My girlfriend broke up with me while I am studying in Australia

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  1. David Yue Cao profile image55
    David Yue Caoposted 4 years ago

    My girlfriend broke up with me while I am studying in Australia

    I am an international student from Beijing. I was having a really good time with my gf.
    Two month passed, yesterday she said she wanna quit. She can't bear the sufferings. She think there will be no future for us because of our different goals. This makes me feel like I am dying. I try to fix our relationship but she looks so determined.
    Living in Adelaide alone and no family, I feel so lonely and great pressure now. Sometimes I think it is meaningless for me to spend a huge sum of money coming to abroad. I lost her.
    What should I do now? I really don't want to let her go

  2. profile image0
    Dave36posted 4 years ago

    Hey buddy i know how you feel, but you have to accept the situation....You might feel like your dying at the moment, but really your learning/growing emotionally/mentally....Most people at some time have gone through what your going through, & i have myself....So what do you do?, do you cry/beg/plead with her?, OR, do you get cracking with your own life?....Whether you want her back or not the answer is still the same, you get busy getting busy....Don't ever sit there wondering how to get a girl back, instead become the man you want to become....So you get fit & do the stuff that you want to do, before you know it your'l have women all over you....You might reply saying: "yeah but i love her", but i'd ask do you really love her?....How many girlfriends have you had to know that you love her, so go & meet other women as you find things "you" love to do.....Because you will look back, & laugh at this situation before you know it we all do....As far as boredom & loneliness they are figments of your mind, so being bored or lonely is a sign that you should be doing more things/hobbies/interests, it's not a sign that you need a girlfriend....Also you don't actually know "yet", whether or not it's a good thing that you split up....It might just be a blessing in disguise, & you might even meet "the" girl for you tomorrow.....ONLY your mind will tell you otherwise, so don't listen to your mind....Like i say whether you want her back or not, you have to ignore her now as if she doesn't exist....If she misses you she'l come looking, if not thank her for the time you did have together, & move on & learn from her....p.s Stay sober from now until your fine with the situation, believe me iv'e been there & got the T-Shirt.

    1. David Yue Cao profile image55
      David Yue Caoposted 4 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks buddy! really thank you to responding me! i feel much better after reading that. "Don't ever sit there wondering how to get a girl back, instead become the man you want to become." That is what i am going to do. thank you

    2. profile image0
      Dave36posted 4 years agoin reply to this

      I'm gonna give you my number one tip in life buddy, & this is very powerful stuff!..Whenever you talk to anyone always smile first & say hi how you doing etc, & always look them in the eyes when chatting..Do this with everyone,  & alw

    3. David Yue Cao profile image55
      David Yue Caoposted 4 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks again. In daytime is alright. I need to do other things, which can distract me. I smiled to my classmates and chat happily. But in the night is so difficult. I wake up at 4 am in the morning. The dying feeling comes again. Will time cure this?

    4. profile image0
      Dave36posted 4 years agoin reply to this

      Yes buddy time will cure how you feel, or you can realise that "you" create your own feelings/emotions...Also use some logic mate you just had a nice girlfriend, so you will have another one that's logic...Accept that how you feel is normal.

  3. dashingscorpio profile image88
    dashingscorpioposted 4 years ago

    Move on.
    You don't have to worry about "letting her go". She has already let (you) go.
    The reality is long distance relationships are meant to be temporary. The only way they work is if the couple has a "light at the end of the tunnel". In other words they have a date which one of them will be moving to be with the other in addition to taking turns visiting one another, talking on the phone, emails, and Skype daily.
    When I was in college I can't tell you how many students thought they'd be able to maintain relationships with their high school sweethearts who had gone to other colleges. Usually after one or two semesters they broke up.
    They didn't realize how unrealistic it was to expect teenagers to pass up all the social activities and dating opportunities on campus simply because they had a long-distance relationship. They got tired of having lonely weekends watching other couples study, playing, laugh, walk hand in hand, dining together, kissing and making out while they're stuck studying alone or writing emails, and making phone calls to their mate in the distance.
    Sailing on a ship without a destination is bound to cause most people to jump overboard at some point. Not many young people can afford to travel back and forth monthly to spend time with each other which makes it even more difficult to maintain the relationship.
    Find you someone who is (where you are) and focus on your studies and enjoying life. The reality is your ex is not even blaming the (distance) for breaking up with you.
    She said it's because you have "different goals". It's not because she misses you or wish you were living in the same space. She doesn't see herself having a future with (you). In other words for it to have worked you would have to (change) your goals in life!
    If someone has to change who they are to make a relationship work then it's a sure sign they have selected the wrong mate for them self.
    Remember this: In order for her to be "the one" she would have to see (you) as being "the one". It make no sense to pursue someone who does not want to be with you!
    You deserve better than that!
    Best of luck!

    1. profile image0
      Dave36posted 4 years agoin reply to this

      Very true what you say about being the one....I know loads of people that reckon their ex was their soul mate, but i tell them they can't have been other wise they'd still be together....I got this last year, but some never get it & dwell for yea

  4. tehgyb profile image85
    tehgybposted 4 years ago

    Sorry to hear that, things will get better.
    I had a girlfriend while I was deployed to fight a war.
    She cheated on me the entire time. I know the feeling of being alone and betrayed.

    All I can say is keep your head up and find a hobby.
    Good luck my friend.

    1. profile image0
      Dave36posted 4 years agoin reply to this

      Hey buddy iv'e had some weird, & wonderful girlfriends over the years (although mostly weird!lol)...But i can look back, & clearly see what iv'e learn't from each one of them (about myself that is!)...I bet you learn't some valuable lessons f

 
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