Do you think it's easier to accept cougars with young men, or older men with you

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  1. Charlu profile image76
    Charluposted 12 years ago

    Do you think it's easier to accept cougars with young men, or older men with young women and why?

    It seems to be coming more and more common these days for women to be with much younger men, and it's not just the stars anymore. Does it seem awkward due to society almost making it the "norm" for men but not for women or is it the whole mom issue???  What do you think?

  2. jdavis88 profile image90
    jdavis88posted 12 years ago

    depends on how  you look at it.  It may be more "normal" to see the old guy with the young girl, but how many female teachers have gotten off lately with a slap on the wrist for statutory rape where a male teacher would be in (or under) the jail??  Both are the same situation, we just see them differenlty.

    1. Charlu profile image76
      Charluposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      That definitely gives merit to the way we look at it. I can't remember the teachers name but I remember the controversy over how she couldn't go to jail because she was to pretty:) Probably won't hear of a man with that problem lol

    2. Levertis Steele profile image75
      Levertis Steeleposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      I think that statutory rape and other illegal sex-related acts between adults and children are a different subject. A 24-year old woman and a 56-year old man in a relationship is an example of the author's focus, I hope.

  3. dashingscorpio profile image79
    dashingscorpioposted 12 years ago

    I don't think older men have a problem with older women dating younger men. The whole "cougar" thing became big when Demi Moore started dating Ashton Kutcher. All of that noise was coming from his young (female) fans. They felt like she had stolen one of theirs. No man that I know of was upset about it. Now by contrast, traditionally older women looked down on older men who pursued relationships with younger women. Although more older women are dating younger men it is unlikely we see the equivalent of (a female version of Hugh Hefner), A woman in her (mid 80s) with false teeth and thinning hair dating handsome guys in their early 20s one right after another. Most men still place beauty over money when it comes to dating. Awhile back I wrote a more detailed opinion on this subject. As I stated men have never had a problem with age differences unless it involved someone dating their daughters!smile … gardaddies

    1. Charlu profile image76
      Charluposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Read your hub and you have some terrific points for both scenarios.  One thing a about it is when in sales, it definitely threw a wrench into greetings and introductions. There was no more assuming one was a daughter or son:)

    2. Levertis Steele profile image75
      Levertis Steeleposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Older men do not have a problem with older women dating younger men because these men generally are interested in younger, attractive, fertile women! They think that they have discovered the Fountain of Youth. In this case, I suppose they have.

  4. profile image50
    sydneyyposted 12 years ago

    I think that it is easier to except older men with a younger woman because it is very common. Women usually chose older men because they're more mature, although, it isn't the only reason. They pick older men because the older ones usually have their act together or have picked out what they want to do with their life. I don't see anything wrong with liking younger men if you're a woman because it isn't that big of a deal. I do notice the whole "cougar" rate going up though. It seems a little weird to me because I'm just not used to it. I'm sure people will except it and it's probably the norm now because age doesn't matter once you get to a certain age.

    1. Charlu profile image76
      Charluposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      I agree with you as to it being more common and probably why it is more acceptable. After reading dashingscorpios hub I have to admit I think he's right about us not seeing a female "Hugh Hefner" and I think that would be a whole different ball game.

  5. Sherry Hewins profile image93
    Sherry Hewinsposted 12 years ago

    I have no problem with it either way, as long as all the parties involved are consenting adults. I do think the term "cougar" seems derogatory, like she is some kind of predator.

    1. Levertis Steele profile image75
      Levertis Steeleposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Down through the years, men have preyed on girls and women much more than the other way around. There was a time when men married girls as young as 13-years old. they would still be doing it if the law had not stepped in.

    2. Charlu profile image76
      Charluposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Hmmm your right about the term cougar. I wonder who came up with that???

  6. Levertis Steele profile image75
    Levertis Steeleposted 12 years ago

    Since many older men have independence, maturity, wisdom, money, and VIAGRA, many young guys are forced to stand back and behold. They "can't touch that!" Older women hardly stand a chance of getting a man in their age category if they are not already married. So, a younger man it is, for a few of them even if they have to "buy" the man as many older men are doing with younger women. These arrangements are practically a "Trading Places" thing. These older people, men and women, buy the young by taking care of their financial needs.

    More seriously, yes, it is easier to accept older women with younger men because the older single guys rarely honor the older single women as potential mates. They view them as out to pasture when most of them (older men), in fact, are out to pasture AND over the hill. When I see these old guys limping behind these young women who look like their granddaughters, I sympathize, but some of them seem to be able to handle their lives pretty well.

    If these couples did it right, and did not dump their mates for youth, or did not commit statutory rape, more power to them! It is their choice. However, I sympathize with older widows who want a companion and won't likely get one.

    Truthfully speaking, if I were a single woman between 30 and 40, because of my experience with life and a young husband when we were young, I would marry a nice, clean, financially comfortable, settled gentleman. I reason that this type is likely learned, more mature and settled, and ready to resume a real, happy life. I would avoid all of the drama of youthful men. I have been there and done that, and it was an obstacle course.

    I caution very young people, especially, to think twice about marrying anyone generations older. Sometimes old people have a severe case of mid-life crisis and try to regain their youth by siphoning off someone very young. You will like end up baby sitting these old mates. Now, if the old one is a millionnaie, now, that is a different story! Just teasing. Just be careful.

  7. Escobana profile image75
    Escobanaposted 12 years ago

    I think the easiest thing to do for the couple involved in a relationship with a bigger age difference, is to accept society's opinions, to love eachother and to grow happily ever after.

    The question whether society finds it easy to accept age differences in relationships, is a question society will answer from it's own point of view. Always.

    What about likes and dislikes? I just don't like the men of my age. I like younger men and I fell in love with a younger man. He liked older women and he fell in love with me.

    It can be that simple apart from all the fuzz, opinions and views of others:-)

  8. YvetteParker profile image60
    YvetteParkerposted 12 years ago

    I think both are equally accepted as long as the age difference is not too significant, and both parties are adults.


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