- Gender and Relationships
Tips for Talking to People
Speaking to people
It's probably one of the biggest things that people have to overcome in life. It's very easy as a kid to just talk to complete strangers, but somewhere in growing up, we learn that it is not socially acceptable to just randomly talk to strangers anymore like we did as kids.
In school, you probably had your select group of friends, or maybe you were one of the few popular people. If you were or are, you probably don't need to read this. You already know how to connect with people quickly and develope rapport instantly. For others, however, it is not that easy. Talking to people can be a real stumbling block to people mentally. No one wants to be the creeper that just starts talking to people for no given reason.
There are ways around this though! You can talk to people without having to feel awkward about it all. I want to give you a little bit of advice about how to do just that.
have an opinion
If you don't have an actual opinion or thought about what is being talked about in a group, then don't say anything. Don't be the person that talks just to talk. People will notice if you are just speaking to be heard and you are not giving a real thought of expression.
An example of this would be something like: You're in a group of people. You all are just sitting around and shooting the breeze. The conversation might be about your favorite place to eat. Some people have said olive garden, some people have said outback steakhouse. They all gave their reasons as to why they like those places. You feel like you need to give your opinion, but you don't really have one about all of this. It's not something you really thought about. Instead of just spurting out random nothings that don't make sense, just imply that you have never really thought about what your favorite restaraunt is. The people might start making suggestions of places you should try so you can pick a favorite.
Don't just start randomly talking to strangers
We've all seen it. People standing in line at the bank or fast food joint and then all of the sudden some guy in front of some girl turns around and just starts rambling about something. How wierd is that anyway?? DON'T make that mistake. If you have a question to ask or if you have a small request, then by all means ask and request, but don't turn around just to make random conversation.
People by nature tend to be reserved around people they don't know. It might seem fine to you to just start talking to the next person you see, but others might feel threatened or intimidated or even weirded out about it all. DON'T let that be you.
BUT There's a trick to it all. If you would like to make conversation to someone then please start with a quick question. Keep the convo short and to the point, and if the other person seems interested to talk or finds you interesting, then keep the convo going. There are two ways to meet new people. Through your friends, and by yourself. No other given.
Keep the topic light hearted
So if you're talking to someone new the first time. Chances are that you are going to want to keep the topic light Hearted. There are exceptions to this, but this is generally the rule of thumb. I've had deep conversations with people whose name I didn't even know, but most of the time if I am talking to someone new, we are just shooting the breeze and keeping it light. Keep it humorous as well. Make sure you leave room to laugh in your convo because having someone to laugh with creates a deeper connection right from the start.
But try to stay away from the cliche topics like the weather....period.
I'm usually talking about something that is relevent to where we are at the time. If I'm in a store talking to someone, it might be about the sales going on. Or how crowded or dead it is in the room.