image

      Sondra 5 years ago from Neverland

      THIS is good writing my friend. I had to see what your take was on meeting a woman - secretly hoping to laugh in your face. But you actually held my attention and made some very good points, not to mention some humor thrown in for good measure (I peed my pants?!) Voted UP